I landed a big project a few years ago. I was over the moon and couldn’t stop talking about it to my family and friends. I was supposed to begin work on the project at the start of the following week, but found myself procrastinating.
I came up with different excuses to postpone working on it for days. Thoughts came to mind such as: "This project will take much of my time and I won’t be able to see my family as much."
I questioned my decision to take on the project, thinking it might have been better if I stuck to my regular clients.
Luckily, I sensed that something was off with my behaviour. This wasn’t like my ambitious self at all, as I knew that working on the project would help me progress greatly.
Instead of jumping in and working on the project, I saw myself backing away. Was I self-sabotaging? The thought scared me. But it was true.
It got me thinking: Was it the fear of failure? Or was I worried about the lifestyle changes? I needed to find out the reasons why I seemed to be putting up obstacles that prevented me from progressing.
When I delved deeper into the topic of self-sabotage and read about others’ experiences, I started seeing this pattern clearly in my fellow colleagues.
As disturbing as the idea may seem, that one might be one’s own enemy to achieve success, the good news is that self-sabotage can affect everyone to some degree.
In fact, the bigger a challenge or an opportunity is, the more likely it is that self-sabotage will take place.
But why did I self-sabotage? And why do other entrepreneurs find themselves in such situations?
For me, it was a fear of success, a fear of feeling overwhelmed and burnt out, and not having enough time to do the things I enjoyed most. I was afraid the journey might not be worth the emotional and mental investment.
After reading about and listening to others’ experiences, what they had in common was that they wanted to be in their comfort zone. Stepping out of it to grow might feel overwhelming, especially as many people fear the unknown.
So, what can be done to overcome this hindrance?
It starts with an honest conversation with yourself, which wasn’t an easy feat for me.
I procrastinated for days, but finally came around to it. I paid closer attention to my behaviour and became more aware.
Though self-sabotage is a problem that could greatly hinder our career, it is not a problem that can’t be overcome
Manar Al Hinai
I had to challenge my negative thoughts. I reminded myself of my strengths, what I am capable of achieving, and how I would achieve what I wanted.
I also recalled the saying that "the only way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time”.
Instead of setting unrealistic goals and deadlines, which is one form of self-sabotage that could lead to disappointment, I broke down my project goals into more achievable tasks. That way, I didn’t feel overburdened.
To achieve your goals, you need to be ready for the journey. This means taking care of yourself by getting enough sleep, eating well, taking breaks and taking care of your emotional well-being. Burn out will only set you back – and leave you farther from your goals.
Last but not least, talk to others. I developed my own support system of people who would steer me in the right direction. I sought the advice of professionals in the field, as well as family members and friends.
Though self-sabotage is a problem that could greatly hinder our career, it is not a problem that can’t be overcome. The key is to be aware, focus on your vision and remember that your goals are attainable.
Manar Al Hinai is an award-winning Emirati writer and communications adviser based in Abu Dhabi
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THE DETAILS
Solo: A Star Wars Story
Director: Ron Howard
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Paatal Lok season two
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Stars: Jaideep Ahlawat, Ishwak Singh, Lc Sekhose, Merenla Imsong
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The view from The National
The more serious side of specialty coffee
While the taste of beans and freshness of roast is paramount to the specialty coffee scene, so is sustainability and workers’ rights.
The bulk of genuine specialty coffee companies aim to improve on these elements in every stage of production via direct relationships with farmers. For instance, Mokha 1450 on Al Wasl Road strives to work predominantly with women-owned and -operated coffee organisations, including female farmers in the Sabree mountains of Yemen.
Because, as the boutique’s owner, Garfield Kerr, points out: “women represent over 90 per cent of the coffee value chain, but are woefully underrepresented in less than 10 per cent of ownership and management throughout the global coffee industry.”
One of the UAE’s largest suppliers of green (meaning not-yet-roasted) beans, Raw Coffee, is a founding member of the Partnership of Gender Equity, which aims to empower female coffee farmers and harvesters.
Also, globally, many companies have found the perfect way to recycle old coffee grounds: they create the perfect fertile soil in which to grow mushrooms.
Types of policy
Term life insurance: this is the cheapest and most-popular form of life cover. You pay a regular monthly premium for a pre-agreed period, typically anything between five and 25 years, or possibly longer. If you die within that time, the policy will pay a cash lump sum, which is typically tax-free even outside the UAE. If you die after the policy ends, you do not get anything in return. There is no cash-in value at any time. Once you stop paying premiums, cover stops.
Whole-of-life insurance: as its name suggests, this type of life cover is designed to run for the rest of your life. You pay regular monthly premiums and in return, get a guaranteed cash lump sum whenever you die. As a result, premiums are typically much higher than one term life insurance, although they do not usually increase with age. In some cases, you have to keep up premiums for as long as you live, although there may be a cut-off period, say, at age 80 but it can go as high as 95. There are penalties if you don’t last the course and you may get a lot less than you paid in.
Critical illness cover: this pays a cash lump sum if you suffer from a serious illness such as cancer, heart disease or stroke. Some policies cover as many as 50 different illnesses, although cancer triggers by far the most claims. The payout is designed to cover major financial responsibilities such as a mortgage or children’s education fees if you fall ill and are unable to work. It is cost effective to combine it with life insurance, with the policy paying out once if you either die or suffer a serious illness.
Income protection: this pays a replacement income if you fall ill and are unable to continue working. On the best policies, this will continue either until you recover, or reach retirement age. Unlike critical illness cover, policies will typically pay out for stress and musculoskeletal problems such as back trouble.
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