Money can trigger strong emotional reactions, which can lead to not-so-great decisions, such as missing payments or overspending.
A new wave of books urges people to explore their emotional connections to money to make better financial decisions.
“Eighty-five per cent or 90 per cent of our money decisions are based on our emotions,” says Bari Tessler, a financial therapist in Colorado, and author of The Art of Money Workbook, out this month.
“We need to be understanding of what our money emotions are so we do not feel overwhelmed or try to run away.”
Ms Tessler had that experience several years ago, when she felt herself hyperventilating while at a car dealership with her husband. She excused herself to the restroom, where she questioned why she was feeling so anxious.
Ms Tessler realised that she strongly dislikes making quick decisions about money. So, she and her husband took more time to discuss the purchase. As a result, she says, “we made the best decision we could”.
Consider your own money story
When Los Angeles-based author Rebecca Walker started soliciting stories for her essay collection Women Talk Money: Breaking the Taboo, she discovered that many people felt shame for having money, guilt at having more than their parents and regret over earlier financial decisions.
“So many women in my life were holding painful stories about money — confusing, troubling experiences with money,” she says. “So many of us were trying to work all this out on our own, and that was keeping us from getting support.”
Ms Walker encourages readers to explore their own money stories — those experiences, often in childhood, that influenced how they think about money.
“I want them to find at least one story that they are holding onto about money, one memory or fundamental idea that has been shaping their lives about abundance or scarcity, and go from there. How do you want to change that story now?”
Changing that story could result in concrete shifts in spending.
For example, if you grew up watching your parents overspend without saving, then you might have to teach yourself how to save with a tool like the 50/30/20 budget. It suggests putting 50 per cent of your take-home income to needs, 30 per cent to wants and 20 per cent to debt payments and savings.
Reflect on recent money experiences
In her book, Ms Tessler encourages readers to think about their last three money interactions.
“When you were checking out at the grocery store or exchanging money for goods or services in some other way, what emotions popped up?” she asks.
Shame, anger, fear, guilt, joy, sadness and happiness are common reactions.
“Maybe it’s reminding you of a past money mistake you made. Let’s bring some awareness and understanding to it,” she says.
Conduct a body check-in
Giving yourself a body check-in is something Ms Tessler encourages, especially when talking about money with a partner or making big purchases.
Focus on physical sensations, including your breathing, and observe feelings or memories that are surfacing. If you notice you are feeling tense, for example, then you can take a break or go outside before continuing.
We need to be understanding of what our money emotions are so we do not feel overwhelmed or try to run away
Bari Tessler,
financial therapist
Find your own calming techniques
In her book, Finance for the People, Los Angeles-based financial educator Paco de Leon suggests creating a list of strategies that help you to calm down and using them before making a big financial decision, such as buying a house.
She lists ideas such as going for a walk, reading a book and playing an instrument.
“We make decisions based on emotion and rationalise them after,” she says. “But if we could deal with our emotions first, then you can go, ‘I’ve felt my feelings, now I can be rational’.”
Ms de Leon took this approach when deciding whether to take on significant student loans. After setting the stress aside, she made a spreadsheet to crunch the numbers and decided law school was not for her.
Address your debt
Ms de Leon says that carrying debt, whether it is credit card debt or student loans, often makes people feel ashamed. She suggests changing the story we tell ourselves about debt by writing a letter to it.
“Express your feelings; you will see that they are complex. Consider thanking your debt for what it has allowed you to do,” she writes.
Once you process those feelings, it is easier to tackle the debt itself.
Forgive yourself for past mistakes
Self-compassion is a powerful tool, says Michael Thomas Jr, a Georgia-based financial counsellor.
“We are more likely to extend grace and courtesy to other people when they make a mistake,” he says. Forgiving ourselves for past mistakes can help us to move forward.
In her book, Ms Walker writes about forgiving herself for earlier choices to splurge on purchases instead of learning how to invest.
“I let go of the idea that I did this terrible thing and extended compassion to myself, which was liberating,” she says. “It allowed me to move forward in a healthier way.”
Vaccine Progress in the Middle East
About Krews
Founder: Ahmed Al Qubaisi
Based: Abu Dhabi
Founded: January 2019
Number of employees: 10
Sector: Technology/Social media
Funding to date: Estimated $300,000 from Hub71 in-kind support
Libya's Gold
UN Panel of Experts found regime secretly sold a fifth of the country's gold reserves.
The panel’s 2017 report followed a trail to West Africa where large sums of cash and gold were hidden by Abdullah Al Senussi, Qaddafi’s former intelligence chief, in 2011.
Cases filled with cash that was said to amount to $560m in 100 dollar notes, that was kept by a group of Libyans in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso.
A second stash was said to have been held in Accra, Ghana, inside boxes at the local offices of an international human rights organisation based in France.
Company%20profile
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RACE CARD
6.30pm Maiden (TB) Dh82.500 (Dirt) 1,400m
7.05pm Handicap (TB) Dh87,500 (D) 1,400m
7.40pm Handicap (TB) Dh92,500 (Turf) 2,410m
8.15pm Handicap (TB) Dh105,000 (D) 1,900m
8.50pm UAE 2000 Guineas Trial (TB) Conditions Dh183,650 (D) 1,600m
9.25pm Dubai Trophy (TB) Conditions Dh183,650 (T) 1,200m
10pm Handicap (TB) Dh102,500 (T) 1,400m
Race card
6.30pm: Handicap (TB) $68,000 (Dirt) 1,200m
7.05pm: Meydan Cup – Listed Handicap (TB) $88,000 (Turf) 2,810m
7.40pm: UAE 2000 Guineas – Group 3 (TB) $125,000 (D) 1,600m
8.15pm: Firebreak Stakes – Group 3 (TB) $130,000 (D) 1,600m
9.50pm: Meydan Classic – Conditions (TB) $$50,000 (T) 1,400m
9.25pm: Dubai Sprint – Listed Handicap (TB) $88,000 (T) 1,200m
Muguruza's singles career in stats
WTA titles 3
Prize money US$11,128,219 (Dh40,873,133.82)
Wins / losses 293 / 149
Factfile on Garbine Muguruza:
Name: Garbine Muguruza (ESP)
World ranking: 15 (will rise to 5 on Monday)
Date of birth: October 8, 1993
Place of birth: Caracas, Venezuela
Place of residence: Geneva, Switzerland
Height: 6ft (1.82m)
Career singles titles: 4
Grand Slam titles: 2 (French Open 2016, Wimbledon 2017)
Career prize money: $13,928,719
Royal Birkdale Golf Course
Location: Southport, Merseyside, England
Established: 1889
Type: Private
Total holes: 18
Indoor cricket in a nutshell
Indoor Cricket World Cup - Sep 16-20, Insportz, Dubai
16 Indoor cricket matches are 16 overs per side
8 There are eight players per team
9 There have been nine Indoor Cricket World Cups for men. Australia have won every one.
5 Five runs are deducted from the score when a wickets falls
4 Batsmen bat in pairs, facing four overs per partnership
Scoring In indoor cricket, runs are scored by way of both physical and bonus runs. Physical runs are scored by both batsmen completing a run from one crease to the other. Bonus runs are scored when the ball hits a net in different zones, but only when at least one physical run is score.
Zones
A Front net, behind the striker and wicketkeeper: 0 runs
B Side nets, between the striker and halfway down the pitch: 1 run
C Side nets between halfway and the bowlers end: 2 runs
D Back net: 4 runs on the bounce, 6 runs on the full
The biog
Name: Shamsa Hassan Safar
Nationality: Emirati
Education: Degree in emergency medical services at Higher Colleges of Technology
Favourite book: Between two hearts- Arabic novels
Favourite music: Mohammed Abdu and modern Arabic songs
Favourite way to spend time off: Family visits and spending time with friends
Results
5.30pm: Maiden (TB) Dh82,500 (Turf) 1,400m; Winner: Mcmanaman, Sam Hitchcock (jockey), Doug Watson (trainer)
6.05pm: Handicap (TB) Dh87,500 (T) 1,400m; Winner: Bawaasil, Sam Hitchcott, Doug Watson
6.40pm: Handicap (TB) Dh105,000 (Dirt) 1,400m; Winner: Bochart, Fabrice Veron, Satish Seemar
7.15pm: Handicap (TB) Dh105,000 (T) 1,200m; Winner: Mutaraffa, Antonio Fresu, Musabah Al Muhairi
7.50pm: Longines Stakes – Conditions (TB) Dh120,00 (D) 1,900m; Winner: Rare Ninja, Royston Ffrench, Salem bin Ghadayer
8.25pm: Zabeel Trophy – Rated Conditions (TB) Dh120,000 (T) 1,600m; Winner: Alfareeq, Antonio Fresu, Musabah Al Muhairi
9pm: Handicap (TB) Dh105,000 (T) 2,410m; Winner: Good Tidings, Antonio Fresu, Musabah Al Muhairi
9.35pm: Handicap (TB) Dh92,500 (T) 2,000m; Winner: Zorion, Abdul Aziz Al Balushi, Helal Al Alawi
When is VAR used?
• Goals
• Penalty decisions
• Direct red-card incidents
• Mistaken identity
Points tally
1. Australia 52; 2. New Zealand 44; 3. South Africa 36; 4. Sri Lanka 35; 5. UAE 27; 6. India 27; 7. England 26; 8. Singapore 8; 9. Malaysia 3
RUGBY CHAMPIONSHIP FIXTURES
September 30
South Africa v Australia
Argentina v New Zealand
October 7
South Africa v New Zealand
Argentina v Australia
8 traditional Jamaican dishes to try at Kingston 21
- Trench Town Rock: Jamaican-style curry goat served in a pastry basket with a carrot and potato garnish
- Rock Steady Jerk Chicken: chicken marinated for 24 hours and slow-cooked on the grill
- Mento Oxtail: flavoured oxtail stewed for five hours with herbs
- Ackee and salt fish: the national dish of Jamaica makes for a hearty breakfast
- Jamaican porridge: another breakfast favourite, can be made with peanut, cornmeal, banana and plantain
- Jamaican beef patty: a pastry with ground beef filling
- Hellshire Pon di Beach: Fresh fish with pickles
- Out of Many: traditional sweet potato pudding
First-round leaderbaord
-5 C Conners (Can)
-3 B Koepka (US), K Bradley (US), V Hovland (Nor), A Wise (US), S Horsfield (Eng), C Davis (Aus);
-2 C Morikawa (US), M Laird (Sco), C Tringale (US)
Selected others: -1 P Casey (Eng), R Fowler (US), T Hatton (Eng)
Level B DeChambeau (US), J Rose (Eng)
1 L Westwood (Eng), J Spieth (US)
3 R McIlroy (NI)
4 D Johnson (US)
LA LIGA FIXTURES
Friday
Granada v Real Betis (9.30pm)
Valencia v Levante (midnight)
Saturday
Espanyol v Alaves (4pm)
Celta Vigo v Villarreal (7pm)
Leganes v Real Valladolid (9.30pm)
Mallorca v Barcelona (midnight)
Sunday
Atletic Bilbao v Atletico Madrid (4pm)
Real Madrid v Eibar (9.30pm)
Real Sociedad v Osasuna (midnight)
The specs
Engine: four-litre V6 and 3.5-litre V6 twin-turbo
Transmission: six-speed and 10-speed
Power: 271 and 409 horsepower
Torque: 385 and 650Nm
Price: from Dh229,900 to Dh355,000
Premier Futsal 2017 Finals
Al Wasl Football Club; six teams, five-a-side
Delhi Dragons: Ronaldinho
Bengaluru Royals: Paul Scholes
Mumbai Warriors: Ryan Giggs
Chennai Ginghams: Hernan Crespo
Telugu Tigers: Deco
Kerala Cobras: Michel Salgado
Prophets of Rage
(Fantasy Records)
The specs
Price: From Dh180,000 (estimate)
Engine: 2.0-litre turbocharged and supercharged in-line four-cylinder
Transmission: Eight-speed automatic
Power: 320hp @ 5,700rpm
Torque: 400Nm @ 2,200rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 9.7L / 100km
How to donate
Send “thenational” to the following numbers or call the hotline on: 0502955999
2289 – Dh10
2252 – Dh 50
6025 – Dh20
6027 – Dh 100
6026 – Dh 200
White hydrogen: Naturally occurring hydrogen
Chromite: Hard, metallic mineral containing iron oxide and chromium oxide
Ultramafic rocks: Dark-coloured rocks rich in magnesium or iron with very low silica content
Ophiolite: A section of the earth’s crust, which is oceanic in nature that has since been uplifted and exposed on land
Olivine: A commonly occurring magnesium iron silicate mineral that derives its name for its olive-green yellow-green colour
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
The biog
Family: Parents and four sisters
Education: Bachelor’s degree in business management and marketing at American University of Sharjah
A self-confessed foodie, she enjoys trying out new cuisines, her current favourite is the poke superfood bowls
Likes reading: autobiographies and fiction
Favourite holiday destination: Italy
Posts information about challenges, events, runs in other emirates on the group's Instagram account @Anagowrunning
Has created a database of Emirati and GCC sportspeople on Instagram @abeermk, highlight: Athletes
Apart from training, also talks to women about nutrition, healthy lifestyle, diabetes, cholesterol, blood pressure
