I was listening to a podcast the other day, one of those madcap radio talk shows in the UK. A few minutes in, one of the presenters cracked a joke that was so obscure, none of his co-hosts got it. The guy should have kept his mouth shut and moved on. Instead, he attempted to explain himself - there was a pun, you see, a play on words. What followed was the longest five seconds of silence you'll ever hear. The show never really recovered.
This reminded me of a class I took in college, Styles and Techniques of Comedy, which broke humour down into its constituent parts: incongruities of scale, the puncturing of human dignity, the violation of taboos and so on.
For about six months afterwards, I didn't laugh at anything. Even my favourite joke ever (What's brown and sticky? A stick!) became mired in theory: Ah, yes, the defeat of expectation, achieved through the use of a homonym. When I was young, my grandmother gave me a piece of advice: "Never look inside a sausage." She went a bit mad not long after saying this, but I think the advice stands up. If you've ever explored a sausage, you'll know: there are things in there you don't want to see.
It's the same with jokes. Their entire existence relies on our not looking at what's inside. A joke explained is no longer a joke.
The philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche once said: "It is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter." Nietzsche, as it happens, also went mad shortly after saying this, so it's possible that borderline psychotics just have good insights into these things. Anyway, the point I'm getting at is this: if we ever needed a bit of uncomplicated laughter, it's now.
Look at this oil spill we're having. Better yet, look at the zany schemes they've dreamt up to stop it. My personal favourite was "top kill", a process that involved blasting the ruptured well with high-pressure jets of "junk" (that is, rubbish) in the hope that it would get clogged up. It didn't, but fish who had tired of their oil diet now had a new range of toxicy tidbits.
Earlier this month, a ship that was collecting oil from the gushing well caught fire, possibly after it was struck by lightning. This is true.
In another radio podcast I listened to recently, the host speculated that the person heading up BP's containment efforts might be Wile E Coyote.
"You can just see him, can't you," he said, "standing on that burning ship, holding up a little sign that reads 'Drat', before crumbling into a heap of ash on the deck."
You see what he was doing there?
Real estate tokenisation project
Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.
The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.
Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.
The specs
Engine: 3.0-litre 6-cyl turbo
Power: 374hp at 5,500-6,500rpm
Torque: 500Nm from 1,900-5,000rpm
Transmission: 8-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 8.5L/100km
Price: from Dh285,000
On sale: from January 2022
The specs
Engine: 4.0-litre flat-six
Torque: 450Nm at 6,100rpm
Transmission: 7-speed PDK auto or 6-speed manual
Fuel economy, combined: 13.8L/100km
On sale: Available to order now
The specs
AT4 Ultimate, as tested
Engine: 6.2-litre V8
Power: 420hp
Torque: 623Nm
Transmission: 10-speed automatic
Price: From Dh330,800 (Elevation: Dh236,400; AT4: Dh286,800; Denali: Dh345,800)
On sale: Now
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Specs
Engine: Dual-motor all-wheel-drive electric
Range: Up to 610km
Power: 905hp
Torque: 985Nm
Price: From Dh439,000
Available: Now
2025 Fifa Club World Cup groups
Group A: Palmeiras, Porto, Al Ahly, Inter Miami.
Group B: Paris Saint-Germain, Atletico Madrid, Botafogo, Seattle.
Group C: Bayern Munich, Auckland City, Boca Juniors, Benfica.
Group D: Flamengo, ES Tunis, Chelsea, (Leon banned).
Group E: River Plate, Urawa, Monterrey, Inter Milan.
Group F: Fluminense, Borussia Dortmund, Ulsan, Mamelodi Sundowns.
Group G: Manchester City, Wydad, Al Ain, Juventus.
Group H: Real Madrid, Al Hilal, Pachuca, Salzburg.
Company%20Profile
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Banned items
Dubai Police has also issued a list of banned items at the ground on Sunday. These include:
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Political flags or banners
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Bikes, skateboards or scooters
MATCH INFO
Uefa Champions League semi-final, first leg
Bayern Munich v Real Madrid
When: April 25, 10.45pm kick-off (UAE)
Where: Allianz Arena, Munich
Live: BeIN Sports HD
Second leg: May 1, Santiago Bernabeu, Madrid
The Orwell Prize for Political Writing
Twelve books were longlisted for The Orwell Prize for Political Writing. The non-fiction works cover various themes from education, gender bias, and the environment to surveillance and political power. Some of the books that made it to the non-fiction longlist include:
- Appeasing Hitler: Chamberlain, Churchill and the Road to War by Tim Bouverie
- Some Kids I Taught and What They Taught Me by Kate Clanchy
- Invisible Women: Exposing Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado Perez
- Follow Me, Akhi: The Online World of British Muslims by Hussein Kesvani
- Guest House for Young Widows: Among the Women of ISIS by Azadeh Moaveni
In numbers: PKK’s money network in Europe
Germany: PKK collectors typically bring in $18 million in cash a year – amount has trebled since 2010
Revolutionary tax: Investigators say about $2 million a year raised from ‘tax collection’ around Marseille
Extortion: Gunman convicted in 2023 of demanding $10,000 from Kurdish businessman in Stockholm
Drug trade: PKK income claimed by Turkish anti-drugs force in 2024 to be as high as $500 million a year
Denmark: PKK one of two terrorist groups along with Iranian separatists ASMLA to raise “two-digit million amounts”
Contributions: Hundreds of euros expected from typical Kurdish families and thousands from business owners
TV channel: Kurdish Roj TV accounts frozen and went bankrupt after Denmark fined it more than $1 million over PKK links in 2013
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Our Time Has Come
Alyssa Ayres, Oxford University Press
The specs: 2017 Dodge Ram 1500 Laramie Longhorn
Price, base / as tested: Dhxxx
Engine: 5.7L V8
Transmission: Eight-speed automatic
Power: 395hp @ 5,600rpm
Torque: 556Nm @ 3,950rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 12.7L / 100km
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Kumulus Water
Started: 2021
Founders: Iheb Triki and Mohamed Ali Abid
Based: Tunisia
Sector: Water technology
Number of staff: 22
Investment raised: $4 million
COMPANY PROFILE
Founders: Alhaan Ahmed, Alyina Ahmed and Maximo Tettamanzi
Total funding: Self funded