Ruma Mehra, 38, was devastated after the death of her twin brother from Covid-19 last May. She grieved her sibling’s death, but gradually found herself withdrawing into a cocoon, unable to shed tears over the tragedy.
Her worried family consulted a psychiatrist who put Mehra on a two-week “emotion-focused therapy” course. EFT is based on the premise that emotions are key to identity, and required the mother-of-two to share her feelings as much as she could with her family or write them down.
“In the beginning, it was an effort. But when I saw my family affected by my state, I forced myself to express myself and share with them how sad I was feeling, reminiscing about good times with my brother and crying whenever I couldn’t hold back the tears,” says Mehra. After a month, she started feeling “lighter, brighter and ready to reclaim my life”.
As challenging as it may be, psychologists advise that the best way to handle sadness and grief is to embrace them. If talking about your circumstances helps, find empathetic people who will listen to you. If you feel like crying, go right ahead.
“Many people associate crying during grief with depression, when it can actually be a sign of healing,” says clinical psychologist Sakshi Gupta. "While women find it relatively easier to express themselves through tears, boys and men are socially conditioned not to, even though this can reduce negative health behaviours and help them have fuller lives."
Crying, she says, is a valuable “safety valve” and can bring mental health benefits. Doing so in a social setting can facilitate bonding and promote feelings of kinship or sorority. Withholding tears, on the other hand, can trigger stress, and lead to anxiety build-up, blood pressure and muscle tightening.
When you experience pain deeply, you’re also able to feel happiness with the same intensity, leading to a fuller life
Kamlesh Masalawala,
laughter therapist and founder of Healthy Crying Club
Biologically, crying releases cortisol and creates feel-good endorphins, which are also known as the body’s natural painkillers. Emotional tears also have higher levels of stress hormones in them, according to the American Academy of Ophthalmology. In other words, one is literally purged of distress as one cries.
Grief counsellor Mini Makhija says she advises her patients to “never hold back from crying” whenever they feel overwhelmed. “They come back reporting more mental peace followed by a gradual return to normalcy after they’ve purged themselves through bouts of crying,” she says.
Laughter therapist Kamlesh Masalawala was so convinced of the healing power of tears that he launched India’s first crying club in 2017 in Surat. One Sunday a month, men and women flock to the Healthy Crying Club for a collective and cathartic sobfest. “When laughter can be shared, why not grief?” says Masalawala.
When sorrow, misery and pain overwhelm you, “tears emerge naturally as a response stimulated by anxiety. When you experience pain deeply, you’re also able to feel happiness with the same intensity, leading to a fuller life,” he explains.
The club’s 100-odd members say the congregation provides them with a valuable outlet for their grief because, for many adults, crying at home isn’t an option for fear of hurting their loved ones. This often leads to an unhealthy build-up of negative feelings, triggering further stress and anxiety.
“I was very disturbed after my husband’s death last May,” shares one crying club member, 63, who requested anonymity. "As both my children are in Australia, and couldn’t even attend his funeral due to travel restrictions, there was a lot of pent-up hurt and sadness, which was impacting my health.
“When I come to the club and see others experiencing grief, I feel I’m not alone. It’s strangely comforting and I judge myself less harshly.”
Expressing sadness is not embarrassing or a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength
Mini Makhija,
grief counsellor
The concept of holding a group activity to induce tears originated in Japan in 2013. Termed rui-katsu, the first crying festival was organised in Tokyo in 2017. Now, increasingly, the Japanese are booking themselves for community weeping sessions, with rui-katsu finding resonance among the young and old alike. A series of books that features pictures of men sobbing have also become popular.
A sales executive from Tokyo, 30, who requested anonymity, is a regular at rui-katsu sessions, which she finds therapeutic. “Crying clears the mind and reduces stress. Whether you’ve had a tough time with your boss, your boyfriend or trouble with a diet, tears can help you reset. In Japanese culture, people tend to hide their feelings rather than openly express them. So, many of my friends congregate at rui-katsu or ‘tear-seeking’ sessions to share movies, videos or [audiovisual clips] that evoke strong emotions or tears and where we can let it all out without judgment.”
Historically, too, tears were believed to be “diamonds that embodied celestial spirits”, in ancient Greek and Roman culture, and philosophers believed tears offered an emotional release and were both purifying and purgative.
“As we grow older, we form walls that prevent us from expressing ourselves clearly,” says Makhija. "Children are emotionally and physically more healthy compared to adults because they cry easily if hurt. Expressing sadness is not embarrassing or a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength."
While not everyone will seek out a therapist or communal crying club, Makhija recommends allotting a “crying nook” in the home. “It could be your pantry, terrace or a garden. Find a spot where you’re least likely to be disturbed. Play doleful music through earphones, burn an aroma candle and focus on your grief. Let it wash over you like a tidal wave. The tears will follow.”
Other simple hacks Makhija recommends are watching sad movies, journaling one’s feelings and volunteering to help the underprivileged.
Company%20profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EWafeq%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EJanuary%202019%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ENadim%20Alameddine%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EDubai%2C%20UAE%3Cstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EIndustry%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3Esoftware%20as%20a%20service%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFunds%20raised%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E%243%20million%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ERaed%20Ventures%20and%20Wamda%2C%20among%20others%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Zidane's managerial achievements
La Liga: 2016/17
Spanish Super Cup: 2017
Uefa Champions League: 2015/16, 2016/17, 2017/18
Uefa Super Cup: 2016, 2017
Fifa Club World Cup: 2016, 2017
In numbers: China in Dubai
The number of Chinese people living in Dubai: An estimated 200,000
Number of Chinese people in International City: Almost 50,000
Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2018/19: 120,000
Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2010: 20,000
Percentage increase in visitors in eight years: 500 per cent
Results
6.30pm: Al Maktoum Challenge Round-2 Group 1 (PA) US$75,000 (Dirt) 1,900m
Winner: Ziyadd, Richard Mullen (jockey), Jean de Roualle (trainer).
7.05pm: Al Rashidiya Group 2 (TB) $250,000 (Turf) 1,800m
Winner: Barney Roy, William Buick, Charlie Appleby.
7.40pm: Meydan Cup Listed Handicap (TB) $175,000 (T) 2,810m
Winner: Secret Advisor, Tadhg O’Shea, Charlie Appleby.
8.15pm: Handicap (TB) $175,000 (D) 1,600m
Winner: Plata O Plomo, Carlos Lopez, Susanne Berneklint.
8.50pm: Handicap (TB) $135,000 (T) 1,600m
Winner: Salute The Soldier, Adrie de Vries, Fawzi Nass.
9.25pm: Al Shindagha Sprint Group 3 (TB) $200,000 (D) 1,200m
Winner: Gladiator King, Mickael Barzalona, Satish Seemar.
THE CARD
2pm: Maiden Dh 60,000 (Dirt) 1,400m
2.30pm: Handicap Dh 76,000 (D) 1,400m
3pm: Handicap Dh 64,000 (D) 1,200m
3.30pm: Shadwell Farm Conditions Dh 100,000 (D) 1,000m
4pm: Maiden Dh 60,000 (D) 1,000m
4.30pm: Handicap 64,000 (D) 1,950m
Jetour T1 specs
Engine: 2-litre turbocharged
Power: 254hp
Torque: 390Nm
Price: From Dh126,000
Available: Now
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Company%20Profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Astra%20Tech%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EMarch%202022%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EDubai%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAbdallah%20Abu%20Sheikh%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EIndustry%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20technology%20investment%20and%20development%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFunding%20size%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20%24500m%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Key findings of Jenkins report
- Founder of the Muslim Brotherhood, Hassan al Banna, "accepted the political utility of violence"
- Views of key Muslim Brotherhood ideologue, Sayyid Qutb, have “consistently been understood” as permitting “the use of extreme violence in the pursuit of the perfect Islamic society” and “never been institutionally disowned” by the movement.
- Muslim Brotherhood at all levels has repeatedly defended Hamas attacks against Israel, including the use of suicide bombers and the killing of civilians.
- Laying out the report in the House of Commons, David Cameron told MPs: "The main findings of the review support the conclusion that membership of, association with, or influence by the Muslim Brotherhood should be considered as a possible indicator of extremism."
Our legal columnist
Name: Yousef Al Bahar
Advocate at Al Bahar & Associate Advocates and Legal Consultants, established in 1994
Education: Mr Al Bahar was born in 1979 and graduated in 2008 from the Judicial Institute. He took after his father, who was one of the first Emirati lawyers
Where to donate in the UAE
The Emirates Charity Portal
You can donate to several registered charities through a “donation catalogue”. The use of the donation is quite specific, such as buying a fan for a poor family in Niger for Dh130.
The General Authority of Islamic Affairs & Endowments
The site has an e-donation service accepting debit card, credit card or e-Dirham, an electronic payment tool developed by the Ministry of Finance and First Abu Dhabi Bank.
Al Noor Special Needs Centre
You can donate online or order Smiles n’ Stuff products handcrafted by Al Noor students. The centre publishes a wish list of extras needed, starting at Dh500.
Beit Al Khair Society
Beit Al Khair Society has the motto “From – and to – the UAE,” with donations going towards the neediest in the country. Its website has a list of physical donation sites, but people can also contribute money by SMS, bank transfer and through the hotline 800-22554.
Dar Al Ber Society
Dar Al Ber Society, which has charity projects in 39 countries, accept cash payments, money transfers or SMS donations. Its donation hotline is 800-79.
Dubai Cares
Dubai Cares provides several options for individuals and companies to donate, including online, through banks, at retail outlets, via phone and by purchasing Dubai Cares branded merchandise. It is currently running a campaign called Bookings 2030, which allows people to help change the future of six underprivileged children and young people.
Emirates Airline Foundation
Those who travel on Emirates have undoubtedly seen the little donation envelopes in the seat pockets. But the foundation also accepts donations online and in the form of Skywards Miles. Donated miles are used to sponsor travel for doctors, surgeons, engineers and other professionals volunteering on humanitarian missions around the world.
Emirates Red Crescent
On the Emirates Red Crescent website you can choose between 35 different purposes for your donation, such as providing food for fasters, supporting debtors and contributing to a refugee women fund. It also has a list of bank accounts for each donation type.
Gulf for Good
Gulf for Good raises funds for partner charity projects through challenges, like climbing Kilimanjaro and cycling through Thailand. This year’s projects are in partnership with Street Child Nepal, Larchfield Kids, the Foundation for African Empowerment and SOS Children's Villages. Since 2001, the organisation has raised more than $3.5 million (Dh12.8m) in support of over 50 children’s charities.
Noor Dubai Foundation
Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum launched the Noor Dubai Foundation a decade ago with the aim of eliminating all forms of preventable blindness globally. You can donate Dh50 to support mobile eye camps by texting the word “Noor” to 4565 (Etisalat) or 4849 (du).
JAPAN SQUAD
Goalkeepers: Masaaki Higashiguchi, Shuichi Gonda, Daniel Schmidt
Defenders: Yuto Nagatomo, Tomoaki Makino, Maya Yoshida, Sho Sasaki, Hiroki Sakai, Sei Muroya, Genta Miura, Takehiro Tomiyasu
Midfielders: Toshihiro Aoyama, Genki Haraguchi, Gaku Shibasaki, Wataru Endo, Junya Ito, Shoya Nakajima, Takumi Minamino, Hidemasa Morita, Ritsu Doan
Forwards: Yuya Osako, Takuma Asano, Koya Kitagawa
Padmaavat
Director: Sanjay Leela Bhansali
Starring: Ranveer Singh, Deepika Padukone, Shahid Kapoor, Jim Sarbh
3.5/5
What is the FNC?
The Federal National Council is one of five federal authorities established by the UAE constitution. It held its first session on December 2, 1972, a year to the day after Federation.
It has 40 members, eight of whom are women. The members represent the UAE population through each of the emirates. Abu Dhabi and Dubai have eight members each, Sharjah and Ras al Khaimah six, and Ajman, Fujairah and Umm Al Quwain have four.
They bring Emirati issues to the council for debate and put those concerns to ministers summoned for questioning.
The FNC’s main functions include passing, amending or rejecting federal draft laws, discussing international treaties and agreements, and offering recommendations on general subjects raised during sessions.
Federal draft laws must first pass through the FNC for recommendations when members can amend the laws to suit the needs of citizens. The draft laws are then forwarded to the Cabinet for consideration and approval.
Since 2006, half of the members have been elected by UAE citizens to serve four-year terms and the other half are appointed by the Ruler’s Courts of the seven emirates.
In the 2015 elections, 78 of the 252 candidates were women. Women also represented 48 per cent of all voters and 67 per cent of the voters were under the age of 40.
White hydrogen: Naturally occurring hydrogen
Chromite: Hard, metallic mineral containing iron oxide and chromium oxide
Ultramafic rocks: Dark-coloured rocks rich in magnesium or iron with very low silica content
Ophiolite: A section of the earth’s crust, which is oceanic in nature that has since been uplifted and exposed on land
Olivine: A commonly occurring magnesium iron silicate mineral that derives its name for its olive-green yellow-green colour
UAE players with central contracts
Rohan Mustafa, Ashfaq Ahmed, Chirag Suri, Rameez Shahzad, Shaiman Anwar, Adnan Mufti, Mohammed Usman, Ghulam Shabbir, Ahmed Raza, Qadeer Ahmed, Amir Hayat, Mohammed Naveed and Imran Haider.
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
The%20specs
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EPowertrain%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESingle%20electric%20motor%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E201hp%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E310Nm%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETransmission%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESingle-speed%20auto%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBattery%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E53kWh%20lithium-ion%20battery%20pack%20(GS%20base%20model)%3B%2070kWh%20battery%20pack%20(GF)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETouring%20range%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E350km%20(GS)%3B%20480km%20(GF)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EFrom%20Dh129%2C900%20(GS)%3B%20Dh149%2C000%20(GF)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOn%20sale%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Now%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Harry%20%26%20Meghan
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ELiz%20Garbus%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Duke%20and%20Duchess%20of%20Sussex%0D%3Cbr%3E%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E3%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Bullet%20Train
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20David%20Leitch%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Brad%20Pitt%2C%20Aaron%20Taylor-Johnson%2C%20Brian%20Tyree%20Henry%2C%20Sandra%20Bullock%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%203%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Tiger%20Stripes%20
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Amanda%20Nell%20Eu%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Zafreen%20Zairizal%2C%20Deena%20Ezral%20and%20Piqa%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%204.5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
CHATGPT%20ENTERPRISE%20FEATURES
%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Enterprise-grade%20security%20and%20privacy%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Unlimited%20higher-speed%20GPT-4%20access%20with%20no%20caps%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Longer%20context%20windows%20for%20processing%20longer%20inputs%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Advanced%20data%20analysis%20capabilities%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Customisation%20options%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Shareable%20chat%20templates%20that%20companies%20can%20use%20to%20collaborate%20and%20build%20common%20workflows%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Analytics%20dashboard%20for%20usage%20insights%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%E2%80%A2%20Free%20credits%20to%20use%20OpenAI%20APIs%20to%20extend%20OpenAI%20into%20a%20fully-custom%20solution%20for%20enterprises%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
