FEELING STRESSED? The American novelist and editor Edgar W Howe once said: "If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers." As a long, hot summer draws to its close, the Instant Expert is sure thousands of harassed mothers around the world can relate to that.
EVEN WORKING MOTHERS? Even those who are lucky enough to work to escape from their children will by now be fed up with the 20 or so phone calls a day detailing who is standing on whose head at any particular time of the loooooong day. And summer's ubiquitous "Are we there yet?" turns into "When are you coming home?"
OK, TELL ME MORE At the beginning of September, the autumn term. Your children are expected to show up in the right clothes, carrying the right bag and lunch box, as well as the proper mindset, to embark on another year of education and self-improvement. They're not as excited by this prospect as you are.
ARE WE LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS? Yes and no. Of course we are happy to return to "normality", but the pressure of organising everything, especially if you have more than one child (possibly in different schools), makes for an enormous challenge.
WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? You just don't get it, do you? You think those school uniforms just buy themselves? And the shoes (which have to be black and pretty hideous, but your fashion-conscious son/daughter still has to agree to wear them)? And who is going to plan the contents of the lunch box so they don't just eat Oreos for 12 weeks?
LARGE CHANCE OF REBELLION First of all, you have to make the little blighters get out of bed before 10am. Then get dressed (in clothes they don't want to wear) and spend the whole day concentrating on algebra and Shakespeare as opposed to Facebook. Last year the Instant Expert's eldest daughter came home and declared that the class had voted and unanimously decided they didn't want to study Shakespeare. One for the "How to impress your new teacher on your first day" list.
OH, SO A BIT OF PREPARATION IS NEEDED? Just a tad. The French spend the entire summer preparing forla réntree, as they call it. It's almost as big as Ramadan or Christmas. And after it's happened they ask how it went for another few weeks.
BUT WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? Just about everything from the wrong compass to making a mistake on the date or start time. There is so much that can go awry that French schools provide parents with a long list of exactly what to buy, down to the exercise books and how far apart the lines in it have to be. No, we are not exaggerating.
YES, BUT THAT'S THE FRENCH Granted, but the rest of us have the task of organising not only uniforms, lunch boxes, wake-up calls, school buses, school fees and so forth, but also the dreaded PE and swimming kit. They will need kit that comes from the uniform shop, as well as goggles and flip-flops for swimming. The goggles will be lost every week, as will most of the other bits. So you get a little taste of that "Going back to school" syndrome on a weekly basis.
WHAT CAN I DO TO PREPARE? Left it a bit late, haven't you? Read our box of top tips to the right. But next year, try to get with the beat baggy.
Top six tips
LUNCH BOXES Scour the internet for good ideas of what to put in their lunch boxes. There is nothing more disheartening than eating the same grub as all last year. Make it a fun task. You can do it with the kids, and that way they might even eat it.
THE RIGHT KIT Do not go to the school uniform shop the week before term starts. If at all possible, go several weeks before, or you risk everything being sold out as well having to battle a huge rush.
PLAN IN ADVANCE Think of going back to school as a little like Christmas. Do a little every week for weeks in advance. Buying goggles, for example, or the hideous school shoes. If you have to sew on name tags, do it in July - or better still, get your mother to do it in July.
EARLY NIGHTS Try to get them back into early nights a week before school starts, half an hour earlier each night.
BITS OF PAPER Your child will come back with lots of bits of paper for you to fill in – for school ID, for example – so keep them all in the same (memorable) place.
DON'T PANIC They will be fine. The world will still keep turning even if your child doesn't have the right PE kit for the first week. Honestly. Trust us on this.
The specs
Engine: 2.7-litre 4-cylinder Turbomax
Power: 310hp
Torque: 583Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh192,500
On sale: Now
At a glance
Global events: Much of the UK’s economic woes were blamed on “increased global uncertainty”, which can be interpreted as the economic impact of the Ukraine war and the uncertainty over Donald Trump’s tariffs.
Growth forecasts: Cut for 2025 from 2 per cent to 1 per cent. The OBR watchdog also estimated inflation will average 3.2 per cent this year
Welfare: Universal credit health element cut by 50 per cent and frozen for new claimants, building on cuts to the disability and incapacity bill set out earlier this month
Spending cuts: Overall day-to day-spending across government cut by £6.1bn in 2029-30
Tax evasion: Steps to crack down on tax evasion to raise “£6.5bn per year” for the public purse
Defence: New high-tech weaponry, upgrading HM Naval Base in Portsmouth
Housing: Housebuilding to reach its highest in 40 years, with planning reforms helping generate an extra £3.4bn for public finances
The National's picks
4.35pm: Tilal Al Khalediah
5.10pm: Continous
5.45pm: Raging Torrent
6.20pm: West Acre
7pm: Flood Zone
7.40pm: Straight No Chaser
8.15pm: Romantic Warrior
8.50pm: Calandogan
9.30pm: Forever Young
From Zero
Artist: Linkin Park
Label: Warner Records
Number of tracks: 11
Rating: 4/5
The Perfect Couple
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Liev Schreiber, Jack Reynor
Creator: Jenna Lamia
Rating: 3/5
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
The 10 Questions
- Is there a God?
- How did it all begin?
- What is inside a black hole?
- Can we predict the future?
- Is time travel possible?
- Will we survive on Earth?
- Is there other intelligent life in the universe?
- Should we colonise space?
- Will artificial intelligence outsmart us?
- How do we shape the future?
The specs
Engine: 3.9-litre twin-turbo V8
Transmission: seven-speed
Power: 620bhp
Torque: 760Nm
Price: Dh898,000
On sale: now
RESULTS
6.30pm: Emirates Holidays Maiden (TB) Dh 82,500 (Dirt) 1,900m
Winner: Lady Snazz, Richard Mullen (jockey), Satish Seemar (trainer).
7.05pm: Arabian Adventures Maiden (TB) Dh 82,500 (D) 1,200m
Winner: Zhou Storm, Connor Beasley, Ali Rashid Al Raihe.
7.40pm: Emirates Skywards Handicap (TB) Dh 82,500 (D) 1,200m
Winner: Rich And Famous, Royston Ffrench, Salem bin Ghadayer.
8.15pm: Emirates Airline Conditions (TB) Dh 120,000 (D) 1,400m
Winner: Rio Angie, Sam Hitchcock, Doug Watson.
8.50pm: Emirates Sky Cargo (TB) Dh 92,500 (D) 1,400m
Winner: Kinver Edge, Richard Mullen, Satish Seemar.
9.15pm: Emirates.com (TB) Dh 95,000 (D) 2,000m
Winner: Firnas, Xavier Ziani, Salem bin Ghadayer.
How to watch Ireland v Pakistan in UAE
When: The one-off Test starts on Friday, May 11
What time: Each day’s play is scheduled to start at 2pm UAE time.
TV: The match will be broadcast on OSN Sports Cricket HD. Subscribers to the channel can also stream the action live on OSN Play.
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
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MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League final:
Who: Real Madrid v Liverpool
Where: NSC Olimpiyskiy Stadium, Kiev, Ukraine
When: Saturday, May 26, 10.45pm (UAE)
TV: Match on BeIN Sports
Real estate tokenisation project
Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.
The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.
Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
The smuggler
Eldarir had arrived at JFK in January 2020 with three suitcases, containing goods he valued at $300, when he was directed to a search area.
Officers found 41 gold artefacts among the bags, including amulets from a funerary set which prepared the deceased for the afterlife.
Also found was a cartouche of a Ptolemaic king on a relief that was originally part of a royal building or temple.
The largest single group of items found in Eldarir’s cases were 400 shabtis, or figurines.
Khouli conviction
Khouli smuggled items into the US by making false declarations to customs about the country of origin and value of the items.
According to Immigration and Customs Enforcement, he provided “false provenances which stated that [two] Egyptian antiquities were part of a collection assembled by Khouli's father in Israel in the 1960s” when in fact “Khouli acquired the Egyptian antiquities from other dealers”.
He was sentenced to one year of probation, six months of home confinement and 200 hours of community service in 2012 after admitting buying and smuggling Egyptian antiquities, including coffins, funerary boats and limestone figures.
For sale
A number of other items said to come from the collection of Ezeldeen Taha Eldarir are currently or recently for sale.
Their provenance is described in near identical terms as the British Museum shabti: bought from Salahaddin Sirmali, "authenticated and appraised" by Hossen Rashed, then imported to the US in 1948.
- An Egyptian Mummy mask dating from 700BC-30BC, is on offer for £11,807 ($15,275) online by a seller in Mexico
- A coffin lid dating back to 664BC-332BC was offered for sale by a Colorado-based art dealer, with a starting price of $65,000
- A shabti that was on sale through a Chicago-based coin dealer, dating from 1567BC-1085BC, is up for $1,950
The Transfiguration
Director: Michael O’Shea
Starring: Eric Ruffin, Chloe Levine
Three stars
Company%20Profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%20name%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Cargoz%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EDate%20started%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20January%202022%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounders%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Premlal%20Pullisserry%20and%20Lijo%20Antony%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dubai%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ENumber%20of%20staff%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%2030%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestment%20stage%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Seed%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Dubai Bling season three
Cast: Loujain Adada, Zeina Khoury, Farhana Bodi, Ebraheem Al Samadi, Mona Kattan, and couples Safa & Fahad Siddiqui and DJ Bliss & Danya Mohammed
Rating: 1/5
Paatal Lok season two
Directors: Avinash Arun, Prosit Roy
Stars: Jaideep Ahlawat, Ishwak Singh, Lc Sekhose, Merenla Imsong
Rating: 4.5/5
Tax authority targets shisha levy evasion
The Federal Tax Authority will track shisha imports with electronic markers to protect customers and ensure levies have been paid.
Khalid Ali Al Bustani, director of the tax authority, on Sunday said the move is to "prevent tax evasion and support the authority’s tax collection efforts".
The scheme’s first phase, which came into effect on 1st January, 2019, covers all types of imported and domestically produced and distributed cigarettes. As of May 1, importing any type of cigarettes without the digital marks will be prohibited.
He said the latest phase will see imported and locally produced shisha tobacco tracked by the final quarter of this year.
"The FTA also maintains ongoing communication with concerned companies, to help them adapt their systems to meet our requirements and coordinate between all parties involved," he said.
As with cigarettes, shisha was hit with a 100 per cent tax in October 2017, though manufacturers and cafes absorbed some of the costs to prevent prices doubling.
RESULTS
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3E9pm%3A%20Maiden%20(PA)%20Dh70%2C000%20(Dirt)%202%2C000m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Mubhir%20Al%20Ain%2C%20Antonio%20Fresu%20(jockey)%2C%20Ahmed%20Al%20Mehairbi%20(trainer)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E9.30pm%3A%20Handicap%20(TB)%20Dh70%2C000%20(D)%202%2C000m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Exciting%20Days%2C%20Oscar%20Chavez%2C%20Doug%20Watson%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E10pm%3A%20Al%20Ain%20Cup%20%E2%80%93%20Prestige%20(PA)%20Dh100%2C000%20(D)%202%2C000m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Suny%20Du%20Loup%2C%20Marcelino%20Rodrigues%2C%20Hamad%20Al%20Marar%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E10.30pm%3A%20Maiden%20(PA)%20Dh70%2C000%20(D)%201%2C800m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Jafar%20Des%20Arnets%2C%20Oscar%20Chavez%2C%20Ahmed%20Al%20Mehairbi%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E11pm%3A%20Wathba%20Stallions%20Cup%20%E2%80%93%20Handicap%20(PA)%20Dh70%2C000%20(D)%201%2C600m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Taj%20Al%20Izz%2C%20Richard%20Mullen%2C%20Ibrahim%20Al%20Hadhrami%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E11.30pm%3A%20Maiden%20(PA)%20Dh70%2C000%20(D)%201%2C400m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Majdy%2C%20Antonio%20Fresu%2C%20Jean%20de%20Roualle%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3E12am%3A%20Maiden%20(PA)%20Dh70%2C000%20(D)%201%2C400m%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EWinner%3A%20Hamloola%2C%20Sam%20Hitchcott%2C%20Salem%20Al%20Ketbi%3C%2Fp%3E%0A