At the start of April 2012, I noticed that Montpellier were leading Ligue 1 in France, ahead of big-spending PSG despite having the 13th highest budget in the league.
Montpellier had never won the title and a look at the calendar showed they would play champions Lille, with Eden Hazard, on May 13. I booked a few days in France’s eighth biggest city to witness the event.
At the time, Manchester United were eight points clear in the Premier League and the title would likely be won either against Everton, Manchester City or Swansea. I’d be at all three.
That was my wildly incorrect assumption which saw me rule out a trip to Sunderland on the final game of the season for what I assumed would be a dead rubber. It would be far better to be in Montpellier.
What happened next was that United started dropping points. A 1-0 defeat to Wigan on April 11, a 4-4 draw at home to a buzzing Everton team.
United’s failure to beat Everton didn’t just cost United, it gave rivals hope. They thought United had gone and they were right.
Crucially, a 1-0 defeat at City in a critical Manchester derby followed. And with that, I felt the league was lost, but I’d made my plans and had to stick to them.
The train pulled into Montpellier at 1pm on Sunday afternoon. I’d Googled an Irish bar which would be showing United’s game, which I’d watch in hope but little expectation of winning the league.
There were four other people inside the city’s old town when the games kicked off.
City were on one screen in English at home to QPR, United away in Sunderland in French on another. I watched United but kept swivelling around.
Always the optimist, my hopes started to rise almost from the first minute as City didn’t score when they needed to.
Wayne Rooney’s goal brought relief, but that was secondary to what was happening at the Etihad. When City went ahead, what sliver of hope I had was crushed.
A West African lad came and sat next to me with his girlfriend. His ‘oohs and aahs’ told me he was United. I liked him.
A Turkish man with slicked back hair in a United shirt came in while expats and students started to fill the place. They hadn’t gone there to watch football, but they slowly found themselves transfixed by events on the two screens in the corner.
And then it happened. QPR equalised. Djibril Cisse, 48 minutes. I celebrated that more than any Manchester United goal all season. Sad, eh?
Joey Barton then ruined it by getting sent off. The Liverpudlian former City player was influencing the outcome of the Premier League. Or was he?
No. QPR scored again. Jamie Mackie, 66 minutes. I started to dream the impossible. Which United fan didn’t? I danced alone in a room I’d never been in before, a pathetic spectacle. Other customers looked at me as if I was a mad man as I shouted: “Come on United! Come on!”
Crying City fans came on television and I laughed out loud. This was so City, to come so close and yet fail. They even had a book called Cups for Cock-ups.
City were about to fail and lose the league to United, when they all thought they had won it. This was going to hilarious and triumphant.
The room continued to fill. A group of students who were United came in – they were loving it and danced around too. I was more than happy for them.
I prayed for Manchester City not to score. I’m a hypocrite who only prays in the darkest hour – and not for mere outcomes of football games. And now I was praying out loud for City not to score a goal. Praying for the clock to speed up.
Not watching Manchester United in front of my eyes, but twisting awkwardly until my back hurt to see City in the other corner without ever wanting to watch City over United. Seconds lasted for minutes.
“If we get to 75 minutes we’ll be alright,” I say to nobody in particular. “80 and we’ll be fine.”
It was back to the screen and hoping that QPR would somehow keep possession.
“85 minutes and the title is ours,” I thought, never for one minute thinking that Sunderland would score against United. That game was over and done, even when it wasn’t.
I didn’t really start to believe until 85 minutes. Properly believe that Manchester United were going to win the league. That’s when I made the mistake of relaxing and enjoying it.
“You from Manchester?” asked another United fan before embracing me. United were going to win the league and my only regret – a big one too – was that I wasn’t there to see it. I didn’t expect a final twist, let alone four twists at games I’d been at.
And then it happened. City scored. Didn’t see it. Don’t know who scored it. Still don’t. The next few minutes were a haze. I remember the Irish landlord smiling at me sympathetically.
They scored again. Sergio Aguero wasn’t it? The places erupted, neutrals as opposed to City astonished by what they were seeing. They were happy for City.
Head in bits, I rolled my newspaper up, slipped through the crowd and out of the door into the bright sunlight and a near deserted old town.
My head was, in Mancunian parlance, battered. I felt like I’d just had the high point and low point of the year crushed into half an hour – but I was in Montpellier to do a job.
I walked and walked. Past churches and ancient squares full of beautiful European students listening to the lulling of live music.
I was annoyed with myself for letting it get to me like this. I was 38, not eight. I was a sensible father and a husband.
I could count on my hand the number of times I’d genuinely been floored when Manchester United lost a game: West Ham in 1992 and Anfield a few days later, Barca 4 United 0 and Rome in 2009. Other games may have been more obviously sickened to some, but that’s how I felt.
My Blue brother-in-law texted the results. He was inside the Etihad. As if I wouldn’t know. More text messages (remember them?) arrived from Reds in Sunderland. Their mood reflected mine.
An hour later I was outside Montpellier’s ground, where the party atmosphere was at odds with my foul mood.
Raffish kids from the nearby estates hounded ticket touts, men sipped from bottles and chanted Montpellier songs.
It would be the first full house at the 32,000 capacity stadium since France ’98. I had to speak to strangers, to get quotes for a story.
When they found out I was from Manchester they all said: “We just watched the games!” Reminders in every conversation. Montpellier won the title.
Football, eh? It’s why we love it, but on days like that Sunday, it’s why we hate it too. And now, eight years on from that afternoon, it’s why we miss it.
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Killing of Qassem Suleimani
How to vote
Canadians living in the UAE can register to vote online and be added to the International Register of Electors.
They'll then be sent a special ballot voting kit by mail either to their address, the Consulate General of Canada to the UAE in Dubai or The Embassy of Canada in Abu Dhabi
Registered voters mark the ballot with their choice and must send it back by 6pm Eastern time on October 21 (2am next Friday)
No.6 Collaborations Project
Ed Sheeran (Atlantic)
Pharaoh's curse
British aristocrat Lord Carnarvon, who funded the expedition to find the Tutankhamun tomb, died in a Cairo hotel four months after the crypt was opened.
He had been in poor health for many years after a car crash, and a mosquito bite made worse by a shaving cut led to blood poisoning and pneumonia.
Reports at the time said Lord Carnarvon suffered from “pain as the inflammation affected the nasal passages and eyes”.
Decades later, scientists contended he had died of aspergillosis after inhaling spores of the fungus aspergillus in the tomb, which can lie dormant for months. The fact several others who entered were also found dead withiin a short time led to the myth of the curse.
RESULTS
6pm: Mazrat Al Ruwayah – Group 2 (PA) $40,000 (Dirt) 1,600m
Winner: AF Alajaj, Tadhg O’Shea (jockey), Ernst Oertel (trainer)
6.35pm: Race of Future – Handicap (TB) $80,000 (Turf) 2,410m
Winner: Global Storm, William Buick, Charlie Appleby
7.10pm: UAE 2000 Guineas – Group 3 (TB) $150,000 (D) 1,600m
Winner: Azure Coast, Antonio Fresu, Pavel Vashchenko
7.45pm: Business Bay Challenge – Listed (TB) $100,000 (T) 1,400m
Winner: Storm Damage, Patrick Cosgrave, Saeed bin Suroor
20.20pm: Curlin Stakes – Listed (TB) $100,000 (D) 2,000m
Winner: Appreciated, Fernando Jara, Doug O’Neill
8.55pm: Singspiel Stakes – Group 2 (TB) $180,000 (T) 1,800m
Winner: Lord Glitters, Daniel Tudhope, David O'Meara
9.30pm: Al Shindagha Sprint – Group 3 (TB) $150,000 (D) 1,200m
Winner: Meraas, Antonio Fresu, Musabah Al Muhairi
Specs%20
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Benefits of first-time home buyers' scheme
- Priority access to new homes from participating developers
- Discounts on sales price of off-plan units
- Flexible payment plans from developers
- Mortgages with better interest rates, faster approval times and reduced fees
- DLD registration fee can be paid through banks or credit cards at zero interest rates
Gothia Cup 2025
4,872 matches
1,942 teams
116 pitches
76 nations
26 UAE teams
15 Lebanese teams
2 Kuwaiti teams
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
JOKE'S%20ON%20YOU
%3Cp%3EGoogle%20wasn't%20new%20to%20busting%20out%20April%20Fool's%20jokes%3A%20before%20the%20Gmail%20%22prank%22%2C%20it%20tricked%20users%20with%20%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Farchive.google%2Fmentalplex%2F%22%20target%3D%22_blank%22%3Emind-reading%20MentalPlex%20responses%3C%2Fa%3E%20and%20said%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Farchive.google%2Fpigeonrank%2F%22%20target%3D%22_blank%22%3E%20well-fed%20pigeons%20were%20running%20its%20search%20engine%20operations%3C%2Fa%3E%20.%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EIn%20subsequent%20years%2C%20they%20announced%20home%20internet%20services%20through%20your%20toilet%20with%20its%20%22%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Farchive.google%2Ftisp%2Finstall.html%22%20target%3D%22_blank%22%3Epatented%20GFlush%20system%3C%2Fa%3E%22%2C%20made%20us%20believe%20the%20Moon's%20surface%20was%20made%20of%20cheese%20and%20unveiled%20a%20dating%20service%20in%20which%20they%20called%20founders%20Sergey%20Brin%20and%20Larry%20Page%20%22%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Farchive.google%2Fromance%2Fpress.html%22%20target%3D%22_blank%22%3EStanford%20PhD%20wannabes%3C%2Fa%3E%20%22.%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EBut%20Gmail%20was%20all%20too%20real%2C%20purportedly%20inspired%20by%20one%20%E2%80%93%20a%20single%20%E2%80%93%20Google%20user%20complaining%20about%20the%20%22poor%20quality%20of%20existing%20email%20services%22%20and%20born%20%22%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Fgooglepress.blogspot.com%2F2004%2F04%2Fgoogle-gets-message-launches-gmail.html%22%20target%3D%22_blank%22%3Emillions%20of%20M%26amp%3BMs%20later%3C%2Fa%3E%22.%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Key facilities
- Olympic-size swimming pool with a split bulkhead for multi-use configurations, including water polo and 50m/25m training lanes
- Premier League-standard football pitch
- 400m Olympic running track
- NBA-spec basketball court with auditorium
- 600-seat auditorium
- Spaces for historical and cultural exploration
- An elevated football field that doubles as a helipad
- Specialist robotics and science laboratories
- AR and VR-enabled learning centres
- Disruption Lab and Research Centre for developing entrepreneurial skills
Specs
Engine: Dual-motor all-wheel-drive electric
Range: Up to 610km
Power: 905hp
Torque: 985Nm
Price: From Dh439,000
Available: Now
Manchester City transfers:
OUTS
Pablo Zabaleta, Bacary Sagna, Gael Clichy, Willy Caballero and Jesus Navas (all released)
INS
Ederson (Benfica) £34.7m, Bernardo Silva (Monaco) £43m
ON THEIR WAY OUT?
Joe Hart, Eliaquim Mangala, Samir Nasri, Wilfried Bony, Fabian Delph, Nolito and Kelechi Iheanacho
ON THEIR WAY IN?
Dani Alves (Juventus), Alexis Sanchez (Arsenal)
COMPANY%20PROFILE
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%20name%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Sav%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%202021%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Purvi%20Munot%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dubai%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EIndustry%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20FinTech%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFunding%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20%24750%2C000%20as%20of%20March%202023%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Angel%20investors%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Where to donate in the UAE
The Emirates Charity Portal
You can donate to several registered charities through a “donation catalogue”. The use of the donation is quite specific, such as buying a fan for a poor family in Niger for Dh130.
The General Authority of Islamic Affairs & Endowments
The site has an e-donation service accepting debit card, credit card or e-Dirham, an electronic payment tool developed by the Ministry of Finance and First Abu Dhabi Bank.
Al Noor Special Needs Centre
You can donate online or order Smiles n’ Stuff products handcrafted by Al Noor students. The centre publishes a wish list of extras needed, starting at Dh500.
Beit Al Khair Society
Beit Al Khair Society has the motto “From – and to – the UAE,” with donations going towards the neediest in the country. Its website has a list of physical donation sites, but people can also contribute money by SMS, bank transfer and through the hotline 800-22554.
Dar Al Ber Society
Dar Al Ber Society, which has charity projects in 39 countries, accept cash payments, money transfers or SMS donations. Its donation hotline is 800-79.
Dubai Cares
Dubai Cares provides several options for individuals and companies to donate, including online, through banks, at retail outlets, via phone and by purchasing Dubai Cares branded merchandise. It is currently running a campaign called Bookings 2030, which allows people to help change the future of six underprivileged children and young people.
Emirates Airline Foundation
Those who travel on Emirates have undoubtedly seen the little donation envelopes in the seat pockets. But the foundation also accepts donations online and in the form of Skywards Miles. Donated miles are used to sponsor travel for doctors, surgeons, engineers and other professionals volunteering on humanitarian missions around the world.
Emirates Red Crescent
On the Emirates Red Crescent website you can choose between 35 different purposes for your donation, such as providing food for fasters, supporting debtors and contributing to a refugee women fund. It also has a list of bank accounts for each donation type.
Gulf for Good
Gulf for Good raises funds for partner charity projects through challenges, like climbing Kilimanjaro and cycling through Thailand. This year’s projects are in partnership with Street Child Nepal, Larchfield Kids, the Foundation for African Empowerment and SOS Children's Villages. Since 2001, the organisation has raised more than $3.5 million (Dh12.8m) in support of over 50 children’s charities.
Noor Dubai Foundation
Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum launched the Noor Dubai Foundation a decade ago with the aim of eliminating all forms of preventable blindness globally. You can donate Dh50 to support mobile eye camps by texting the word “Noor” to 4565 (Etisalat) or 4849 (du).
Illegal%20shipments%20intercepted%20in%20Gulf%20region
%3Cp%3EThe%20Royal%20Navy%20raid%20is%20the%20latest%20in%20a%20series%20of%20successful%20interceptions%20of%20drugs%20and%20arms%20in%20the%20Gulf%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMay%2011%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EUS%20coastguard%20recovers%20%2480%20million%20heroin%20haul%20from%20fishing%20vessel%20in%20Gulf%20of%20Oman%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMay%208%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20US%20coastguard%20vessel%20USCGC%20Glen%20Harris%20seizes%20heroin%20and%20meth%20worth%20more%20than%20%2430%20million%20from%20a%20fishing%20boat%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMarch%202%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Anti-tank%20guided%20missiles%20and%20missile%20components%20seized%20by%20HMS%20Lancaster%20from%20a%20small%20boat%20travelling%20from%20Iran%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EOctober%209%2C%202022%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ERoyal%20Navy%20frigate%20HMS%20Montrose%20recovers%20drugs%20worth%20%2417.8%20million%20from%20a%20dhow%20in%20Arabian%20Sea%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ESeptember%2027%2C%202022%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20US%20Naval%20Forces%20Central%20Command%20reports%20a%20find%20of%202.4%20tonnes%20of%20heroin%20on%20board%20fishing%20boat%20in%20Gulf%20of%20Oman%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League last-16, second leg:
Real Madrid 1 (Asensio 70'), Ajax 4 (Ziyech 7', Neres 18', Tadic 62', Schone 72')
Ajax win 5-3 on aggregate
Honeymoonish
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The%20trailblazers
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COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Xpanceo
Started: 2018
Founders: Roman Axelrod, Valentyn Volkov
Based: Dubai, UAE
Industry: Smart contact lenses, augmented/virtual reality
Funding: $40 million
Investor: Opportunity Venture (Asia)
Company%20profile%20
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EName%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EYodawy%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Egypt%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounders%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EKarim%20Khashaba%2C%20Sherief%20El-Feky%20and%20Yasser%20AbdelGawad%3Cstrong%3E%3Cbr%3ESector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EHealthTech%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETotal%20funding%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E%2424.5%20million%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAlgebra%20Ventures%2C%20Global%20Ventures%2C%20MEVP%20and%20Delivery%20Hero%20Ventures%2C%20among%20others%3Cstrong%3E%3Cbr%3ENumber%20of%20employees%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20500%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
Ferrari 12Cilindri specs
Engine: naturally aspirated 6.5-liter V12
Power: 819hp
Torque: 678Nm at 7,250rpm
Price: From Dh1,700,000
Available: Now
McLaren GT specs
Engine: 4-litre twin-turbo V8
Transmission: seven-speed
Power: 620bhp
Torque: 630Nm
Price: Dh875,000
On sale: now
THE SPECS
Engine: 3.6-litre V6
Transmission: eight-speed automatic
Power: 285bhp
Torque: 353Nm
Price: TBA
On sale: Q2, 2020
PREMIER LEAGUE STATS
Romelu Lukaku's goalscoring statistics in the Premier League
Season/club/appearances (substitute)/goals
2011/12 Chelsea: 8(7) - 0
2012/13 West Brom (loan): 35(15) - 17
2013/14 Chelsea: 2(2) - 0
2013/14 Everton (loan): 31(2) - 15
2014/15 Everton: 36(4) - 10
2015/16 Everton: 37(1) - 18
2016/17 Everton: 37(1) - 25
The%20Last%20White%20Man
%3Cp%3EAuthor%3A%20Mohsin%20Hamid%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E192%20pages%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPublished%20by%3A%20Hamish%20Hamilton%20(UK)%2C%20Riverhead%20Books%20(US)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3ERelease%20date%3A%20out%20now%20in%20the%20US%2C%20August%2011%20(UK)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
DUBAI CARNIVAL RESULTS
6.30pm Handicap US$135,000 (Turf) 2,410m
Winner Dubai Future, Harry Bentley (jockey), Saeed bin Suroor (trainer).
7.05pm UAE 1000 Guineas Listed $250,000 (Dirt) 1,600m
Winner Dubai Love, Patrick Cosgrave, Saeed bin Suroor.
7.40pm Dubai Dash Listed $175,000 (T) 1,000m
Winner: Equilateral, James Doyle, Charles Hills.
8.15pm Al Bastakiya Trial Conditions $100,000 (D) 1.900m
Winner Laser Show, Kevin Stott, Saeed bin Suroor.
8.50pm Al Fahidi Fort Group Two $250,000 (T) 1,400m
Winner Glorious Journey, James Doyle, Charlie Appleby.
9.25pm Handicap $135,000 (D) 2,000m
Winner George Villiers, Tadhg O’Shea, Satish Seemar.
WOMAN AND CHILD
Director: Saeed Roustaee
Starring: Parinaz Izadyar, Payman Maadi
Rating: 4/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
The specs
AT4 Ultimate, as tested
Engine: 6.2-litre V8
Power: 420hp
Torque: 623Nm
Transmission: 10-speed automatic
Price: From Dh330,800 (Elevation: Dh236,400; AT4: Dh286,800; Denali: Dh345,800)
On sale: Now
Roll%20of%20Honour%2C%20men%E2%80%99s%20domestic%20rugby%20season
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The essentials
What: Emirates Airline Festival of Literature
When: Friday until March 9
Where: All main sessions are held in the InterContinental Dubai Festival City
Price: Sessions range from free entry to Dh125 tickets, with the exception of special events.
Hot Tip: If waiting for your book to be signed looks like it will be timeconsuming, ask the festival’s bookstore if they have pre-signed copies of the book you’re looking for. They should have a bunch from some of the festival’s biggest guest authors.
Information: www.emirateslitfest.com
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