I attended a funeral this week.
Family members gathered from near and far. There were speeches, eulogies, a PowerPoint presentation filled with pictures of happy memories, and wistful anecdotes shared about time spent with the deceased. There was even a musical performance, courtesy of a spirited mother-in-law and her ukelele.
But there was one rather obvious point of difference for this funeral, held as it was in the age of the coronavirus: it all took place through a computer screen.
Zoom funerals can seem 'movie like', flat and a one-dimensional experience which can possibly further complicate grief
As the pandemic has charged across the globe, leaving a trail of incomprehensible change in its wake, grounding flights and closing borders, once straightforward actions are now impossible.
So, for instance, when a family member passes away in New Zealand (my husband's grandfather, in this instance), you simply cannot jump on a plane and rush home to grieve with family and help with funeral arrangements.
Instead, you grieve over WhatsApp messages, phone calls and video calls with family spread out across the world, and arrangements are made for a funeral to be held over our new lifeline: Zoom.
You gather at an ungodly hour to ensure family members in Auckland, New York and Dubai can all be present, and instead of a church or a funeral home, you sit on a couch in your pyjamas. As emotions run high, there is little else you can do but sit. It's strange, disconcerting and can easily feel as if it isn't really happening.
So is this something we need to come to terms with as the "new normal"? And how do we reconcile loss in isolation?
"Just as we are all now adapting to a new way of living, we also need to adapt to a new way of grieving," says Tanya Dharamshi, clinical director and psychologist at Priory Wellbeing Centre in Dubai.
"Many will miss their chance at a final farewell and the chance to say a physical goodbye and this can cause feelings of frustration, helplessness and even anger."
Dharamshi says the "connection" component of a funeral allows people to learn to cope with bereavement, so it's difficult to come to terms with, without having that physical experience.
"Coping with the loss of a loved one can be extremely challenging and emotional at the best of times, but during the current pandemic, these feelings can only be exacerbated, particularly with the overwhelming feeling of isolation.
"Additionally, the thought that our loved ones may have passed in isolation is also difficult to cope with. [And] with the current physical-distancing measures, we are not able to connect physically, leaving many feeling extremely isolated and alone."
Dharamshi says, if not dealt with, these negative feelings can snowball into a period of "prolonged grief", which is "like a form of depression".
In order to avoid this, she says it's important to engage with and communicate with family and loved ones, ensuring regular check-ins with relatives or a simple chat with them to connect on other topics. It's also important to talk about the person who died, sharing memories and moments, and to be kind to yourself.
"Our ability to cope is being greatly tested. Varied coping mechanisms we would previously have relied upon to help us through such a stressful time are simply not possible, we have less physical support and contact with friends and family, much more ‘thinking’ time and fewer distractions to help take our mind off things for even short periods of time, which can help stop grief becoming all-consuming."
Dharamshi says therapeutic activities are key, now more than ever, to help cope with loss. Try reminiscing about happy memories to ensure your loved one is not forgotten, or try writing a letter to say goodbye. A grief journal, where you can spend 15 minutes expressing your emotions in a non-judgemental space is also a good option.
"Appreciate the unprecedented circumstances we are currently living in and acknowledge how you are managing to get through each day. Allow yourself time to feel the emotions and give yourself permission to go through the journey of grief – resist the urge to numb or remove the pain," she says.
The positive side of Zoom funerals
However, there are potential advantages to attending funeral arrangements from afar. Saliha Afridi, clinical psychologist at LightHouse Arabia, says some of their clients had reported that "being in their own home allowed them to access their grief more".
"Because they could cry without feeling self-conscious, they could also deeply connect with the speakers at the funeral because the ‘camera was zoomed in closely’ on their faces and they were not distracted by context and other people." She adds that they also note "that there is still a sense of connectedness experienced with many people gathered to pay their respects in one place".
LightHouse Arabia has seen an increase in grief services during the pandemic, as people experience both "primary and secondary losses".
This means more people with low moods and heightened anxiety, not only from loss – either of a loved one or of other losses caused by the pandemic – but also from residual stress. It has led to the introduction of new, free-of-charge support groups.
Afridi agrees that there is no substitute for in-person funerals, as ones held over Zoom calls can feel "'movie-like', flat and a one-dimensional experience, which can possibly further complicate grief". For that reason, she hopes they will only be relied upon during the pandemic.
"There is no substitute for real-life gatherings and being together in person in a time of loss. Seeing the person who has passed in real life, being with people in your sadness makes the event real and the grief process clearer in your heart and mind.
"However, these platforms provide a substitute in a time when being together is just not an option. I think the scary thought is, what if people just adopt this as a way of doing things in the future? It would further chip away at our humanity that is starting to get compromised by our over reliance on technology."
The specs
Engine: 4.0-litre V8 twin-turbocharged and three electric motors
Power: Combined output 920hp
Torque: 730Nm at 4,000-7,000rpm
Transmission: 8-speed dual-clutch automatic
Fuel consumption: 11.2L/100km
On sale: Now, deliveries expected later in 2025
Price: expected to start at Dh1,432,000
Specs
Engine: Duel electric motors
Power: 659hp
Torque: 1075Nm
On sale: Available for pre-order now
Price: On request
The biog
Name: Greg Heinricks
From: Alberta, western Canada
Record fish: 56kg sailfish
Member of: International Game Fish Association
Company: Arabian Divers and Sportfishing Charters
SPECS
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEngine%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E2.4-litre%204-cylinder%20turbo%20hybrid%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20366hp%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E550Nm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETransmission%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESix-speed%20auto%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20From%20Dh360%2C000%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EAvailable%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ENow%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
More from Rashmee Roshan Lall
Points tally
1. Australia 52; 2. New Zealand 44; 3. South Africa 36; 4. Sri Lanka 35; 5. UAE 27; 6. India 27; 7. England 26; 8. Singapore 8; 9. Malaysia 3
SPEC%20SHEET%3A%20NOTHING%20PHONE%20(2)
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDisplay%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%206.7%E2%80%9D%20LPTO%20Amoled%2C%202412%20x%201080%2C%20394ppi%2C%20HDR10%2B%2C%20Corning%20Gorilla%20Glass%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EProcessor%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Qualcomm%20Snapdragon%208%2B%20Gen%202%2C%20octa-core%3B%20Adreno%20730%20GPU%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMemory%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%208%2F12GB%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECapacity%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20128%2F256%2F512GB%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EPlatform%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Android%2013%2C%20Nothing%20OS%202%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMain%20camera%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dual%2050MP%20wide%2C%20f%2F1.9%20%2B%2050MP%20ultrawide%2C%20f%2F2.2%3B%20OIS%2C%20auto-focus%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMain%20camera%20video%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%204K%20%40%2030%2F60fps%2C%201080p%20%40%2030%2F60fps%3B%20live%20HDR%2C%20OIS%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EFront%20camera%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%2032MP%20wide%2C%20f%2F2.5%2C%20HDR%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EFront%20camera%20video%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Full-HD%20%40%2030fps%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EBattery%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%204700mAh%3B%20full%20charge%20in%2055m%20w%2F%2045w%20charger%3B%20Qi%20wireless%2C%20dual%20charging%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EConnectivity%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Wi-Fi%2C%20Bluetooth%205.3%2C%20NFC%20(Google%20Pay)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EBiometrics%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Fingerprint%2C%20face%20unlock%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EI%2FO%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20USB-C%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDurability%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20IP54%2C%20limited%20protection%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECards%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dual-nano%20SIM%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EColours%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dark%20grey%2C%20white%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EIn%20the%20box%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Nothing%20Phone%20(2)%2C%20USB-C-to-USB-C%20cable%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%20(UAE)%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dh2%2C499%20(12GB%2F256GB)%20%2F%20Dh2%2C799%20(12GB%2F512GB)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
How to improve Arabic reading in early years
One 45-minute class per week in Standard Arabic is not sufficient
The goal should be for grade 1 and 2 students to become fluent readers
Subjects like technology, social studies, science can be taught in later grades
Grade 1 curricula should include oral instruction in Standard Arabic
First graders must regularly practice individual letters and combinations
Time should be slotted in class to read longer passages in early grades
Improve the appearance of textbooks
Revision of curriculum should be undertaken as per research findings
Conjugations of most common verb forms should be taught
Systematic learning of Standard Arabic grammar
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Yemen's Bahais and the charges they often face
The Baha'i faith was made known in Yemen in the 19th century, first introduced by an Iranian man named Ali Muhammad Al Shirazi, considered the Herald of the Baha'i faith in 1844.
The Baha'i faith has had a growing number of followers in recent years despite persecution in Yemen and Iran.
Today, some 2,000 Baha'is reside in Yemen, according to Insaf.
"The 24 defendants represented by the House of Justice, which has intelligence outfits from the uS and the UK working to carry out an espionage scheme in Yemen under the guise of religion.. aimed to impant and found the Bahai sect on Yemeni soil by bringing foreign Bahais from abroad and homing them in Yemen," the charge sheet said.
Baha'Ullah, the founder of the Bahai faith, was exiled by the Ottoman Empire in 1868 from Iran to what is now Israel. Now, the Bahai faith's highest governing body, known as the Universal House of Justice, is based in the Israeli city of Haifa, which the Bahais turn towards during prayer.
The Houthis cite this as collective "evidence" of Bahai "links" to Israel - which the Houthis consider their enemy.
Indoor cricket in a nutshell
Indoor cricket in a nutshell
Indoor Cricket World Cup - Sept 16-20, Insportz, Dubai
16 Indoor cricket matches are 16 overs per side
8 There are eight players per team
9 There have been nine Indoor Cricket World Cups for men. Australia have won every one.
5 Five runs are deducted from the score when a wickets falls
4 Batsmen bat in pairs, facing four overs per partnership
Scoring In indoor cricket, runs are scored by way of both physical and bonus runs. Physical runs are scored by both batsmen completing a run from one crease to the other. Bonus runs are scored when the ball hits a net in different zones, but only when at least one physical run is score.
Zones
A Front net, behind the striker and wicketkeeper: 0 runs
B Side nets, between the striker and halfway down the pitch: 1 run
C Side nets between halfway and the bowlers end: 2 runs
D Back net: 4 runs on the bounce, 6 runs on the full
Electoral College Victory
Trump has so far secured 295 Electoral College votes, according to the Associated Press, exceeding the 270 needed to win. Only Nevada and Arizona remain to be called, and both swing states are leaning Republican. Trump swept all five remaining swing states, North Carolina, Georgia, Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin, sealing his path to victory and giving him a strong mandate.
Popular Vote Tally
The count is ongoing, but Trump currently leads with nearly 51 per cent of the popular vote to Harris’s 47.6 per cent. Trump has over 72.2 million votes, while Harris trails with approximately 67.4 million.
Joker: Folie a Deux
Starring: Joaquin Phoenix, Lady Gaga, Brendan Gleeson
Director: Todd Phillips
Rating: 2/5
EPL's youngest
- Ethan Nwaneri (Arsenal)
15 years, 181 days old
- Max Dowman (Arsenal)
15 years, 235 days old
- Jeremy Monga (Leicester)
15 years, 271 days old
- Harvey Elliott (Fulham)
16 years, 30 days old
- Matthew Briggs (Fulham)
16 years, 68 days old
Specs
Engine: Dual-motor all-wheel-drive electric
Range: Up to 610km
Power: 905hp
Torque: 985Nm
Price: From Dh439,000
Available: Now
Bharatanatyam
A ancient classical dance from the southern Indian state of Tamil Nadu. Intricate footwork and expressions are used to denote spiritual stories and ideas.
What sanctions would be reimposed?
Under ‘snapback’, measures imposed on Iran by the UN Security Council in six resolutions would be restored, including:
- An arms embargo
- A ban on uranium enrichment and reprocessing
- A ban on launches and other activities with ballistic missiles capable of delivering nuclear weapons, as well as ballistic missile technology transfer and technical assistance
- A targeted global asset freeze and travel ban on Iranian individuals and entities
- Authorisation for countries to inspect Iran Air Cargo and Islamic Republic of Iran Shipping Lines cargoes for banned goods
What the law says
Micro-retirement is not a recognised concept or employment status under Federal Decree Law No. 33 of 2021 on the Regulation of Labour Relations (as amended) (UAE Labour Law). As such, it reflects a voluntary work-life balance practice, rather than a recognised legal employment category, according to Dilini Loku, senior associate for law firm Gateley Middle East.
“Some companies may offer formal sabbatical policies or career break programmes; however, beyond such arrangements, there is no automatic right or statutory entitlement to extended breaks,” she explains.
“Any leave taken beyond statutory entitlements, such as annual leave, is typically regarded as unpaid leave in accordance with Article 33 of the UAE Labour Law. While employees may legally take unpaid leave, such requests are subject to the employer’s discretion and require approval.”
If an employee resigns to pursue micro-retirement, the employment contract is terminated, and the employer is under no legal obligation to rehire the employee in the future unless specific contractual agreements are in place (such as return-to-work arrangements), which are generally uncommon, Ms Loku adds.
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Jetour T1 specs
Engine: 2-litre turbocharged
Power: 254hp
Torque: 390Nm
Price: From Dh126,000
Available: Now
More from Armen Sarkissian
GAC GS8 Specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4cyl turbo
Power: 248hp at 5,200rpm
Torque: 400Nm at 1,750-4,000rpm
Transmission: 8-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 9.1L/100km
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh149,900
Jewel of the Expo 2020
252 projectors installed on Al Wasl dome
13.6km of steel used in the structure that makes it equal in length to 16 Burj Khalifas
550 tonnes of moulded steel were raised last year to cap the dome
724,000 cubic metres is the space it encloses
Stands taller than the leaning tower of Pisa
Steel trellis dome is one of the largest single structures on site
The size of 16 tennis courts and weighs as much as 500 elephants
Al Wasl means connection in Arabic
World’s largest 360-degree projection surface
Dates for the diary
To mark Bodytree’s 10th anniversary, the coming season will be filled with celebratory activities:
- September 21 Anyone interested in becoming a certified yoga instructor can sign up for a 250-hour course in Yoga Teacher Training with Jacquelene Sadek. It begins on September 21 and will take place over the course of six weekends.
- October 18 to 21 International yoga instructor, Yogi Nora, will be visiting Bodytree and offering classes.
- October 26 to November 4 International pilates instructor Courtney Miller will be on hand at the studio, offering classes.
- November 9 Bodytree is hosting a party to celebrate turning 10, and everyone is invited. Expect a day full of free classes on the grounds of the studio.
- December 11 Yogeswari, an advanced certified Jivamukti teacher, will be visiting the studio.
- February 2, 2018 Bodytree will host its 4th annual yoga market.
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Game Of Thrones Season Seven: A Bluffers Guide
Want to sound on message about the biggest show on television without actually watching it? Best not to get locked into the labyrinthine tales of revenge and royalty: as Isaac Hempstead Wright put it, all you really need to know from now on is that there’s going to be a huge fight between humans and the armies of undead White Walkers.
The season ended with a dragon captured by the Night King blowing apart the huge wall of ice that separates the human world from its less appealing counterpart. Not that some of the humans in Westeros have been particularly appealing, either.
Anyway, the White Walkers are now free to cause any kind of havoc they wish, and as Liam Cunningham told us: “Westeros may be zombie land after the Night King has finished.” If the various human factions don’t put aside their differences in season 8, we could be looking at The Walking Dead: The Medieval Years.
The specs
Engine: 2.9-litre twin-turbo V6
Power: 540hp at 6,500rpm
Torque: 600Nm at 2,500rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed auto
Kerb weight: 1580kg
Price: From Dh750k
On sale: via special order
Profile
Company name: Marefa Digital
Based: Dubai Multi Commodities Centre
Number of employees: seven
Sector: e-learning
Funding stage: Pre-seed funding of Dh1.5m in 2017 and an initial seed round of Dh2m in 2019
Investors: Friends and family
How to watch Ireland v Pakistan in UAE
When: The one-off Test starts on Friday, May 11
What time: Each day’s play is scheduled to start at 2pm UAE time.
TV: The match will be broadcast on OSN Sports Cricket HD. Subscribers to the channel can also stream the action live on OSN Play.
