While some struggle to adapt to the years that tick by, Farah Andrews is attempting to remain rational. Farah Andrews / The National
While some struggle to adapt to the years that tick by, Farah Andrews is attempting to remain rational. Farah Andrews / The National
While some struggle to adapt to the years that tick by, Farah Andrews is attempting to remain rational. Farah Andrews / The National
While some struggle to adapt to the years that tick by, Farah Andrews is attempting to remain rational. Farah Andrews / The National

Misogyny of ageing: Why I'm trying to be kinder to myself, despite the eye wrinkles


Farah Andrews
  • English
  • Arabic

I read recently that we all have a mental age, the age you automatically assume you are before your rational mind kicks in with reality. For the pragmatic among us that will just keep up with the ticking years and be your actual age, for others there is a momentary delay, a millisecond of confusion.

Me? Mentally I am 26. So imagine my surprise when a series of birthday cards informed me that I turned 34 this week.

To date, ages have never bothered me. Granted, I have only had a handful of decade milestones, but I have watched friends struggle as the numbers tick up like clockwork or, worse, they need to start ticking new age bracket boxes on forms. Thirty-five seems to be a real kicker there, so I have that to look forward to next year.

Although I do remember being 19 and lamenting the prospect of turning 20 with a borderline stranger. I don’t think I was actually worried about turning 20, but pop culture had told me that being anything older than a teenager was, frankly, terrible. Bar, of course, the 21 loophole, which we celebrate despite the fact it has almost zero remaining cultural impact in the UK. That borderline stranger laughed at me and my faux woes. At the time I thought he was ancient, he was probably 34.

Rationally, of course, I know that ageing is a privilege. Every day I age, I am getting to do what many haven’t and should carpe every single diem. Try telling that to the voice in my head, the commentary that asks where the lines around my eyes have come from (and what I plan to do about it?), and spends a few minutes a night scanning for hairs on my chin and wiry greys emerging from my parting. And that is before I embark on the six-to-eight-step beauty regime I have introduced to curb any physical signs that I am now in my 30s.

Sarah Jessica Parker has spoken about having grey hair in recent years. Reuters
Sarah Jessica Parker has spoken about having grey hair in recent years. Reuters

I think this is the root of my new annual woe, a deeply embedded notion that women just aren’t meant to age. And if we do, we should do it quietly, just without too many lines on our faces. Although, don’t go too far the other way, because we’ll be just as maligned (if not more) for an over-ironed, frozen expression.

We celebrate silver foxes, but sensationalise women who go “au naturale” with their grey hair. Sarah Jessica Parker is one such woman, who in recent years has allowed her silver hair to come through. She was described as “brave” for doing so.

“There’s so much misogynist chatter in response to us that would never happen about a man,” Parker told Vogue in 2021.

“Especially on social media, everyone has something to say. ‘She has too many wrinkles, she doesn’t have enough wrinkles.’ It almost feels as if people don’t want us to be perfectly okay with where we are, as if they almost enjoy us being pained by who we are today, whether we choose to age naturally and not look perfect, or whether you do something if that makes you feel better. I know what I look like. I have no choice. What am I going to do about it? Stop ageing? Disappear?”

This is the attitude I am going to try and carry this year.

I can’t promise I am going to retire the AHAs, BHAs and retinol from my evening routine, or cancel any upcoming laser facial appointments. But I will try and be kind to myself when I see a new line appear around my eyes, endeavour not to delete it from my camera roll and stop airbrushing my own self-image, muting an internalised misogyny.

In numbers: PKK’s money network in Europe

Germany: PKK collectors typically bring in $18 million in cash a year – amount has trebled since 2010

Revolutionary tax: Investigators say about $2 million a year raised from ‘tax collection’ around Marseille

Extortion: Gunman convicted in 2023 of demanding $10,000 from Kurdish businessman in Stockholm

Drug trade: PKK income claimed by Turkish anti-drugs force in 2024 to be as high as $500 million a year

Denmark: PKK one of two terrorist groups along with Iranian separatists ASMLA to raise “two-digit million amounts”

Contributions: Hundreds of euros expected from typical Kurdish families and thousands from business owners

TV channel: Kurdish Roj TV accounts frozen and went bankrupt after Denmark fined it more than $1 million over PKK links in 2013 

Specs

Engine: Duel electric motors
Power: 659hp
Torque: 1075Nm
On sale: Available for pre-order now
Price: On request

Pharaoh's curse

British aristocrat Lord Carnarvon, who funded the expedition to find the Tutankhamun tomb, died in a Cairo hotel four months after the crypt was opened.
He had been in poor health for many years after a car crash, and a mosquito bite made worse by a shaving cut led to blood poisoning and pneumonia.
Reports at the time said Lord Carnarvon suffered from “pain as the inflammation affected the nasal passages and eyes”.
Decades later, scientists contended he had died of aspergillosis after inhaling spores of the fungus aspergillus in the tomb, which can lie dormant for months. The fact several others who entered were also found dead withiin a short time led to the myth of the curse.

COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Brief scores:

Toss: India, opted to field

Australia 158-4 (17 ov)

Maxwell 46, Lynn 37; Kuldeep 2-24

India 169-7 (17 ov)

Dhawan 76, Karthik 30; Zampa 2-22

Result: Australia won by 4 runs by D/L method

The%20specs
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEngine%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E77kWh%202%20motors%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E178bhp%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E410Nm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERange%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E402km%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EDh%2C150%2C000%20(estimate)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOn%20sale%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ETBC%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Jurassic%20Park
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A MINECRAFT MOVIE

Director: Jared Hess

Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa

Rating: 3/5

The Byblos iftar in numbers

29 or 30 days – the number of iftar services held during the holy month

50 staff members required to prepare an iftar

200 to 350 the number of people served iftar nightly

160 litres of the traditional Ramadan drink, jalab, is served in total

500 litres of soup is served during the holy month

200 kilograms of meat is used for various dishes

350 kilograms of onion is used in dishes

5 minutes – the average time that staff have to eat
 

UAE v Zimbabwe A, 50 over series

Fixtures
Thursday, Nov 9 - 9.30am, ICC Academy, Dubai
Saturday, Nov 11 – 9.30am, ICC Academy, Dubai
Monday, Nov 13 – 2pm, Dubai International Stadium
Thursday, Nov 16 – 2pm, ICC Academy, Dubai
Saturday, Nov 18 – 9.30am, ICC Academy, Dubai

The specs: 2018 Renault Megane

Price, base / as tested Dh52,900 / Dh59,200

Engine 1.6L in-line four-cylinder

Transmission Continuously variable transmission

Power 115hp @ 5,500rpm

Torque 156Nm @ 4,000rpm

Fuel economy, combined 6.6L / 100km

UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Company info

Company name: Entrupy 

Co-founders: Vidyuth Srinivasan, co-founder/chief executive, Ashlesh Sharma, co-founder/chief technology officer, Lakshmi Subramanian, co-founder/chief scientist

Based: New York, New York

Sector/About: Entrupy is a hardware-enabled SaaS company whose mission is to protect businesses, borders and consumers from transactions involving counterfeit goods.  

Initial investment/Investors: Entrupy secured a $2.6m Series A funding round in 2017. The round was led by Tokyo-based Digital Garage and Daiwa Securities Group's jointly established venture arm, DG Lab Fund I Investment Limited Partnership, along with Zach Coelius. 

Total customers: Entrupy’s customers include hundreds of secondary resellers, marketplaces and other retail organisations around the world. They are also testing with shipping companies as well as customs agencies to stop fake items from reaching the market in the first place. 

What can you do?

Document everything immediately; including dates, times, locations and witnesses

Seek professional advice from a legal expert

You can report an incident to HR or an immediate supervisor

You can use the Ministry of Human Resources and Emiratisation’s dedicated hotline

In criminal cases, you can contact the police for additional support

Red flags
  • Promises of high, fixed or 'guaranteed' returns.
  • Unregulated structured products or complex investments often used to bypass traditional safeguards.
  • Lack of clear information, vague language, no access to audited financials.
  • Overseas companies targeting investors in other jurisdictions - this can make legal recovery difficult.
  • Hard-selling tactics - creating urgency, offering 'exclusive' deals.

Courtesy: Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching

The biog

Name: Abeer Al Shahi

Emirate: Sharjah – Khor Fakkan

Education: Master’s degree in special education, preparing for a PhD in philosophy.

Favourite activities: Bungee jumping

Favourite quote: “My people and I will not settle for anything less than first place” – Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid.

Honeymoonish
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UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Citadel: Honey Bunny first episode

Directors: Raj & DK

Stars: Varun Dhawan, Samantha Ruth Prabhu, Kashvi Majmundar, Kay Kay Menon

Rating: 4/5

The specs: 2019 Audi A7 Sportback

Price, base: Dh315,000

Engine: 3.0-litre V6

Transmission: Seven-speed automatic

Power: 335hp @ 5,000rpm

Torque: 500Nm @ 1,370rpm

Fuel economy 5.9L / 100km

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MATCH INFO

Bayern Munich 2 Borussia Monchengladbach 1
Bayern:
 Zirkzee (26'), Goretzka (86')
Gladbach: Pavard (37' og)

Man of the Match: Breel Embolo (Borussia Monchengladbach)

From Zero

Artist: Linkin Park

Label: Warner Records

Number of tracks: 11

Rating: 4/5

The five pillars of Islam

1. Fasting 

2. Prayer 

3. Hajj 

4. Shahada 

5. Zakat 

Children who witnessed blood bath want to help others

Aged just 11, Khulood Al Najjar’s daughter, Nora, bravely attempted to fight off Philip Spence. Her finger was injured when she put her hand in between the claw hammer and her mother’s head.

As a vital witness, she was forced to relive the ordeal by police who needed to identify the attacker and ensure he was found guilty.

Now aged 16, Nora has decided she wants to dedicate her career to helping other victims of crime.

“It was very horrible for her. She saw her mum, dying, just next to her eyes. But now she just wants to go forward,” said Khulood, speaking about how her eldest daughter was dealing with the trauma of the incident five years ago. “She is saying, 'mama, I want to be a lawyer, I want to help people achieve justice'.”

Khulood’s youngest daughter, Fatima, was seven at the time of the attack and attempted to help paramedics responding to the incident.

“Now she wants to be a maxillofacial doctor,” Khulood said. “She said to me ‘it is because a maxillofacial doctor returned your face, mama’. Now she wants to help people see themselves in the mirror again.”

Khulood’s son, Saeed, was nine in 2014 and slept through the attack. While he did not witness the trauma, this made it more difficult for him to understand what had happened. He has ambitions to become an engineer.

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UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
THE BIO: Martin Van Almsick

Hometown: Cologne, Germany

Family: Wife Hanan Ahmed and their three children, Marrah (23), Tibijan (19), Amon (13)

Favourite dessert: Umm Ali with dark camel milk chocolate flakes

Favourite hobby: Football

Breakfast routine: a tall glass of camel milk

Updated: March 10, 2023, 6:02 PM`