Two months. I've been a gymnasium frequenter for two whole months, and a couple of mornings before my second (and final) weigh-in and measurement session at Iconic Fitness, I realise something has crept up on me. As I get out of bed, as bleary-eyed and bewildered as ever, it dawns on me that I am without pain. Not everywhere, just my back. I've no idea when it vanished completely, but it definitely has.
The problem with getting fit, or at least attempting to, is that it's not a project with an end date in sight – the exertion, the exhaustion, they never end. To stop is to go into reverse and that little fact is quite depressing for a confirmed slacker. "Do everything in moderation," people say, "and you can't go far wrong." That mantra may well work for them, but moderation isn't something I've ever been big on – for me; it's almost always all or nothing, with exercise mostly amounting to the latter.
If you've been following this column from the beginning, you'll be aware that my "nothing" approach to physical exercise hasn't really worked out for me. At the tender age of 46, I'd ended up a bit soft around the edges, packing a bit too much timber. Recently, a taxi driver in Dubai was slightly more honest in his appraisal and told me I was fat – funny, but he didn't get a tip. I did, though, and it was from a friend and former colleague who told me about the Lower Back Fix programme at Iconic. He knew I was in constant pain and that I needed a metaphorical push to get myself sorted, because my decades-long inactivity had led to poor posture and a weak core. These, in turn, had brought sciatica and niggling pain in my lower back.
For the first four weeks, I struggled with bouts of illness and the occasional onset of lethargy so bad I couldn’t put one leg in front of the other to walk to the gym, which happens to be across the road from where I live. But my coach, the long-suffering and extremely decent Hannes Loubser, has always been understanding and encouraging. He knows full well what a struggle this has been and he’s never anything other than friendly and encouraging.
As a result of his expert tutelage, that month did bring about some encouraging results. I'd lost centimetres where it matters (waist and chest), gained 3kg of muscle mass, and increases in my thigh and bicep measurements. My weight had increased, but those extra 400 grams were made of the right stuff. I was on the right track and then, as I covered in the last column, I went and changed my entire diet, practically overnight. As a result, neither me nor Loubser are expecting the results at the end of month two to be quite so impressive.
Taking my measurements only requires a few minutes, but deciphering what they mean takes longer and it's another day before I get the results. Happily, they're better than I'd feared.
My chest measurement has dropped by 4cm and my waist by 2cm, while my hips decreased in circumference by 1cm – that means my waist-to-hip ratio has improved more than last month. My biceps have increased by 1cm, as have my calf muscles, but I've lost 1cm around my thighs, which Loubser says isn't to worry about. Lean mass has decreased by nearly a kilo – something he puts down to some nights of poor sleep and stress caused by my young son's illness.
As for body fat percentage, that's down, too, by 0.69 per cent, which isn't ideal after a month's training, but Loubser says he knows the culprit. "Possible reasons can be the tummy that took time to settle due to the new diet," he says. "So the body 'protects' itself, and also I know the last week has been very tough on you guys sleep-wise and stress-wise. This has massive effects on cortisol, metabolism and fat percentage."
As is so often the case with me, life has gotten in the way of progress. But while the spreadsheet numbers aren’t going to set anyone’s world alight this time round, I don’t care. There’s plenty of time yet – and the really important thing is that I’m no longer suffering in silence – this is a training regime that does exactly what it says on the tin.
_______________
Read more from Kevin:
Cutting out animal products is one thing, eating healthily is another
Find the right coach to reach your goals
Results after a month of hurt
Staying the course when one is sick
Sorting out the diet one week at a time
Getting started with the first workout
Facing the hard truths
Sedentary with sciatica, it’s time for a fitness fix
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Company%20Profile
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Company%20Profile
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Skewed figures
In the village of Mevagissey in southwest England the housing stock has doubled in the last century while the number of residents is half the historic high. The village's Neighbourhood Development Plan states that 26% of homes are holiday retreats. Prices are high, averaging around £300,000, £50,000 more than the Cornish average of £250,000. The local average wage is £15,458.
2025 Fifa Club World Cup groups
Group A: Palmeiras, Porto, Al Ahly, Inter Miami.
Group B: Paris Saint-Germain, Atletico Madrid, Botafogo, Seattle.
Group C: Bayern Munich, Auckland City, Boca Juniors, Benfica.
Group D: Flamengo, ES Tunis, Chelsea, (Leon banned).
Group E: River Plate, Urawa, Monterrey, Inter Milan.
Group F: Fluminense, Borussia Dortmund, Ulsan, Mamelodi Sundowns.
Group G: Manchester City, Wydad, Al Ain, Juventus.
Group H: Real Madrid, Al Hilal, Pachuca, Salzburg.
At a glance
Global events: Much of the UK’s economic woes were blamed on “increased global uncertainty”, which can be interpreted as the economic impact of the Ukraine war and the uncertainty over Donald Trump’s tariffs.
Growth forecasts: Cut for 2025 from 2 per cent to 1 per cent. The OBR watchdog also estimated inflation will average 3.2 per cent this year
Welfare: Universal credit health element cut by 50 per cent and frozen for new claimants, building on cuts to the disability and incapacity bill set out earlier this month
Spending cuts: Overall day-to day-spending across government cut by £6.1bn in 2029-30
Tax evasion: Steps to crack down on tax evasion to raise “£6.5bn per year” for the public purse
Defence: New high-tech weaponry, upgrading HM Naval Base in Portsmouth
Housing: Housebuilding to reach its highest in 40 years, with planning reforms helping generate an extra £3.4bn for public finances
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Real estate tokenisation project
Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.
The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.
Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.
Ms Yang's top tips for parents new to the UAE
- Join parent networks
- Look beyond school fees
- Keep an open mind
A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
The biog
Family: wife, four children, 11 grandchildren, 16 great-grandchildren
Reads: Newspapers, historical, religious books and biographies
Education: High school in Thatta, a city now in Pakistan
Regrets: Not completing college in Karachi when universities were shut down following protests by freedom fighters for the British to quit India
Happiness: Work on creative ideas, you will also need ideals to make people happy
Company: Instabug
Founded: 2013
Based: Egypt, Cairo
Sector: IT
Employees: 100
Stage: Series A
Investors: Flat6Labs, Accel, Y Combinator and angel investors
NO OTHER LAND
Director: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham, Rachel Szor, Hamdan Ballal
Stars: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham
Rating: 3.5/5
A Bad Moms Christmas
Dir: John Lucas and Scott Moore
Starring: Mila Kunis, Kathryn Hahn, Kristen Bell, Susan Sarandon, Christine Baranski, Cheryl Hines
Two stars
Australia squads
ODI: Tim Paine (capt), Aaron Finch (vice-capt), Ashton Agar, Alex Carey, Josh Hazlewood, Travis Head, Nathan Lyon, Glenn Maxwell, Shaun Marsh, Jhye Richardson, Kane Richardson, D’Arcy Short, Billy Stanlake, Marcus Stoinis, Andrew Tye.
T20: Aaron Finch (capt), Alex Carey (vice-capt), Ashton Agar, Travis Head, Nic Maddinson, Glenn Maxwell, Jhye Richardson, Kane Richardson, D’Arcy Short, Billy Stanlake, Marcus Stoinis, Mitchell Swepson, Andrew Tye, Jack Wildermuth.
Profile box
Company name: baraka
Started: July 2020
Founders: Feras Jalbout and Kunal Taneja
Based: Dubai and Bahrain
Sector: FinTech
Initial investment: $150,000
Current staff: 12
Stage: Pre-seed capital raising of $1 million
Investors: Class 5 Global, FJ Labs, IMO Ventures, The Community Fund, VentureSouq, Fox Ventures, Dr Abdulla Elyas (private investment)
The specs
Engine: Four electric motors, one at each wheel
Power: 579hp
Torque: 859Nm
Transmission: Single-speed automatic
Price: From Dh825,900
On sale: Now
Asia Cup 2018 Qualifier
Sunday's results:
- UAE beat Malaysia by eight wickets
- Nepal beat Singapore by four wickets
- Oman v Hong Kong, no result
Tuesday fixtures:
- Malaysia v Singapore
- UAE v Oman
- Nepal v Hong Kong
What drives subscription retailing?
Once the domain of newspaper home deliveries, subscription model retailing has combined with e-commerce to permeate myriad products and services.
The concept has grown tremendously around the world and is forecast to thrive further, according to UnivDatos Market Insights’ report on recent and predicted trends in the sector.
The global subscription e-commerce market was valued at $13.2 billion (Dh48.5bn) in 2018. It is forecast to touch $478.2bn in 2025, and include the entertainment, fitness, food, cosmetics, baby care and fashion sectors.
The report says subscription-based services currently constitute “a small trend within e-commerce”. The US hosts almost 70 per cent of recurring plan firms, including leaders Dollar Shave Club, Hello Fresh and Netflix. Walmart and Sephora are among longer established retailers entering the space.
UnivDatos cites younger and affluent urbanites as prime subscription targets, with women currently the largest share of end-users.
That’s expected to remain unchanged until 2025, when women will represent a $246.6bn market share, owing to increasing numbers of start-ups targeting women.
Personal care and beauty occupy the largest chunk of the worldwide subscription e-commerce market, with changing lifestyles, work schedules, customisation and convenience among the chief future drivers.
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Kumulus Water
Started: 2021
Founders: Iheb Triki and Mohamed Ali Abid
Based: Tunisia
Sector: Water technology
Number of staff: 22
Investment raised: $4 million
The%20specs
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Bert van Marwijk factfile
Born: May 19 1952
Place of birth: Deventer, Netherlands
Playing position: Midfielder
Teams managed:
1998-2000 Fortuna Sittard
2000-2004 Feyenoord
2004-2006 Borussia Dortmund
2007-2008 Feyenoord
2008-2012 Netherlands
2013-2014 Hamburg
2015-2017 Saudi Arabia
2018 Australia
Major honours (manager):
2001/02 Uefa Cup, Feyenoord
2007/08 KNVB Cup, Feyenoord
World Cup runner-up, Netherlands
Profile
Company: Justmop.com
Date started: December 2015
Founders: Kerem Kuyucu and Cagatay Ozcan
Sector: Technology and home services
Based: Jumeirah Lake Towers, Dubai
Size: 55 employees and 100,000 cleaning requests a month
Funding: The company’s investors include Collective Spark, Faith Capital Holding, Oak Capital, VentureFriends, and 500 Startups.
Election pledges on migration
CDU: "Now is the time to control the German borders and enforce strict border rejections"
SPD: "Border closures and blanket rejections at internal borders contradict the spirit of a common area of freedom"
Everybody%20Loves%20Touda
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COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Lamsa
Founder: Badr Ward
Launched: 2014
Employees: 60
Based: Abu Dhabi
Sector: EdTech
Funding to date: $15 million
Leaderboard
63 - Mike Lorenzo-Vera (FRA)
64 - Rory McIlroy (NIR)
66 - Jon Rahm (ESP)
67 - Tom Lewis (ENG), Tommy Fleetwood (ENG)
68 - Rafael Cabrera-Bello (ESP), Marcus Kinhult (SWE)
69 - Justin Rose (ENG), Thomas Detry (BEL), Francesco Molinari (ITA), Danny Willett (ENG), Li Haotong (CHN), Matthias Schwab (AUT)
