SATARA, MAHARASHTRA // When Shivaji Pisar's third child was born, yet another daughter, his parents insisted on naming her Nakusa, "Unwanted" in the local Marathi language.
"I didn't really care what we called her. Three girls is one too many," said Mr Pisar, 37, a shepherd.
Yesterday, however, Nakusa, 5, joined more than 200 other girls in a renaming ceremony in the small town of Satara, 260 kilometres south of Mumbai. During the ceremony, the girls and their parents and guardians took an oath to protect the girls, discourage discrimination and refrain from using names such as Unwanted.
These girls, most named Nakusa or Nakoshi, were handed name-change certificates, allowing them to legally change their names to whatever they wished. A few days before the ceremony, many of them chose to re-register themselves using the names of Bollywood actresses.
The second of six sisters, Nakusa Budhwale, 11, the daughter of a labourer, will now be known as Aishwarya after the Bollywood actress Aishwarya Rai, whose name means "wealth".
"She won a beauty contest. She makes good movies. I like her," she said. "Not everyone can be like her. I want to be."
Most, however, deferred to their parents.
Nakusa Pisar became "Puja," which means worship. Her father remained as ambivalent about the name change as he was about Puja's birth.
"What difference does it make? She does not understand what any of this means," said Mr Pisar.
But Nakusa Kirdat, 32, a primary schoolteacher, knows exactly what it means to grow up rejected by her family. She is the third child and daughter. Her grandmother and mother insisted on calling her Nakusa.
"I felt guilty about who I was all the time. When I used to introduce myself, people used to laugh at me. That is what I most remember - feeling really hurt about my name," said Mrs Kirdat.
That hurt turned her into a determined person, she said, one who resolved to move away and prove to her family that she was not a burden or a curse. She is the only member of her farming family who is a college graduate.
Mrs Kirdat, now the mother of two sons, decided to name herself, Shruti, which means "revelation".
"I always thought that if I had a daughter, I would call her Shruti. I guess I will take that name," she said.
It is a commonly held belief in rural areas such as Satara that to name a girl Unwanted is to jinx her and reject her, said Sudha Kankaria, a women's rights activist in Satara who launched the name-change champaign. By rejecting her you provoke the gods into giving you a son.
Mr Pisar's fourth child was a son.
For the past 25 years, Ms Kankaria has worked in the towns and villages around Satara, helping girls through her NGO, Save the Girl Child. It was during her visits to Satara 2007 that she noticed a spike in the number of girls called Nakusa, or its variations, as well as names such as Dagadi or Dhondi, which means a stone - a burden that weighs down a family.
"The perception was that even if this girl is here, we don't want her and we are going to make sure she is unwanted. It was so cruel, but it was steeped in cultural beliefs," said Ms Kankaria.
These girls, Ms Kankaria said, were more likely to abort if their child was a girl.
"She thinks, 'why should I give my hardships to her', so she aborts," claimed Ms Kankaria.
Female foeticide and infanticide has long been an issue in India. In 1994 the country banned the use of ultrasound to determine gender in an effort to stem the practice. Despite this, the female-to-male ratio continues to widen in India, indicating that the ban is being ignored.
India has a lower than average ratio of females to males compared to most of the world, where the ratio is closer to 50-50. Within India, the state of Maharashtra, where Satara is located, has the largest imbalance: 883 females for every 1,000 males.
Culture and economics drive the preference for boys.
"In the Indian culture, the girl child is seen as a burden for the dowry payment that her parents must pay during her wedding," said Vijayalakshmi Arora, the head of policy and advocacy at the Indian non-profit group Child Rights and You.
In Hindi and other Indian languages, there are aphorisms about an Indian girl child "belonging to someone else", or being the "wealth of someone else", implying that the benefits of any money or education spent on a girl will be enjoyed by the in-laws, Ms Arora said.
Religious belief also is a factor. In Hinduism, it is a deep-rooted belief that a girl cannot cremate her dead parents. Families without male heirs worry that they will have no one to perform the last rites.
That, however, does not excuse the damage inflicted on the psyches of these young women, said Ms Arora. These girls "grow up angry, with a sense of resentment".
Nakusa Patol, 8, certainly knows what it is like to be angry.
Nakusa, renamed Pranila, hated her name because of the bullying at school, where depending on her mood, she would either fight back of bury her head in her arms.
"I am the only girl in school with a terrible name like that," she said. "I am hoping the new name will change everything."
"When she was born, I did not like it," said Geeta Patol, her mother. "We were already burdened with four girls and she was our fifth.
"Now she turns around and asks me, 'Why did you name me like that?'"
Pranila said she will no longer fight or hide when confronted with bullying. "I will pretend I don't know who they are talking about."
sbhattacharya@thenational.ae
Three ways to limit your social media use
Clinical psychologist, Dr Saliha Afridi at The Lighthouse Arabia suggests three easy things you can do every day to cut back on the time you spend online.
1. Put the social media app in a folder on the second or third screen of your phone so it has to remain a conscious decision to open, rather than something your fingers gravitate towards without consideration.
2. Schedule a time to use social media instead of consistently throughout the day. I recommend setting aside certain times of the day or week when you upload pictures or share information.
3. Take a mental snapshot rather than a photo on your phone. Instead of sharing it with your social world, try to absorb the moment, connect with your feeling, experience the moment with all five of your senses. You will have a memory of that moment more vividly and for far longer than if you take a picture of it.
The specs
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A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
The rules on fostering in the UAE
A foster couple or family must:
- be Muslim, Emirati and be residing in the UAE
- not be younger than 25 years old
- not have been convicted of offences or crimes involving moral turpitude
- be free of infectious diseases or psychological and mental disorders
- have the ability to support its members and the foster child financially
- undertake to treat and raise the child in a proper manner and take care of his or her health and well-being
- A single, divorced or widowed Muslim Emirati female, residing in the UAE may apply to foster a child if she is at least 30 years old and able to support the child financially
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Qyubic
Started: October 2023
Founder: Namrata Raina
Based: Dubai
Sector: E-commerce
Current number of staff: 10
Investment stage: Pre-seed
Initial investment: Undisclosed
Cricket World Cup League 2
UAE squad
Rahul Chopra (captain), Aayan Afzal Khan, Ali Naseer, Aryansh Sharma, Basil Hameed, Dhruv Parashar, Junaid Siddique, Muhammad Farooq, Muhammad Jawadullah, Muhammad Waseem, Omid Rahman, Rahul Bhatia, Tanish Suri, Vishnu Sukumaran, Vriitya Aravind
Fixtures
Friday, November 1 – Oman v UAE
Sunday, November 3 – UAE v Netherlands
Thursday, November 7 – UAE v Oman
Saturday, November 9 – Netherlands v UAE
EXPATS
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NO OTHER LAND
Director: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham, Rachel Szor, Hamdan Ballal
Stars: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham
Rating: 3.5/5
UPI facts
More than 2.2 million Indian tourists arrived in UAE in 2023
More than 3.5 million Indians reside in UAE
Indian tourists can make purchases in UAE using rupee accounts in India through QR-code-based UPI real-time payment systems
Indian residents in UAE can use their non-resident NRO and NRE accounts held in Indian banks linked to a UAE mobile number for UPI transactions
What went into the film
25 visual effects (VFX) studios
2,150 VFX shots in a film with 2,500 shots
1,000 VFX artists
3,000 technicians
10 Concept artists, 25 3D designers
New sound technology, named 4D SRL
The biog
Favourite hobby: I love to sing but I don’t get to sing as much nowadays sadly.
Favourite book: Anything by Sidney Sheldon.
Favourite movie: The Exorcist 2. It is a big thing in our family to sit around together and watch horror movies, I love watching them.
Favourite holiday destination: The favourite place I have been to is Florence, it is a beautiful city. My dream though has always been to visit Cyprus, I really want to go there.
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Engine: 5.6-litre V8
Gearbox: Seven-speed automatic
Power: 428hp @ 5,800rpm
Torque: 560Nm @ 3,600rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 12.7L / 100km
Ms Yang's top tips for parents new to the UAE
- Join parent networks
- Look beyond school fees
- Keep an open mind
The specs
Engine: four-litre V6 and 3.5-litre V6 twin-turbo
Transmission: six-speed and 10-speed
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The biog
Born: Kuwait in 1986
Family: She is the youngest of seven siblings
Time in the UAE: 10 years
Hobbies: audiobooks and fitness: she works out every day, enjoying kickboxing and basketball
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The specs
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MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League, last 16, first leg
Liverpool v Bayern Munich, midnight (Wednesday), BeIN Sports