There’s something in the air — and I’m not talking about the sandstorms. It smells of freedom and no more small voices relentlessly demanding snacks.
It is the looming return of school, a date I have had marked on my calendar with a large red circle since they broke up in June.
Back to school falls on my birthday, Monday, August 29, and I tell my children they don’t need to buy me anything, because them going back through those gates is the greatest gift they could give me.
With the new term starting soon, here are the five stages all parents will recognise on their journey to ushering the children out the door.
Emails from the school start arriving
During term time, I receive on average about 400 emails a day from the school, so it’s always nice to give my inbox a break during the summer holidays.
One of the biggest indicators that it’s time to go back is when the messages start coming in again.
There will be the ones about new teachers, the warnings to book your uniform appointment, the pre-term surveys, the parent workshops and the school-branded credit card offers (5 per cent off fees if you use it).
There are also the reminders about paying the fees, the gentle reminders about paying the fees, and the final reminders about will you please just pay the fees already!
The ‘which class is your child in?’ frenzy
Emails about which class your child has been put in start arriving around now.
These will result in your phone lighting up with messages from parents in group chats you thought you’d left three years ago, asking which teacher your child has. Celebratory emojis will follow as friends are reunited.
There is also the parent who still hasn’t received their email and starts to feel not only a little anxious (have they forgotten my child?), but also a little left out.
The new uniform shop
Remember the bun fight that used to be the school uniform warehouses in Al Quoz? Uniform shops in the final days of the holidays can still get a little Mad Max-ish, but these days you need to make an appointment.
Without fail, I arrive there thinking I only need to get a couple of pairs of shorts and whichever top they need this year.
An hour later, I have spent the GDP of a small developing nation on ties, caps, backpacks, book bags, jumpers, PE kits, socks, PE bags, swimming trunks, swimming caps, hair scrunchies, shoes, belts and fleeces.
The mystery of the empty pencil cases
Peering into the pencil cases from last term is like opening the microwave after hearing your food make an explosive “pop” inside. To be done with trepidation.
In my mind, I think my children will by and large still have everything I bought last year: scissors, glue, colouring pencils, pens, sharpener. In reality, there will be a half-broken pencil, a rubber with another child’s name on it and some play dough that’s gone hard.
This requires stocking up on items that will end up in their friend’s pencil case by the end of the first week.
The return of the routine
While some parents mourn the end of the holidays as time they will no longer be spending together, I for one welcome the new term with a haka-like victory dance I perform on the doorstep as I wave goodbye, because it means the return of the routine.
Gone are the requests for snacks every 45 minutes, the “I’m bored” face plants onto the sofa and the endless amount of plumbing the depths of my brain for suggestions of things to do, which don’t involve watching TV or iPads.
Because with term time, comes the beautiful structure of the packed lunches, the charged iPads, the first-day photos, the new friends they’ll make, and, most importantly, the being out of the house for eight hours each day so I can finally get my work done in peace.
Oh, and get round to paying the school fees, of course.
Mountain%20Boy
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Charlie Preston (captain) – goal shooter/ goalkeeper (Dubai College)
Arushi Holt (vice-captain) – wing defence / centre (Jumeriah English Speaking School)
Olivia Petricola (vice-captain) – centre / wing attack (Dubai English Speaking College)
Isabel Affley – goalkeeper / goal defence (Dubai English Speaking College)
Jemma Eley – goal attack / wing attack (Dubai College)
Alana Farrell-Morton – centre / wing / defence / wing attack (Nord Anglia International School)
Molly Fuller – goal attack / wing attack (Dubai College)
Caitlin Gowdy – goal defence / wing defence (Dubai English Speaking College)
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Zahra Hussain-Gillani – goal defence / goalkeeper (British School Al Khubairat)
Claire Janssen – goal shooter / goal attack (Jumeriah English Speaking School)
Eliza Petricola – wing attack / centre (Dubai English Speaking College)
Citadel: Honey Bunny first episode
Directors: Raj & DK
Stars: Varun Dhawan, Samantha Ruth Prabhu, Kashvi Majmundar, Kay Kay Menon
Rating: 4/5
Specs
Engine: 51.5kW electric motor
Range: 400km
Power: 134bhp
Torque: 175Nm
Price: From Dh98,800
Available: Now
Company profile
Name: Steppi
Founders: Joe Franklin and Milos Savic
Launched: February 2020
Size: 10,000 users by the end of July and a goal of 200,000 users by the end of the year
Employees: Five
Based: Jumeirah Lakes Towers, Dubai
Financing stage: Two seed rounds – the first sourced from angel investors and the founders' personal savings
Second round raised Dh720,000 from silent investors in June this year
Sheer grandeur
The Owo building is 14 storeys high, seven of which are below ground, with the 30,000 square feet of amenities located subterranean, including a 16-seat private cinema, seven lounges, a gym, games room, treatment suites and bicycle storage.
A clear distinction between the residences and the Raffles hotel with the amenities operated separately.
MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – FINAL RECKONING
Director: Christopher McQuarrie
Starring: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Simon Pegg
Rating: 4/5
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Euro 2020 qualifier
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The five pillars of Islam
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How being social media savvy can improve your well being
Next time when procastinating online remember that you can save thousands on paying for a personal trainer and a gym membership simply by watching YouTube videos and keeping up with the latest health tips and trends.
As social media apps are becoming more and more consumed by health experts and nutritionists who are using it to awareness and encourage patients to engage in physical activity.
Elizabeth Watson, a personal trainer from Stay Fit gym in Abu Dhabi suggests that “individuals can use social media as a means of keeping fit, there are a lot of great exercises you can do and train from experts at home just by watching videos on YouTube”.
Norlyn Torrena, a clinical nutritionist from Burjeel Hospital advises her clients to be more technologically active “most of my clients are so engaged with their phones that I advise them to download applications that offer health related services”.
Torrena said that “most people believe that dieting and keeping fit is boring”.
However, by using social media apps keeping fit means that people are “modern and are kept up to date with the latest heath tips and trends”.
“It can be a guide to a healthy lifestyle and exercise if used in the correct way, so I really encourage my clients to download health applications” said Mrs Torrena.
People can also connect with each other and exchange “tips and notes, it’s extremely healthy and fun”.
So what is Spicy Chickenjoy?
Just as McDonald’s has the Big Mac, Jollibee has Spicy Chickenjoy – a piece of fried chicken that’s crispy and spicy on the outside and comes with a side of spaghetti, all covered in tomato sauce and topped with sausage slices and ground beef. It sounds like a recipe that a child would come up with, but perhaps that’s the point – a flavourbomb combination of cheap comfort foods. Chickenjoy is Jollibee’s best-selling product in every country in which it has a presence.