The world continues to watch in amazement as two of the world's most famous siblings, Princes William and Harry, endure a public fallout.
While Prince William, 40, has stayed tight-lipped about the reasons behind the feud, Prince Harry, 38, has made revelations about his family in a Netflix documentary, as well as in his bestselling book, Spare, in which he talks candidly about the state of his relationship with his brother.
While parents of young children can often cajole little ones into making up after a fight with a few words of encouragement or a stern warning about consequences, getting adult siblings to come together following an argument can be much more difficult, given the arguments grown-ups have are vastly different.
Parents should not act as messengers between adult siblings. This can escalate the problem
Mohamad Naamani,
clinical psychologist, Priory Wellbeing Centre, Dubai
As children grow, the main areas of conflict can include insecurity over comparing finances, status and achievement; caring for ageing parents; as well as different values and lifestyles. “Older siblings tend to fall out more over issues related to individual identity and preferences, and conflict in decisions and opinions related to important life decisions or family matters,” says Sonia Singhal, lead assessment specialist and counselling psychologist at Thrive Wellbeing Centre, Dubai.
“When it comes to older siblings who are in conflict, parents can try to be supportive and helpful, but unless both parties request their parents to intervene, it would be advised to let them resolve their issues by themselves,” says Singhal.
“If parents do get involved, the best approach in most situations might be to listen and validate both points of view, instead of taking sides or getting caught in the middle.”
When to step in, when to step back
“Older siblings are at a stage where they are capable of independently addressing their own problems in the way they find is suitable for them,” says Mohamad Naamani, clinical psychologist at Priory Wellbeing Centre, Dubai. “Parents should encourage older siblings to resolve their own problems to promote their sense of autonomy. However, it is also important that parents provide emotional support for both siblings as fairly as possible.”
Help and support your adult children to have realistic expectations of sibling relationships
Dr Tara Wynn,
clinical director, Lighthouse Arabia
Early intervention to avoid letting issues fester is the best course. Parents are also advised to acknowledge the gripes of both parties, instead of attempting to fix them.
“Parents should not act as messengers between adult siblings,” says Naamani. This can escalate the problem and further rupture the children's relationship with each other and with the parents as well.”
Allowing for space between siblings is advisable; however, experts suggest putting a time limit on siblings going without talking, to avoid the split from becoming permanent. “Letting the space become permanent can let adult siblings simply avoid their issues forever,” says Dr Tara Wynn, clinical psychologist and clinical director at Lighthouse Arabia. “The grudges and grievances can harden and calcify, and they can mistakenly assume they are better off or have no need for their sibling because they have learnt to live without them.”
Tips for parents to facilitate harmony
“When we are in a state of blame, we shut down and revert to black and white thinking,” says Denis Liam Murphy, author of The Blame Game: How to Recover from the World’s Oldest Addiction. “We look for the quick-fix rather than a big-picture solution. When we are out of blame, our default is curiosity, creativity and empathy. We then see in colour again where more doors of possibility are open.”
Wynn adds: “Give both parties a chance to name their grievance and also how they want the relationship to be and who they want to be in that relationship. Help and support your adult children to have realistic expectations and set healthy boundaries with their siblings.”
If mediation within the family unit hasn’t worked, parents should turn to outside help in the form of therapy to try and resolve issues.
“If adult siblings require therapy, the type of therapy will dictate who is involved,” says Wynn. “Typically, family therapy requires everyone to come together and then possibly see relevant units thereafter.
“Parents should make themselves available, but also peripheral if the focus should be on the siblings themselves.”
It's also important to note that adult sibling disagreements tend to start when they are still children. “The conflict typically derives from early-life sibling rivalries over parental preferences and favouritism,” says Wynn. “Adult siblings may still be vying for love, time and attention, and resultantly nurture resentments for inequalities that exist. Childhood roles and dynamics can be hard to shake, and siblings often rebel against those roles as adults.”
Consequently, it’s important for parents to understand that arguments or rivalries that begin in childhood may not automatically disappear when they are adults, making it important to address issues at any age.
The biog
From: Upper Egypt
Age: 78
Family: a daughter in Egypt; a son in Dubai and his wife, Nabila
Favourite Abu Dhabi activity: walking near to Emirates Palace
Favourite building in Abu Dhabi: Emirates Palace
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Who was Alfred Nobel?
The Nobel Prize was created by wealthy Swedish chemist and entrepreneur Alfred Nobel.
- In his will he dictated that the bulk of his estate should be used to fund "prizes to those who, during the preceding year, have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind".
- Nobel is best known as the inventor of dynamite, but also wrote poetry and drama and could speak Russian, French, English and German by the age of 17. The five original prize categories reflect the interests closest to his heart.
- Nobel died in 1896 but it took until 1901, following a legal battle over his will, before the first prizes were awarded.
Essentials
The flights
Etihad and Emirates fly direct from the UAE to Delhi from about Dh950 return including taxes.
The hotels
Double rooms at Tijara Fort-Palace cost from 6,670 rupees (Dh377), including breakfast.
Doubles at Fort Bishangarh cost from 29,030 rupees (Dh1,641), including breakfast. Doubles at Narendra Bhawan cost from 15,360 rupees (Dh869). Doubles at Chanoud Garh cost from 19,840 rupees (Dh1,122), full board. Doubles at Fort Begu cost from 10,000 rupees (Dh565), including breakfast.
The tours
Amar Grover travelled with Wild Frontiers. A tailor-made, nine-day itinerary via New Delhi, with one night in Tijara and two nights in each of the remaining properties, including car/driver, costs from £1,445 (Dh6,968) per person.
White hydrogen: Naturally occurring hydrogen
Chromite: Hard, metallic mineral containing iron oxide and chromium oxide
Ultramafic rocks: Dark-coloured rocks rich in magnesium or iron with very low silica content
Ophiolite: A section of the earth’s crust, which is oceanic in nature that has since been uplifted and exposed on land
Olivine: A commonly occurring magnesium iron silicate mineral that derives its name for its olive-green yellow-green colour
Terror attacks in Paris, November 13, 2015
- At 9.16pm, three suicide attackers killed one person outside the Atade de France during a foootball match between France and Germany
- At 9.25pm, three attackers opened fire on restaurants and cafes over 20 minutes, killing 39 people
- Shortly after 9.40pm, three other attackers launched a three-hour raid on the Bataclan, in which 1,500 people had gathered to watch a rock concert. In total, 90 people were killed
- Salah Abdeslam, the only survivor of the terrorists, did not directly participate in the attacks, thought to be due to a technical glitch in his suicide vest
- He fled to Belgium and was involved in attacks on Brussels in March 2016. He is serving a life sentence in France
Haemoglobin disorders explained
Thalassaemia is part of a family of genetic conditions affecting the blood known as haemoglobin disorders.
Haemoglobin is a substance in the red blood cells that carries oxygen and a lack of it triggers anemia, leaving patients very weak, short of breath and pale.
The most severe type of the condition is typically inherited when both parents are carriers. Those patients often require regular blood transfusions - about 450 of the UAE's 2,000 thalassaemia patients - though frequent transfusions can lead to too much iron in the body and heart and liver problems.
The condition mainly affects people of Mediterranean, South Asian, South-East Asian and Middle Eastern origin. Saudi Arabia recorded 45,892 cases of carriers between 2004 and 2014.
A World Health Organisation study estimated that globally there are at least 950,000 'new carrier couples' every year and annually there are 1.33 million at-risk pregnancies.
MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League semi-finals, second leg:
Liverpool (0) v Barcelona (3), Tuesday, 11pm UAE
Game is on BeIN Sports
How to donate
Text the following numbers:
2289 - Dh10
6025 - Dh 20
2252 - Dh 50
2208 - Dh 100
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*numbers work for both Etisalat and du
What can victims do?
Always use only regulated platforms
Stop all transactions and communication on suspicion
Save all evidence (screenshots, chat logs, transaction IDs)
Report to local authorities
Warn others to prevent further harm
Courtesy: Crystal Intelligence
Aldar Properties Abu Dhabi T10
*November 15 to November 24
*Venue: Zayed Cricket Stadium, Abu Dhabi
*Tickets: Start at Dh10, from ttensports.com
*TV: Ten Sports
*Streaming: Jio Live
*2017 winners: Kerala Kings
*2018 winners: Northern Warriors
MAIN CARD
Bantamweight 56.4kg
Abrorbek Madiminbekov v Mehdi El Jamari
Super heavyweight 94 kg
Adnan Mohammad v Mohammed Ajaraam
Lightweight 60kg
Zakaria Eljamari v Faridoon Alik Zai
Light heavyweight 81.4kg
Mahmood Amin v Taha Marrouni
Light welterweight 64.5kg
Siyovush Gulmamadov v Nouredine Samir
Light heavyweight 81.4kg
Ilyass Habibali v Haroun Baka
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
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%3Cul%3E%0A%3Cli%3ECBDC%20real-value%20pilot%20held%20with%20three%20partner%20institutions%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EPreparing%20buy%20now%2C%20pay%20later%20regulations%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EPreparing%20for%20the%202023%20launch%20of%20the%20domestic%20card%20initiative%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EPhase%20one%20of%20the%20Financial%20Infrastructure%20Transformation%20(FiT)%20completed%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3C%2Ful%3E%0A
Groom and Two Brides
Director: Elie Semaan
Starring: Abdullah Boushehri, Laila Abdallah, Lulwa Almulla
Rating: 3/5
The years Ramadan fell in May
More on Quran memorisation:
