A year ago, at the peak of the unrest at American university campuses over the war in Gaza, I was asked to address a conference on the topic “How to Conduct Civil Discourse”. I relished the opportunity to do this because the issue of how to engage in civil discourse was (and remains) both timely and necessary.
Americans live in a deeply toxic environment in which the political and cultural gaps that separate them appear unbridgeable. Whether in the US’s foreign relations or congressional debates, in its communities or families, people on opposite sides of issues often seem more interested in scoring points than in reaching understanding.
As I began to prepare my remarks, I reflected on four important lessons I learnt from people who have mattered in my life.
In my teens, I confess, I was a bit of a precocious know-it-all. I loved ideas and would argue my beliefs with anyone who crossed my path. One afternoon, my mother and I were visiting an aunt. Before long, my aunt and I became engaged in a debate over the meaning of some New Testament story.
At one point, my mother intervened, telling me: “Stop and look at yourself. You’re sitting on the edge of your seat. You say your piece and the minute your aunt begins to respond, you’re ready to pounce. You don’t listen to a word she’s saying because all you can think of is your rebuttal. If you don’t listen to her, she won’t hear you. Because you’re talking at her and not with her.”
She would also say: “Don’t be wrong at the top of your voice.” Volume isn’t the measure of rightness. Speaking loudly may make you feel good, but because it’s off-putting to those with whom you are conversing, instead of opening ears, it often shuts down conversation.
In the same vein, early in my career, my wife Eileen would come to my speeches and sit at the back of the room, in a place where I could see her. I was young and prone to using incendiary language. When I would step over the line and say something overly harsh or just plain crude, Eileen would wince. Her point was that, while I might think using such language had shock value, in fact, it was at best a distraction, and at worst a turnoff, to many in the audience.
I learnt that if I was trying to convey the pain of a much-beleaguered people, I had the responsibility of speaking to people they would never be able to address. I had to respect the audience I was trying to reach so that they would want to hear my message.
In the aftermath of the 9/11 terrorist attacks, I became aware of the broader applications of these simple lessons in listening and civil discourse. I was invited to serve with a number of foreign policy experts and former elected and appointed government officials on a Council on Foreign Relations task force on public diplomacy. The issue being explored was how to relate to the Arab world in this era. For some of my colleagues, the ideas that were proposed ranged from bombing Iraq to lecturing them on democracy.
About this same time, my brother John and I were asked by foundations in the Arab world to conduct two separate polls: one to examine what Arabs think about their values and concerns, the other to measure Arabs’ attitudes about America.
What we found was that the principal concerns of most Arabs were their families and their futures. They wanted good jobs, quality health care, educational opportunities for their children, and safety and security in their communities. We also learnt that contrary to views widely held by Americans, Arabs liked the US – its people, educational system, products and its culture and values. What they didn’t like was how America treated them.
These results not only helped inform my task force discussions, but also prepared me for meetings with the undersecretaries for public diplomacy in George W Bush’s administration. I had the opportunity to meet each of the people Mr Bush appointed to this post.
The prerequisite for any real communication must be the recognition of the importance of understanding the needs and concerns of the 'other'
When each asked me what I would recommend, I suggested that in their travels to Arab countries they shouldn’t begin by lecturing. Instead, I advised them to ask questions and listen. I would say: “Don’t presume you know what they’re thinking or what they want to hear from you.”
At about this same time, I was invited by Sheikh Abdullah bin Zayed, Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Foreign Affairs, to meet a group of ministers from Gulf countries to discuss how they could help to heal the divide between their region and America. As the meeting progressed, a number of the ministers were critical of US efforts to engage them and had a variety of views as to what they should do to improve their image with Americans.
Through it all, Sheikh Abdullah listened and understood what many of his colleagues did not: Americans didn’t understand Arabs and Arabs didn’t understand Americans. Therefore, despite best intentions, the efforts of both sides would miss the mark.
Reflecting on failed attempts at public diplomacy on both sides, he noted: “You know, in the end, we Arabs will never be able to help Americans understand us unless we understand them first. Similarly, Americans will never succeed in their efforts to communicate to us who they are unless they take the time to know us first.”
That simple lesson must undergird any effort at civil discourse. Where differences exist, the prerequisite for any real communication must be the recognition of the importance of understanding the needs and concerns of the “other”. As the American civil rights activist and politician Rev Jesse Jackson might say: only if I attempt to understand them and directly address them, will they be able to open up to understanding me.
And so, the lessons are simple: listen before you speak, speak softly and avoid harsh rhetoric, respect your audience, and try to speak to their concerns in order to open their minds to hearing you.
SERIE A FIXTURES
Saturday Benevento v Atalanta (2pm), Genoa v Bologna (5pm), AC Milan v Torino (7.45pm)
Sunday Roma v Inter Milan (3.30pm), Udinese v Napoli, Hellas Verona v Crotone, Parma v Lazio (2pm), Fiorentina v Cagliari (9pm), Juventus v Sassuolo (11.45pm)
Monday Spezia v Sampdoria (11.45pm)
THE BIO
Ms Davison came to Dubai from Kerala after her marriage in 1996 when she was 21-years-old
Since 2001, Ms Davison has worked at many affordable schools such as Our Own English High School in Sharjah, and The Apple International School and Amled School in Dubai
Favourite Book: The Alchemist
Favourite quote: Failing to prepare is preparing to fail
Favourite place to Travel to: Vienna
Favourite cuisine: Italian food
Favourite Movie : Scent of a Woman
MATCH INFO
Manchester City 6 Huddersfield Town 1
Man City: Agüero (25', 35', 75'), Jesus (31'), Silva (48'), Kongolo (84' og)
Huddersfield: Stankovic (43')
Five famous companies founded by teens
There are numerous success stories of teen businesses that were created in college dorm rooms and other modest circumstances. Below are some of the most recognisable names in the industry:
- Facebook: Mark Zuckerberg and his friends started Facebook when he was a 19-year-old Harvard undergraduate.
- Dell: When Michael Dell was an undergraduate student at Texas University in 1984, he started upgrading computers for profit. He starting working full-time on his business when he was 19. Eventually, his company became the Dell Computer Corporation and then Dell Inc.
- Subway: Fred DeLuca opened the first Subway restaurant when he was 17. In 1965, Mr DeLuca needed extra money for college, so he decided to open his own business. Peter Buck, a family friend, lent him $1,000 and together, they opened Pete’s Super Submarines. A few years later, the company was rebranded and called Subway.
- Mashable: In 2005, Pete Cashmore created Mashable in Scotland when he was a teenager. The site was then a technology blog. Over the next few decades, Mr Cashmore has turned Mashable into a global media company.
- Oculus VR: Palmer Luckey founded Oculus VR in June 2012, when he was 19. In August that year, Oculus launched its Kickstarter campaign and raised more than $1 million in three days. Facebook bought Oculus for $2 billion two years later.
MO
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Gran Gala del Calcio 2019 winners
Best Player: Cristiano Ronaldo (Juventus)
Best Coach: Gian Piero Gasperini (Atalanta)
Best Referee: Gianluca Rocchi
Best Goal: Fabio Quagliarella (Sampdoria vs Napoli)
Best Team: Atalanta
Best XI: Samir Handanovic (Inter); Aleksandar Kolarov (Roma), Giorgio Chiellini (Juventus), Kalidou Koulibaly (Napoli), Joao Cancelo (Juventus*); Miralem Pjanic (Juventus), Josip Ilicic (Atalanta), Nicolo Barella (Cagliari*); Fabio Quagliarella (Sampdoria), Cristiano Ronaldo (Juventus), Duvan Zapata (Atalanta)
Serie B Best Young Player: Sandro Tonali (Brescia)
Best Women’s Goal: Thaisa (Milan vs Juventus)
Best Women’s Player: Manuela Giugliano (Milan)
Best Women’s XI: Laura Giuliani (Milan); Alia Guagni (Fiorentina), Sara Gama (Juventus), Cecilia Salvai (Juventus), Elisa Bartoli (Roma); Aurora Galli (Juventus), Manuela Giugliano (Roma), Valentina Cernoia (Juventus); Valentina Giacinti (Milan), Ilaria Mauro (Fiorentina), Barbara Bonansea (Juventus)
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
RESULTS
5pm: Maiden (PA) Dh80,000 1,400m
Winner: JAP Almahfuz, Fernando Jara (jockey), Irfan Ellahi (trainer).
5.30pm: Handicap (PA) Dh90,000 1,400m
Winner: AF Momtaz, Antonio Fresu, Musabah Al Muhairi.
6pm: Handicap (TB) Dh100,000 1,400m
Winner: Yaalail, Fernando Jara, Ali Rashid Al Raihe.
6.30pm: Abu Dhabi Championship Listed (PA) Dh180,000 1,600m
Winner: Ihtesham, Szczepan Mazur, Ibrahim Al Hadhrami.
7pm: Wathba Stallions Cup Handicap (PA) Dh70,000 1,600m
Winner: Dahess D’Arabie, Fernando Jara, Helal Al Alawi.
7.30pm: Maiden (PA) Dh80,000 2.200m
Winner: Ezz Al Rawasi, Connor Beasley, Helal Al Alawi.
A list of the animal rescue organisations in the UAE
World Test Championship table
1 India 71 per cent
2 New Zealand 70 per cent
3 Australia 69.2 per cent
4 England 64.1 per cent
5 Pakistan 43.3 per cent
6 West Indies 33.3 per cent
7 South Africa 30 per cent
8 Sri Lanka 16.7 per cent
9 Bangladesh 0
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Global state-owned investor ranking by size
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United States
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2.
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China
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3.
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UAE
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4.
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Japan
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5
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Norway
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Canada
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Singapore
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Australia
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Saudi Arabia
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South Korea
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Zayed Sustainability Prize
Zayed Sustainability Prize
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Indika
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The Details
Kabir Singh
Produced by: Cinestaan Studios, T-Series
Directed by: Sandeep Reddy Vanga
Starring: Shahid Kapoor, Kiara Advani, Suresh Oberoi, Soham Majumdar, Arjun Pahwa
Rating: 2.5/5
Meatless Days
Sara Suleri, with an introduction by Kamila Shamsie
Penguin
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Volvo ES90 Specs
Engine: Electric single motor (96kW), twin motor (106kW) and twin motor performance (106kW)
Power: 333hp, 449hp, 680hp
Torque: 480Nm, 670Nm, 870Nm
On sale: Later in 2025 or early 2026, depending on region
Price: Exact regional pricing TBA
The specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4-cylturbo
Transmission: seven-speed DSG automatic
Power: 242bhp
Torque: 370Nm
Price: Dh136,814
What can you do?
Document everything immediately; including dates, times, locations and witnesses
Seek professional advice from a legal expert
You can report an incident to HR or an immediate supervisor
You can use the Ministry of Human Resources and Emiratisation’s dedicated hotline
In criminal cases, you can contact the police for additional support
If you go
The flights
There are various ways of getting to the southern Serengeti in Tanzania from the UAE. The exact route and airstrip depends on your overall trip itinerary and which camp you’re staying at.
Flydubai flies direct from Dubai to Kilimanjaro International Airport from Dh1,350 return, including taxes; this can be followed by a short flight from Kilimanjaro to the Serengeti with Coastal Aviation from about US$700 (Dh2,500) return, including taxes. Kenya Airways, Emirates and Etihad offer flights via Nairobi or Dar es Salaam.
Third Test
Result: India won by 203 runs
Series: England lead five-match series 2-1
FORSPOKEN
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Diablo%20IV
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Starfield
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57%20Seconds
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Tonight's Chat on The National
Tonight's Chat is a series of online conversations on The National. The series features a diverse range of celebrities, politicians and business leaders from around the Arab world.
Tonight’s Chat host Ricardo Karam is a renowned author and broadcaster who has previously interviewed Bill Gates, Carlos Ghosn, Andre Agassi and the late Zaha Hadid, among others.
Intellectually curious and thought-provoking, Tonight’s Chat moves the conversation forward.
Facebook | Our website | Instagram
Company Profile
Founder: Omar Onsi
Launched: 2018
Employees: 35
Financing stage: Seed round ($12 million)
Investors: B&Y, Phoenician Funds, M1 Group, Shorooq Partners
Men's football draw
Group A: UAE, Spain, South Africa, Jamaica
Group B: Bangladesh, Serbia, Korea
Group C: Bharat, Denmark, Kenya, USA
Group D: Oman, Austria, Rwanda
First Person
Richard Flanagan
Chatto & Windus
Mohammed bin Zayed Majlis
Red flags
- Promises of high, fixed or 'guaranteed' returns.
- Unregulated structured products or complex investments often used to bypass traditional safeguards.
- Lack of clear information, vague language, no access to audited financials.
- Overseas companies targeting investors in other jurisdictions - this can make legal recovery difficult.
- Hard-selling tactics - creating urgency, offering 'exclusive' deals.
Courtesy: Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching
Diriyah%20project%20at%20a%20glance
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Tips for job-seekers
- Do not submit your application through the Easy Apply button on LinkedIn. Employers receive between 600 and 800 replies for each job advert on the platform. If you are the right fit for a job, connect to a relevant person in the company on LinkedIn and send them a direct message.
- Make sure you are an exact fit for the job advertised. If you are an HR manager with five years’ experience in retail and the job requires a similar candidate with five years’ experience in consumer, you should apply. But if you have no experience in HR, do not apply for the job.
David Mackenzie, founder of recruitment agency Mackenzie Jones Middle East
THE DETAILS
Solo: A Star Wars Story
Director: Ron Howard
2/5
