Neha Ghosh cried tears of joy after a positive pregnancy test in 2020. The business development associate was about to become a mother for the first time at the age of 30.
But two years later, she says her experience of motherhood was very different from its portrayal in popular culture and society.
After giving birth, there were days when she felt befuddled, anxious and frustrated. At other times she was overprotective, extra careful and loving to her daughter, now 20 months old.
But the scariest days were when she had fleeting suicidal thoughts.
“Whenever I started to feel like that, I used to get so furious and helpless that I wanted to end my and my baby's life … I thought no one cared or would care for my baby if I died alone,” Ms Ghosh told The National.
She is among millions of women globally who, to varying degrees, are found to experience postpartum depression, or PPD.
This is a complex medical condition in which new mothers experience difficulty connecting with their child and swing between emotional highs and lows with frequent bouts of crying, anxiety, guilt and tiredness.
But women in India, where there is little awareness of the condition and discussion of mental health issues is considered taboo, appear to experience higher levels of PPD than elsewhere.
A report in 2020 by the US Centres for Disease Control found that about one in eight women experience symptoms of maternal depression, whereas about 22 per cent of Indian mothers are diagnosed with the condition, according to a report by the World Health Organisation in 2018.
PPD typically affects new mothers within two weeks of childbirth and in severe cases can lead to the woman harming herself or the child.
In January, a woman, 30, took her own life in the southern Indian state of Karnataka nine months after giving birth to a baby boy.
Soundarya Neeraj, a doctor and a granddaughter of former Karnataka chief minister BS Yediyurappa, had been diagnosed with PPD, according to some media reports.
Out of every 10 depressed patients we receive, two are for PPD. There has been a consistent rise in such cases in the past decade
Pulkit Sharma,
psychologist
“Out of every 10 depressed patients we receive, two are for PPD. There has been a consistent rise in such cases in the past decade,” Dr Pulkit Sharma, a psychologist at Vimhans, a neurosciences hospital in New Delhi, told The National.
While the condition is treatable, experts say there is very little awareness about PPD and the dangers it poses to the life and health of a new mother.
In many cases neither the women nor their families recognise the condition in time to get professional help and prevent complications.
Dr Sharma blames the lack of awareness and space for a woman to express herself as her life changes emotionally, physically, financially and socially after childbirth.
Traditionally, Indian women were seen as “just” mothers, but many now have flourishing careers and live in nuclear households instead of joint households.
For them, having a child brings overwhelming feelings of sidelining their careers and having to care for the family and the new baby alone.
Many people dismiss such feelings as “baby blues”, which primarily manifest as moodiness for up to two weeks after delivery. But in some women these feelings last much longer and can turn into PPD.
“Families do not understand the kind of changes a woman has gone through in such a short span of time, from her body to whole lifestyle,” Dr Sharma said.
India is a country with a strong family system, but some women feel left out as families, including partners, focus on the care of the baby, ignoring the needs of the mother.
“Families pay entire attention to the newborn. They forget the needs of the woman who has just given birth,” said Anjali Jain, 30, a mother recovering from PPD.
Ms Jain, from Noida, outside Delhi, had her first child, a son, three years ago. The pregnancy was not smooth but her real struggle began post-delivery.
“I felt disconnected from the child and detached from my husband. I started seeing my in-laws as an enemy who were smitten by my child but paid very little attention to me,” she said.
“They could not understand that I also needed love and care. But this has been a norm. Once the baby is out, the woman's identity is lost.”
Families pay entire attention to the newborn. They forget the needs of the woman who has just given birth
Anjali Jain,
30
A voracious reader, Ms Jain turned to medical blogs and books for answers. She also spoke of her feelings to her husband and in-laws, helping in her slow recovery.
But for Ms Ghosh, the severe mood swings and suicidal thoughts continued until she sought medical help last April after her father died in India's second wave of Covid-19 infections.
She is now receiving counselling and says that although the road to complete recovery is long, she is working towards healing.
“Something happened … I know the problems and am working on them. Most importantly, I am glad I didn’t take the extreme step,” she said.
Dr Sharma says while severe cases — about 3 to 4 per cent of the total — require professional treatment, including counselling and medication, patients with mild cases can be treated with emotional support and patient hearing, like in the case of Ms Jain.
He emphasised the need to watch for early signs of PPD in mothers, such as self-neglect, feeling disconnected from the child, crying and doubting their decision to give birth.
If you have been affected by any of the details raised in this story, you can contact the Vidyasagar Institute of Mental Health, Neuro & Allied Sciences (Vimhans) helpline, +91 9999 691 507, or email help@vimhans.com.
PROFILE OF CURE.FIT
Started: July 2016
Founders: Mukesh Bansal and Ankit Nagori
Based: Bangalore, India
Sector: Health & wellness
Size: 500 employees
Investment: $250 million
Investors: Accel, Oaktree Capital (US); Chiratae Ventures, Epiq Capital, Innoven Capital, Kalaari Capital, Kotak Mahindra Bank, Piramal Group’s Anand Piramal, Pratithi Investment Trust, Ratan Tata (India); and Unilever Ventures (Unilever’s global venture capital arm)
Who has lived at The Bishops Avenue?
- George Sainsbury of the supermarket dynasty, sugar magnate William Park Lyle and actress Dame Gracie Fields were residents in the 1930s when the street was only known as ‘Millionaires’ Row’.
- Then came the international super rich, including the last king of Greece, Constantine II, the Sultan of Brunei and Indian steel magnate Lakshmi Mittal who was at one point ranked the third richest person in the world.
- Turkish tycoon Halis Torprak sold his mansion for £50m in 2008 after spending just two days there. The House of Saud sold 10 properties on the road in 2013 for almost £80m.
- Other residents have included Iraqi businessman Nemir Kirdar, singer Ariana Grande, holiday camp impresario Sir Billy Butlin, businessman Asil Nadir, Paul McCartney’s former wife Heather Mills.
Hunting park to luxury living
- Land was originally the Bishop of London's hunting park, hence the name
- The road was laid out in the mid 19th Century, meandering through woodland and farmland
- Its earliest houses at the turn of the 20th Century were substantial detached properties with extensive grounds
Skoda Superb Specs
Engine: 2-litre TSI petrol
Power: 190hp
Torque: 320Nm
Price: From Dh147,000
Available: Now
It
Director: Andres Muschietti
Starring: Bill Skarsgard, Jaeden Lieberher, Sophia Lillis, Chosen Jacobs, Jeremy Ray Taylor
Three stars
Brief scoreline:
Crystal Palace 2
Milivojevic 76' (pen), Van Aanholt 88'
Huddersfield Town 0
Test
Director: S Sashikanth
Cast: Nayanthara, Siddharth, Meera Jasmine, R Madhavan
Star rating: 2/5
How to help
Send “thenational” to the following numbers or call the hotline on: 0502955999
2289 – Dh10
2252 – Dh 50
6025 – Dh20
6027 – Dh 100
6026 – Dh 200
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The biog:
From: Wimbledon, London, UK
Education: Medical doctor
Hobbies: Travelling, meeting new people and cultures
Favourite animals: All of them
if you go
The flights
Air France offer flights from Dubai and Abu Dhabi to Cayenne, connecting in Paris from Dh7,300.
The tour
Cox & Kings (coxandkings.com) has a 14-night Hidden Guianas tour of Guyana, Suriname and French Guiana. It includes accommodation, domestic flights, transfers, a local tour manager and guided sightseeing. Contact for price.
If you go:
Getting there:
Flying to Guyana requires first reaching New York with either Emirates or Etihad, then connecting with JetBlue or Caribbean Air at JFK airport. Prices start from around Dh7,000.
Getting around:
Wildlife Worldwide offers a range of Guyana itineraries, such as its small group tour, the 15-day ‘Ultimate Guyana Nature Experience’ which features Georgetown, the Iwokrama Rainforest (one of the world’s four remaining pristine tropical rainforests left in the world), the Amerindian village of Surama and the Rupununi Savannah, known for its giant anteaters and river otters; wildlifeworldwide.com
Who was Alfred Nobel?
The Nobel Prize was created by wealthy Swedish chemist and entrepreneur Alfred Nobel.
- In his will he dictated that the bulk of his estate should be used to fund "prizes to those who, during the preceding year, have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind".
- Nobel is best known as the inventor of dynamite, but also wrote poetry and drama and could speak Russian, French, English and German by the age of 17. The five original prize categories reflect the interests closest to his heart.
- Nobel died in 1896 but it took until 1901, following a legal battle over his will, before the first prizes were awarded.
A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Silent Hill f
Publisher: Konami
Platforms: PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X/S, PC
Rating: 4.5/5
Three trading apps to try
Sharad Nair recommends three investment apps for UAE residents:
- For beginners or people who want to start investing with limited capital, Mr Nair suggests eToro. “The low fees and low minimum balance requirements make the platform more accessible,” he says. “The user interface is straightforward to understand and operate, while its social element may help ease beginners into the idea of investing money by looking to a virtual community.”
- If you’re an experienced investor, and have $10,000 or more to invest, consider Saxo Bank. “Saxo Bank offers a more comprehensive trading platform with advanced features and insight for more experienced users. It offers a more personalised approach to opening and operating an account on their platform,” he says.
- Finally, StashAway could work for those who want a hands-off approach to their investing. “It removes one of the biggest challenges for novice traders: picking the securities in their portfolio,” Mr Nair says. “A goal-based approach or view towards investing can help motivate residents who may usually shy away from investment platforms.”