Last month I lost my father. As in the case of so many fathers like him who don’t capture the headlines, it is unlikely that you will find his name in history books. And yet they are the men who have built societies and made us. In many ways, and especially for me, he embodied the history of the last tumultuous century.
After losing my mum just 15 months ago, I am now, in technical terms, an orphan. At a personal level this is life changing and the grief that comes with it is not to be underestimated. Particularly as it is interwoven with the grief of the end of the journey of more than a decade of being a carer for them both. But I am also mindful that in these dark painful days of my own bereavement, I am still fortunate to have had them with me till their old age; especially when there are children who are being orphaned from not just their parents but entire family networks. It is sobering, for example, to think of the heartrending acronym WCNSF being used in Gaza for "wounded child no surviving family."
I am not the first and I will not be the last to lose my father. And yet while my loss expands to fill up my universe, it also speaks to a much larger human experience: the impact of fatherhood.
In the days following my father's passing, I’ve been writing and publishing his story. And that feels important: not just for me, but as a service to all fathers and to fatherhood. Theirs are often untold unknown stories – even for their own families whom they have nurtured and elevated.
It can seem like our world is being increasingly poisoned by ideas of toxic masculinity that are harmful to both women and men. Algorithms and disinformation can make such stories flood our social conversations faster than the rarely told stories experienced by so many of us who are or have been lucky enough to have had fathers as their biggest champions.
When it comes to changing the narratives and archetypes of fatherhood in the public domain, we need to start sharing stories of role models, the humanity, the quiet successes that so many of us are blessed to come from. Which means we need to capture and reframe what it means to be a man and a father, by celebrating and documenting their lives.
More from Shelina Janmohamed
For someone like me, this feels particularly acute because this is an era in which Muslim men are frequently vilified as violent and as suppressing women, where immigrants are often the "other". And yet it is my father, my Muslim Asian immigrant father, who has made me the woman I am, encouraged me to be independent, soft-hearted and to work hard to make the world better, while still finding joy in people and places.
He was the one who encouraged me to have a voice, take hold of my own power and stand on my own feet. We must reinvigorate the humanising of Muslim men by telling their stories that make our lives better and make us who we are.
My father was also the embodiment of the immigrant story: his father travelled from Kutch in India, and settled in Tanzania after having worked as a businessman in the British Empire port of Aden, in today’s Yemen. The small town called Mingoyo in Tanzania was on the tectonic plates of history as German rule was eclipsed by the British and the latter’s commerce grew trade as well as its occupation of the region, and whose withdrawal post independence led to my father following his British passport to the UK. He had looked around at post-independence states and assessed Britain to be the right option for him.
His immigrant story is nothing like the hateful caricatures used to demonise today’s migrants
Like many children of immigrants, my father’s decisions have shaped my life in ways that counterfactuals mean I could have grown up in so many different places and led a different life.
But even though I wasn’t born until many years later, having spent time sitting with him and hearing his stories, I know that he made those decisions with a view to not just that old cliche of giving his family the best lives possible, but also where he felt he could contribute.
He arrived in the UK with £75 and was part of a post-war generation that helped to re-build Britain. My parents through their work and talent contributed to society, to the economy and brought up a family which now works to do the same.
His immigrant story is nothing like the hateful caricatures used to demonise today’s migrants. Having published his story, many have reached out to me to say they wept and felt pride at seeing the story of a father like their own.
None of this is to deny the sad and painful reality that there are so many fathers who are absent, violent, abusive and harmful. But we need stories to showcase that there are other ways to live, because otherwise how can we ever know and apply models of successful fatherhood that are all around us and hiding in plain sight, to our own lives.
Our fathers don’t have to have been celebrities or prime ministers in order for us to tell their priceless stories. They are powerful because they built the lives of their families and contributed to upholding societies.
We need more stories of our fathers to shine a light on a kind of masculinity we hear little about. Each of their lives will have injected magic and strength into multiple lives. And sharing their stories means not just establishing a legacy for them, it means inspiring a whole new generation.
It’s the least that we owe our fathers.
TEACHERS' PAY - WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
Pay varies significantly depending on the school, its rating and the curriculum. Here's a rough guide as of January 2021:
- top end schools tend to pay Dh16,000-17,000 a month - plus a monthly housing allowance of up to Dh6,000. These tend to be British curriculum schools rated 'outstanding' or 'very good', followed by American schools
- average salary across curriculums and skill levels is about Dh10,000, recruiters say
- it is becoming more common for schools to provide accommodation, sometimes in an apartment block with other teachers, rather than hand teachers a cash housing allowance
- some strong performing schools have cut back on salaries since the pandemic began, sometimes offering Dh16,000 including the housing allowance, which reflects the slump in rental costs, and sheer demand for jobs
- maths and science teachers are most in demand and some schools will pay up to Dh3,000 more than other teachers in recognition of their technical skills
- at the other end of the market, teachers in some Indian schools, where fees are lower and competition among applicants is intense, can be paid as low as Dh3,000 per month
- in Indian schools, it has also become common for teachers to share residential accommodation, living in a block with colleagues
Results
%3Cp%3E%0D%3Cstrong%3EElite%20men%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3E1.%20Amare%20Hailemichael%20Samson%20(ERI)%202%3A07%3A10%0D%3Cbr%3E2.%20Leornard%20Barsoton%20(KEN)%202%3A09%3A37%0D%3Cbr%3E3.%20Ilham%20Ozbilan%20(TUR)%202%3A10%3A16%0D%3Cbr%3E4.%20Gideon%20Chepkonga%20(KEN)%202%3A11%3A17%0D%3Cbr%3E5.%20Isaac%20Timoi%20(KEN)%202%3A11%3A34%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EElite%20women%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3E1.%20Brigid%20Kosgei%20(KEN)%202%3A19%3A15%0D%3Cbr%3E2.%20Hawi%20Feysa%20Gejia%20(ETH)%202%3A24%3A03%0D%3Cbr%3E3.%20Sintayehu%20Dessi%20(ETH)%202%3A25%3A36%0D%3Cbr%3E4.%20Aurelia%20Kiptui%20(KEN)%202%3A28%3A59%0D%3Cbr%3E5.%20Emily%20Kipchumba%20(KEN)%202%3A29%3A52%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Specs
Engine: 51.5kW electric motor
Range: 400km
Power: 134bhp
Torque: 175Nm
Price: From Dh98,800
Available: Now
UAE Falcons
Carly Lewis (captain), Emily Fensome, Kelly Loy, Isabel Affley, Jessica Cronin, Jemma Eley, Jenna Guy, Kate Lewis, Megan Polley, Charlie Preston, Becki Quigley and Sophie Siffre. Deb Jones and Lucia Sdao – coach and assistant coach.
The specs: 2018 Opel Mokka X
Price, as tested: Dh84,000
Engine: 1.4L, four-cylinder turbo
Transmission: Six-speed auto
Power: 142hp at 4,900rpm
Torque: 200Nm at 1,850rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 6.5L / 100km
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
In-demand jobs and monthly salaries
- Technology expert in robotics and automation: Dh20,000 to Dh40,000
- Energy engineer: Dh25,000 to Dh30,000
- Production engineer: Dh30,000 to Dh40,000
- Data-driven supply chain management professional: Dh30,000 to Dh50,000
- HR leader: Dh40,000 to Dh60,000
- Engineering leader: Dh30,000 to Dh55,000
- Project manager: Dh55,000 to Dh65,000
- Senior reservoir engineer: Dh40,000 to Dh55,000
- Senior drilling engineer: Dh38,000 to Dh46,000
- Senior process engineer: Dh28,000 to Dh38,000
- Senior maintenance engineer: Dh22,000 to Dh34,000
- Field engineer: Dh6,500 to Dh7,500
- Field supervisor: Dh9,000 to Dh12,000
- Field operator: Dh5,000 to Dh7,000
((Disclaimer))
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Company Fact Box
Company name/date started: Abwaab Technologies / September 2019
Founders: Hamdi Tabbaa, co-founder and CEO. Hussein Alsarabi, co-founder and CTO
Based: Amman, Jordan
Sector: Education Technology
Size (employees/revenue): Total team size: 65. Full-time employees: 25. Revenue undisclosed
Stage: early-stage startup
Investors: Adam Tech Ventures, Endure Capital, Equitrust, the World Bank-backed Innovative Startups SMEs Fund, a London investment fund, a number of former and current executives from Uber and Netflix, among others.
The 12 breakaway clubs
England
Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United, Tottenham Hotspur
Italy
AC Milan, Inter Milan, Juventus
Spain
Atletico Madrid, Barcelona, Real Madrid
ZAYED SUSTAINABILITY PRIZE
FIXTURES
All times UAE ( 4 GMT)
Saturday
Fiorentina v Torino (8pm)
Hellas Verona v Roma (10.45pm)
Sunday
Parma v Napoli (2.30pm)
Genoa v Crotone (5pm)
Sassuolo v Cagliari (8pm)
Juventus v Sampdoria (10.45pm)
Monday
AC Milan v Bologna (10.45om)
Playing September 30
Benevento v Inter Milan (8pm)
Udinese v Spezia (8pm)
Lazio v Atalanta (10.45pm)
MATCH INFO
What: 2006 World Cup quarter-final
When: July 1
Where: Gelsenkirchen Stadium, Gelsenkirchen, Germany
Result:
England 0 Portugal 0
(Portugal win 3-1 on penalties)
COMPANY%20PROFILE
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Eco%20Way%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20December%202023%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Ivan%20Kroshnyi%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dubai%2C%20UAE%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EIndustry%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Electric%20vehicles%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Bootstrapped%20with%20undisclosed%20funding.%20Looking%20to%20raise%20funds%20from%20outside%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The specs
Engine: 2.2-litre, turbodiesel
Transmission: 6-speed auto
Power: 160hp
Torque: 385Nm
Price: Dh116,900
On sale: now
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: HyperSpace
Started: 2020
Founders: Alexander Heller, Rama Allen and Desi Gonzalez
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: Entertainment
Number of staff: 210
Investment raised: $75 million from investors including Galaxy Interactive, Riyadh Season, Sega Ventures and Apis Venture Partners
In numbers
1,000 tonnes of waste collected daily:
- 800 tonnes converted into alternative fuel
- 150 tonnes to landfill
- 50 tonnes sold as scrap metal
800 tonnes of RDF replaces 500 tonnes of coal
Two conveyor lines treat more than 350,000 tonnes of waste per year
25 staff on site
If you go
The flights
There are various ways of getting to the southern Serengeti in Tanzania from the UAE. The exact route and airstrip depends on your overall trip itinerary and which camp you’re staying at.
Flydubai flies direct from Dubai to Kilimanjaro International Airport from Dh1,350 return, including taxes; this can be followed by a short flight from Kilimanjaro to the Serengeti with Coastal Aviation from about US$700 (Dh2,500) return, including taxes. Kenya Airways, Emirates and Etihad offer flights via Nairobi or Dar es Salaam.
COMPANY PROFILE
Company name: BorrowMe (BorrowMe.com)
Date started: August 2021
Founder: Nour Sabri
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: E-commerce / Marketplace
Size: Two employees
Funding stage: Seed investment
Initial investment: $200,000
Investors: Amr Manaa (director, PwC Middle East)
The specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4cyl turbo
Power: 261hp at 5,500rpm
Torque: 405Nm at 1,750-3,500rpm
Transmission: 9-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 6.9L/100km
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh117,059
Paltan
Producer: JP Films, Zee Studios
Director: JP Dutta
Cast: Jackie Shroff, Sonu Sood, Arjun Rampal, Siddhanth Kapoor, Luv Sinha and Harshvardhan Rane
Rating: 2/5
Key facilities
- Olympic-size swimming pool with a split bulkhead for multi-use configurations, including water polo and 50m/25m training lanes
- Premier League-standard football pitch
- 400m Olympic running track
- NBA-spec basketball court with auditorium
- 600-seat auditorium
- Spaces for historical and cultural exploration
- An elevated football field that doubles as a helipad
- Specialist robotics and science laboratories
- AR and VR-enabled learning centres
- Disruption Lab and Research Centre for developing entrepreneurial skills
SPECS
Nissan 370z Nismo
Engine: 3.7-litre V6
Transmission: seven-speed automatic
Power: 363hp
Torque: 560Nm
Price: Dh184,500
The Pope's itinerary
Sunday, February 3, 2019 - Rome to Abu Dhabi
1pm: departure by plane from Rome / Fiumicino to Abu Dhabi
10pm: arrival at Abu Dhabi Presidential Airport
Monday, February 4
12pm: welcome ceremony at the main entrance of the Presidential Palace
12.20pm: visit Abu Dhabi Crown Prince at Presidential Palace
5pm: private meeting with Muslim Council of Elders at Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque
6.10pm: Inter-religious in the Founder's Memorial
Tuesday, February 5 - Abu Dhabi to Rome
9.15am: private visit to undisclosed cathedral
10.30am: public mass at Zayed Sports City – with a homily by Pope Francis
12.40pm: farewell at Abu Dhabi Presidential Airport
1pm: departure by plane to Rome
5pm: arrival at the Rome / Ciampino International Airport
A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
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KILLING OF QASSEM SULEIMANI
CONFIRMED%20LINE-UP
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Benefits of first-time home buyers' scheme
- Priority access to new homes from participating developers
- Discounts on sales price of off-plan units
- Flexible payment plans from developers
- Mortgages with better interest rates, faster approval times and reduced fees
- DLD registration fee can be paid through banks or credit cards at zero interest rates
