Robert Matthews
If you’ve got a swimming pool, take extra care this month. No silly dives, running round the edge or other tomfoolery. In fact, you might want to think about draining the pool and covering it over.
The reason: Nicolas Cage has some new movies coming out over the coming months.
Say what? Why on earth should a spate of releases featuring the famously hardworking Hollywood star have any bearing on swimming-pool safety?
Who knows – but the statistics are clear. An analysis of a decade of data by Harvard criminology student Tyler Vigen has revealed a clear correlation between the number of movies Cage appears in each year and the number of people who drown in their swimming-pools.
And it doesn’t seem to be a fluke, either: detailed analysis shows the correlation is statistically significant. Many scientists would take that as pretty good evidence that we’re not dealing with random chance.
Before all this gets traction on social media (or Cage calls his lawyers), it should be made clear that it’s all true – and all baloney.
That may sound paradoxical, and it highlights a problem in the use of statistics. There really is a clear, strong and statistically significant correlation between Mr Cage’s annual output and deaths by falling into swimming pools (at least, in the US). And there is also no reason whatever for believing it to be true.
There is every reason for Mr Vigen winning an award for the most entertaining demonstration of one of the most important lessons in statistical science: correlation is not causation.
Hardly a week goes by without headlines proclaiming some “correlation” between one thing and another. Some of these make sense. There is, for example, a correlation between lung-cancer risk and number of cigarettes smoked.
But statisticians routinely warn against mistaking mere correlation for a genuine, causative connection.
So to keep us all on the path of righteousness, Mr Vigen has devised software that trawls the web for ridiculous correlations between random data-sets.
Some of the more entertaining ones now appear on his personal website Spurious Correlations. They include correlations between divorce rates and per capita consumption of margarine, sales of German cars in the US and suicides by car-crashing, and consumption of cheese and death by getting tangled in bedsheets.
But there’s a problem. Clearly only the most statistically naive would believe in a link between, say, the age of Miss America and murders involving a source of heat (another found by Mr Vigen’s software).
Yet it’s really hard to avoid trying to find some sense in some of the others.
Could it be, for example, that the correlation between divorce rates and margarine reflects the financial hardship caused by divorce, which thus drives people to buy marg instead of butter?
Or perhaps the correlation between cheese and “death by bedsheet” is proof of the age-old belief that eating cheese at night causes restless sleep – with potentially lethal results?
The trouble is, standard statistics doesn’t really have a good way of dealing with such possibilities.
When a correlation emerges from data, researchers typically test only for the possibility it’s just the result of random fluke.
To do that, they perform a so-called significance test.
This takes into account the size of the data-set (the bigger, the stronger the evidence), and the strength of the correlation, measured by the “correlation coefficient”, which ranges from zero (no discernable pattern) to plus or minus one (perfect correlation or anti-correlation).
Plugged into a formula, these two figures give a so-called p-value, which many researchers think measures the risk of the correlation being just a random fluke. Clearly, the lower this is, the better – and anything below 1 in 20 is regarded as “statistically significant”.
In the case of that crazy link between drownings and Nic Cage movies, the correlation was based on just 11 data points, but had a high correlation coefficient of 0.67. That leads to a p-value of just 1 in 40, making the correlation statistically significant.
Many researchers then assume they’ve ruled out fluke, and so must look to another explanation for the spurious connection.
The most obvious is a so-called “confounder” – that is, some hidden connection lurking within the correlation, making it seem real.
For example, you can bet that the number of sunburn cases is correlated to tanning lotion sales. Yet tanning lotion patently doesn’t cause sunburn; the correlation is caused by the hidden (if obvious) confounder: intense sunlight.
This leads statisticians to suggest confounding as an explanation for some crazy correlation.
There’s no test to prove one exists, however. And in many cases – such as the link between drownings and Nic Cage movies – mere fluke still seems the most plausible cause.
Which kind of leaves us nowhere – until one learns that, contrary to what many scientists think, p-values aren’t very good at spotting fluke results.
Put simply, p-values assume the observed effect really is a fluke. As such, they can’t also be used to test if that assumption is valid – which, unfortunately, is just the question we want answered.
Worse still, using p-values in this way tends to underestimate the risk of falling for a random fluke when the finding is inherently implausible.
Statisticians have issued warnings about this for decades, seemingly with little impact. As a result, the research literature in many disciplines is shot through with “statistically significant” correlations every bit as spurious as the idea that we should avoid swimming pools when Nic Cage has a movie out.
Mr Vigen’s treasure trove of statistical silliness is undoubtedly entertaining. But it highlights serious issues about understanding correlations that have been ignored for far too long.
newsdesk@thenational.ae
Robert Matthews is visiting reader in science at Aston University, Birmingham
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Real estate tokenisation project
Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.
The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.
Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.
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Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
EMERGENCY PHONE NUMBERS
Estijaba – 8001717 – number to call to request coronavirus testing
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The White Lotus: Season three
Creator: Mike White
Starring: Walton Goggins, Jason Isaacs, Natasha Rothwell
Rating: 4.5/5
A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
The specs
Engine: 8.0-litre, quad-turbo 16-cylinder
Transmission: 7-speed auto
0-100kmh 2.3 seconds
0-200kmh 5.5 seconds
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Price: Dh13,400,000
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Tips for job-seekers
- Do not submit your application through the Easy Apply button on LinkedIn. Employers receive between 600 and 800 replies for each job advert on the platform. If you are the right fit for a job, connect to a relevant person in the company on LinkedIn and send them a direct message.
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Director: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham, Rachel Szor, Hamdan Ballal
Stars: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham
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ULTRA PROCESSED FOODS
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The smuggler
Eldarir had arrived at JFK in January 2020 with three suitcases, containing goods he valued at $300, when he was directed to a search area.
Officers found 41 gold artefacts among the bags, including amulets from a funerary set which prepared the deceased for the afterlife.
Also found was a cartouche of a Ptolemaic king on a relief that was originally part of a royal building or temple.
The largest single group of items found in Eldarir’s cases were 400 shabtis, or figurines.
Khouli conviction
Khouli smuggled items into the US by making false declarations to customs about the country of origin and value of the items.
According to Immigration and Customs Enforcement, he provided “false provenances which stated that [two] Egyptian antiquities were part of a collection assembled by Khouli's father in Israel in the 1960s” when in fact “Khouli acquired the Egyptian antiquities from other dealers”.
He was sentenced to one year of probation, six months of home confinement and 200 hours of community service in 2012 after admitting buying and smuggling Egyptian antiquities, including coffins, funerary boats and limestone figures.
For sale
A number of other items said to come from the collection of Ezeldeen Taha Eldarir are currently or recently for sale.
Their provenance is described in near identical terms as the British Museum shabti: bought from Salahaddin Sirmali, "authenticated and appraised" by Hossen Rashed, then imported to the US in 1948.
- An Egyptian Mummy mask dating from 700BC-30BC, is on offer for £11,807 ($15,275) online by a seller in Mexico
- A coffin lid dating back to 664BC-332BC was offered for sale by a Colorado-based art dealer, with a starting price of $65,000
- A shabti that was on sale through a Chicago-based coin dealer, dating from 1567BC-1085BC, is up for $1,950
Moon Music
Artist: Coldplay
Label: Parlophone/Atlantic
Number of tracks: 10
Rating: 3/5