It seems like this is the year the capital fell victim to that most threatening of musical invasions – the tribute act.
In recent months, barely a weekend has gone by without a heavy outpouring of irony and nostalgia polluting the desert air.
The blame for these infectiously toxic emissions can largely be placed at the doorsteps of three rival Abu Dhabi golf clubs – each seemingly on a vehement mission to trump each other with ever-cheesier competition.
However, it was Abu Dhabi Golf Club that really raised the stakes. On Friday, March 27, it hosted The Concert That Never Happened, an indulgent pick ’n’ mix of counterfeit talent that featured five tribute acts celebrating Madonna, Tina Turner, Lionel Richie, Cher and R Kelly, all on a single bill.
Don’t lie about not being there – we saw all the pictures on Facebook.
That night might have raised the bar for faux bands, but the precedent had already been set. A month earlier, the same golf club, which is near Khalifa City, had hosted a tribute act to The Killers – called The Fillers, amusingly enough – and in November it featured a Queen copycat act called The Bohemians.
You might think the venue had cornered the market in tribute-act gigs, but it is facing strong competition from the Abu Dhabi City Golf Club, which has been on a veritable imitation mission of late. It hosted the Abba tribute band Abba Gold in December, a Bon Jovi tribute in January (who clearly didn’t get the memo about amusing band names and go by the frankly boring moniker of The Bon Jovi Experience), and Coldplay tribute act Coldplace in March.
And on Thursday, Think Floyd, “the UK’s finest tribute to Pink Floyd”, will take to the stage at the venue.
But it doesn’t stop there. A third golf course, Saadiyat Beach Golf Club, is also getting in on the act. In December it showcased a Michael Jackson tribute – called, er, Navi, who might be a very good singer for all we know but clearly needs to raise his game in the clever-name stakes – and Bob Marley tribute Legend in February, as well as The Beatles show Get Back! in October.
Wait, though – that’s not all. While golf clubs seem to be the driving force behind the tribute-act invasion, other venues are getting in on the act, too.
Away from the fairways, the Crowne Plaza Abu Dhabi also had a stab last month with the marginally more credible From the Jam, which at least features one of the founding members of the original act.
In February, Rob Kingsley performed his A Vision of Elvis at Emirates Palace.
And PJ O’Reilly’s did its bit for the counterfeit cause, hosting Sex Pistols act The Pistols Experience (who clearly share the Bon Jovi boys’ lack of imagination), last Saturday, April 11.
It’s undeniable – for reasons one can’t quite fathom – that there is a bona fide explosion of tribute talent coming to the capital right now.
Of course, along the road in Dubai, such sham shenanigans are nothing new, and 1980s-style leotards and wigs have been common stage-wear for some years now.
Much of the action in the city goes down at the ever-excellent The Music Room, where tribute bills have become something of a long-running Friday night tradition.
In recent months, the Bur Dubai venue has hosted the same Bon Jovi, Coldplay, Killers, Queen, Abba, Sex Pistols and Jam impersonators seen in the capital. They will be keeping up the good work this weekend, hosting Think Floyd on Friday, the day after the outfit’s Abu Dhabi gig.
Why so many tribute bands, you might wonder, understandably, given that, if anything, the UAE’s “real” live-music scene is the strongest it’s ever been?
It’s time to look in the mirror – the predominance of these nostalgic cover bands says more about us than them. As Bruce Foxton sang in From the Jam – “the public gets what the public wants”.
And with so many like-minded expats of a similar age, there’s one thing many have in common. It seems what the UAE public wants, more than anything, is to ignore the “now” and escape back to the “then” – to forget the present and shamelessly embrace the music and spirit of their youth.
Just remember, dressing up isn’t cool.
Think Floyd are at Abu Dhabi City Golf Club on Thursday, April 16, and The Music Room, Dubai on Friday, April 17. Tickets are Dh100 from platinumlist.ae
rgarratt@thenational.ae