The messages around modern womanhood have surely reached peak exhaustion.
Scrolling through social media, the existence of the #momsoftiktok, LinkedIn boss babes, Instagram momfluencers and X Huns throws up more questions than answers.
Are you a tradwife or a wild woman? A crunchy mum or a scrunchy mum? A radical feminist or a liberal? A silky mummy or almond mummy? Maybe you’re a girl boss? And if so, are you a performative girl boss, woke girl boss or Wattpad girl boss?
No matter your hashtag, you’re probably taking on way more than your fair share of the domestic workload if you’re in a relationship.
Working women don’t have an innate wish to organise the office birthday collection any more than homemakers have psychic abilities to know the ketchup is about to run out
This is because there remains in the mystical, mythical “women having it all” Venn diagram of life, a whopping great hole at the intersection of work, marriage and motherhood called “invisible labour”.
The phrase – coined by sociologist Arlene Kaplan Daniels in a 1987 paper – refers to the never-ending, oft-thankless tasks many women take on at some point in their lives and then get stuck with.
Children drop-offs are just a drop in the ocean
These tasks are taken on not because women have an overwhelming desire to arrange play dates, pick up dirty socks, collect the dry cleaning or remember family birthdays.
Nor because mothers have an innate urge to remember that swimming is on Wednesdays weeks one and three and Thursdays weeks two and four of each month.
Working women do not have an unwavering wish to organise the office birthday collection any more than homemakers have psychic abilities inaccessible to men who instinctively know the ketchup is about to run out so it should be added to the shopping list.
They also do not do it because, as men often seem to think, “I thought you enjoyed it.”
No, they take on these additional jobs because of the continuing expectations around “female roles”, which show no signs of abating even in recent studies.
A study published in the Journal of Business and Psychology in May – titled: Who’s Remembering to Buy the Eggs? The Meaning, Measurement, and Implications of Invisible Family Load – reached a conclusion many women will recognise.
“Although much is known of the concrete and observable physical tasks associated with household management and child-rearing,” it read, “there is scant understanding of the less visible tasks that are just as critical.”
Speaking to the Harvard Gazette, Eve Rodsky, an author and expert in the gender division of labour, defined invisible labour as “the conception and planning of a task” as opposed to the actual execution of it.
Let us say your child is invited to a birthday party. Your husband drops them off and pats himself on the back for a job well done. He might even be congratulated for “babysitting” because the bar remains that low in many households.
Taking children to a birthday party is the visible part of the task. What remains invisible are all the actions that got the child to the party in the first place.
There is the RSVP to the invitation, choosing the “chicken nuggets or pizza” food option, buying and wrapping the gift, coaxing the child to sit down and write the birthday card, along with many more micro tasks that were in all likelihood carried out by a woman.
These aspects, the conception and planning parts, are what no one sees. Whereas the execution – the dropping off – is the visible part, the pay-off.
Office housework does not reflect on career graphs
Talking about her book Fair Play, which looks at the invisible tasks in a household, Rodsky said she spoke to a couple who both cook dinner.
“But then the woman said that her husband asks [what she'd like him to cook] and she has to choose the recipe, have all the groceries in the refrigerator, and remind him when to start cooking,” she said.
“Essentially, she was still doing all the conception and planning.”
A 2020 study by Oxfam and the Institute for Women's Policy Research found that women in the US spend two hours more each day cleaning, cooking, taking care of children and doing other unpaid work than men.
And it is not just in the home where women take on extra duties. A study by McKinsey & Company and Leanin.org found that women take on additional work “supporting the well-being of their colleagues”.
In the arena of traditional misogyny, any request for help is deemed by many as nagging
“This mission-critical work is in danger of being relegated to ‘office housework’,” co-author Marianne Cooper wrote in the Harvard Business Review.
“Necessary tasks and activities that benefit the company but go unrecognised, are underappreciated, and don’t lead to career advancement.”
For women, the effects of invisible labour can take a heavy toll. Not least in the arena of traditional misogyny whereby any request for help is deemed by many recipients as “nagging”, but also for mental health, burnout, misery and feelings of emptiness, as well as financial ramifications.
In 2024, it is time for such invisible labour to become visible, and the only way to make it so is for women to stop doing it.
The next time a collection needs to be organised at work, don’t offer your services. Let the chaps do it.
Let daddy take responsibility for the next school dress-up day. They are his children too and he's more than capable of reading the school calendar.
It does not make you a bad person. In current climes, it just makes you a man.
Blackpink World Tour [Born Pink] In Cinemas
Starring: Rose, Jisoo, Jennie, Lisa
Directors: Min Geun, Oh Yoon-Dong
Rating: 3/5
Babumoshai Bandookbaaz
Director: Kushan Nandy
Starring: Nawazuddin Siddiqui, Bidita Bag, Jatin Goswami
Three stars
TEACHERS' PAY - WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
Pay varies significantly depending on the school, its rating and the curriculum. Here's a rough guide as of January 2021:
- top end schools tend to pay Dh16,000-17,000 a month - plus a monthly housing allowance of up to Dh6,000. These tend to be British curriculum schools rated 'outstanding' or 'very good', followed by American schools
- average salary across curriculums and skill levels is about Dh10,000, recruiters say
- it is becoming more common for schools to provide accommodation, sometimes in an apartment block with other teachers, rather than hand teachers a cash housing allowance
- some strong performing schools have cut back on salaries since the pandemic began, sometimes offering Dh16,000 including the housing allowance, which reflects the slump in rental costs, and sheer demand for jobs
- maths and science teachers are most in demand and some schools will pay up to Dh3,000 more than other teachers in recognition of their technical skills
- at the other end of the market, teachers in some Indian schools, where fees are lower and competition among applicants is intense, can be paid as low as Dh3,000 per month
- in Indian schools, it has also become common for teachers to share residential accommodation, living in a block with colleagues
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre, 4-cylinder turbo
Transmission: CVT
Power: 170bhp
Torque: 220Nm
Price: Dh98,900
MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – FINAL RECKONING
Director: Christopher McQuarrie
Starring: Tom Cruise, Hayley Atwell, Simon Pegg
Rating: 4/5
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
How to donate
Send “thenational” to the following numbers or call the hotline on: 0502955999
2289 – Dh10
2252 – Dh 50
6025 – Dh20
6027 – Dh 100
6026 – Dh 200
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Playing records of the top 10 in 2017
How many games the top 10 have undertaken in the 2017 ATP season
1. Rafael Nadal 58 (49-9)
2. Andy Murray 35 (25-10)
3. Roger Federer 38 (35-3)
4. Stan Wawrinka 37 (26-11)
5. Novak Djokovic 40 (32-8)
6. Alexander Zverev 60 (46-14)
7. Marin Cilic 43 (29-14)
8. Dominic Thiem 60 (41-19)
9. Grigor Dimitrov 48 (34-14)
10. Kei Nishikori 43 (30-13)
UAE v Gibraltar
What: International friendly
When: 7pm kick off
Where: Rugby Park, Dubai Sports City
Admission: Free
Online: The match will be broadcast live on Dubai Exiles’ Facebook page
UAE squad: Lucas Waddington (Dubai Exiles), Gio Fourie (Exiles), Craig Nutt (Abu Dhabi Harlequins), Phil Brady (Harlequins), Daniel Perry (Dubai Hurricanes), Esekaia Dranibota (Harlequins), Matt Mills (Exiles), Jaen Botes (Exiles), Kristian Stinson (Exiles), Murray Reason (Abu Dhabi Saracens), Dave Knight (Hurricanes), Ross Samson (Jebel Ali Dragons), DuRandt Gerber (Exiles), Saki Naisau (Dragons), Andrew Powell (Hurricanes), Emosi Vacanau (Harlequins), Niko Volavola (Dragons), Matt Richards (Dragons), Luke Stevenson (Harlequins), Josh Ives (Dubai Sports City Eagles), Sean Stevens (Saracens), Thinus Steyn (Exiles)
Other workplace saving schemes
- The UAE government announced a retirement savings plan for private and free zone sector employees in 2023.
- Dubai’s savings retirement scheme for foreign employees working in the emirate’s government and public sector came into effect in 2022.
- National Bonds unveiled a Golden Pension Scheme in 2022 to help private-sector foreign employees with their financial planning.
- In April 2021, Hayah Insurance unveiled a workplace savings plan to help UAE employees save for their retirement.
- Lunate, an Abu Dhabi-based investment manager, has launched a fund that will allow UAE private companies to offer employees investment returns on end-of-service benefits.
Formula%204%20Italian%20Championship%202023%20calendar
%3Cp%3EApril%2021-23%3A%20Imola%3Cbr%3EMay%205-7%3A%20Misano%3Cbr%3EMay%2026-28%3A%20SPA-Francorchamps%3Cbr%3EJune%2023-25%3A%20Monza%3Cbr%3EJuly%2021-23%3A%20Paul%20Ricard%3Cbr%3ESept%2029-Oct%201%3A%20Mugello%3Cbr%3EOct%2013-15%3A%20Vallelunga%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Dhadak 2
Director: Shazia Iqbal
Starring: Siddhant Chaturvedi, Triptii Dimri
Rating: 1/5
UAE v United States, T20 International Series
Both matches at ICC Academy, Dubai. Admission is free.
1st match: Friday, 2pm
2nd match: Saturday, 2pm
UAE squad: Mohammed Naveed (captain), Rohan Mustafa, Ashfaq Ahmed, Shaiman Anwar, Rameez Shahzad, Amjad Gul, CP Rizwan, Mohammed Boota, Abdul Shakoor, Ahmed Raza, Imran Haider, Sultan Ahmed, Zahoor Khan, Amir Hayat
USA squad: Saurabh Netravalkar (captain), Jaskaran Malhotra, Elmore Hutchinson, Aaron Jones, Nosthush Kenjige, Ali Khan, Jannisar Khan, Xavier Marshall, Monank Patel, Timil Patel, Roy Silva, Jessy Singh, Steven Taylor, Hayden Walsh
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
The Birkin bag is made by Hermès.
It is named after actress and singer Jane Birkin
Noone from Hermès will go on record to say how much a new Birkin costs, how long one would have to wait to get one, and how many bags are actually made each year.
TOURNAMENT INFO
Women’s World Twenty20 Qualifier
Jul 3- 14, in the Netherlands
The top two teams will qualify to play at the World T20 in the West Indies in November
UAE squad
Humaira Tasneem (captain), Chamani Seneviratne, Subha Srinivasan, Neha Sharma, Kavisha Kumari, Judit Cleetus, Chaya Mughal, Roopa Nagraj, Heena Hotchandani, Namita D’Souza, Ishani Senevirathne, Esha Oza, Nisha Ali, Udeni Kuruppuarachchi
Thank You for Banking with Us
Director: Laila Abbas
Starring: Yasmine Al Massri, Clara Khoury, Kamel El Basha, Ashraf Barhoum
Rating: 4/5
