I had an unusual moment last week. I was wearing exactly the right dress. It ticked all the boxes. I was prepared - not my normal fraught self. My hair was just so, my shoes were the right height, and my bag actually matched some of the other things that were going on. I was, as they say, well turned out.
This is a rare moment, which may surprise you. After all I am, ahem, a fashion editor. Shouldn't we all look like something special? Well, I'll let you in on something - we don't. Yes, we keep a pair of heels in the back seat of our car just in case but that's about as far as it goes. Sure, we scrub up well if duty calls but most of the time we dress purely by default, lucky enough to have our arms and legs encased in something that allows us to get on with business.
After my recent polished incident, however, I've come to realise that, yes, at least occasionally planning is worth it, even if it's simply to remind ourselves that we can.
Take some time and look to the trends, as they are there to help. This spring it's all about the Seventies, from the wide-leg trouser to the pussy-bow silk shirt. If that all sounds a bit much, look to Phoebe Philo, who started at Céline this year and brought us the most beautiful whitewashed palette in clean lines and ever so flattering fabrics. High-octane prints, as always, are back, except with a little more volume. Think bigger, louder and more playful than ever. In terms of length, most of us will be glad to know that short is out and mid-length is in.
As for colour, it's all about vibrant blocking. Orange, turquoise, hot pink and yellow - all dominating colours most of us avoid, but if used cleverly look playful and fun.
But dressing like a pro takes commitment and preparation. It takes time - a 9-to-5 sort of time. It takes not rolling around the sand or the floor of an old factory getting just the right shot for the next fashion editorial, or pelting around Dubai Mall with 13 bags - only to drive right back to Abu Dhabi for a 5am start.
Don't get me wrong, we would all love to be planners. To lie in bed working through the next day's look, which necklace will set off which neon shirt, et cetera. But we don't. In reality most of us have about 28 minutes to prepare for the day - including shower time.
Fashion can't, and trust me on this, even make itself happy. So for all those fashion haters - those who sneer at the part-human, part-computer-generated-looking fashionistas you see on television and in glossy magazines - know that the real fashion people, the ones behind the scenes making the whole thing happen, are usually a whole lot worse off than you.
M-ometer
This week's highs and lows:
A TALLY OF TWO CITIES We're in love with this blog's clever cliché comparisons and graphics. parisvsnyc.blogspot.com
FOR THE BIRDS On Aura Tout Vu's couture show featuring a nest full of eggs crosses the line.
REDHEADS They're stealing the spotlight: singers, actresses and now models.
NOT FOR KIDS Lady Gaga's song Telephone is now a children's book. What?!
DARK LIPS Our favourite new vampy shade is Magnifica by Dolce&Gabbana.
What is a robo-adviser?
Robo-advisers use an online sign-up process to gauge an investor’s risk tolerance by feeding information such as their age, income, saving goals and investment history into an algorithm, which then assigns them an investment portfolio, ranging from more conservative to higher risk ones.
These portfolios are made up of exchange traded funds (ETFs) with exposure to indices such as US and global equities, fixed-income products like bonds, though exposure to real estate, commodity ETFs or gold is also possible.
Investing in ETFs allows robo-advisers to offer fees far lower than traditional investments, such as actively managed mutual funds bought through a bank or broker. Investors can buy ETFs directly via a brokerage, but with robo-advisers they benefit from investment portfolios matched to their risk tolerance as well as being user friendly.
Many robo-advisers charge what are called wrap fees, meaning there are no additional fees such as subscription or withdrawal fees, success fees or fees for rebalancing.
Key facilities
- Olympic-size swimming pool with a split bulkhead for multi-use configurations, including water polo and 50m/25m training lanes
- Premier League-standard football pitch
- 400m Olympic running track
- NBA-spec basketball court with auditorium
- 600-seat auditorium
- Spaces for historical and cultural exploration
- An elevated football field that doubles as a helipad
- Specialist robotics and science laboratories
- AR and VR-enabled learning centres
- Disruption Lab and Research Centre for developing entrepreneurial skills
The smuggler
Eldarir had arrived at JFK in January 2020 with three suitcases, containing goods he valued at $300, when he was directed to a search area.
Officers found 41 gold artefacts among the bags, including amulets from a funerary set which prepared the deceased for the afterlife.
Also found was a cartouche of a Ptolemaic king on a relief that was originally part of a royal building or temple.
The largest single group of items found in Eldarir’s cases were 400 shabtis, or figurines.
Khouli conviction
Khouli smuggled items into the US by making false declarations to customs about the country of origin and value of the items.
According to Immigration and Customs Enforcement, he provided “false provenances which stated that [two] Egyptian antiquities were part of a collection assembled by Khouli's father in Israel in the 1960s” when in fact “Khouli acquired the Egyptian antiquities from other dealers”.
He was sentenced to one year of probation, six months of home confinement and 200 hours of community service in 2012 after admitting buying and smuggling Egyptian antiquities, including coffins, funerary boats and limestone figures.
For sale
A number of other items said to come from the collection of Ezeldeen Taha Eldarir are currently or recently for sale.
Their provenance is described in near identical terms as the British Museum shabti: bought from Salahaddin Sirmali, "authenticated and appraised" by Hossen Rashed, then imported to the US in 1948.
- An Egyptian Mummy mask dating from 700BC-30BC, is on offer for £11,807 ($15,275) online by a seller in Mexico
- A coffin lid dating back to 664BC-332BC was offered for sale by a Colorado-based art dealer, with a starting price of $65,000
- A shabti that was on sale through a Chicago-based coin dealer, dating from 1567BC-1085BC, is up for $1,950
The specs: 2018 Jaguar F-Type Convertible
Price, base / as tested: Dh283,080 / Dh318,465
Engine: 2.0-litre inline four-cylinder
Transmission: Eight-speed automatic
Power: 295hp @ 5,500rpm
Torque: 400Nm @ 1,500rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 7.2L / 100km
WITHIN%20SAND
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Your rights as an employee
The government has taken an increasingly tough line against companies that fail to pay employees on time. Three years ago, the Cabinet passed a decree allowing the government to halt the granting of work permits to companies with wage backlogs.
The new measures passed by the Cabinet in 2016 were an update to the Wage Protection System, which is in place to track whether a company pays its employees on time or not.
If wages are 10 days late, the new measures kick in and the company is alerted it is in breach of labour rules. If wages remain unpaid for a total of 16 days, the authorities can cancel work permits, effectively shutting off operations. Fines of up to Dh5,000 per unpaid employee follow after 60 days.
Despite those measures, late payments remain an issue, particularly in the construction sector. Smaller contractors, such as electrical, plumbing and fit-out businesses, often blame the bigger companies that hire them for wages being late.
The authorities have urged employees to report their companies at the labour ministry or Tawafuq service centres — there are 15 in Abu Dhabi.