Naming your show The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window is a very bold move.
Such a title suggests a parody akin to Airplane!, The Naked Gun, or Scary Movie. One where The Woman in the House would constantly poke fun at recent thrillers like The Girl on the Train, Gone Girl, and Netflix’s own The Woman in the Window.
Which makes it all the more bizarre then that it’s severely lacking when it comes to actual jokes. At times, it doesn’t even seem like it’s trying to make its audience laugh. Or, perhaps, the attempts at humour are so bad they’re not even noticeable. Either way, The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window is, plain and simply, not funny enough.
Over the course of its opening episode, we learn that Anna Whittaker's (Kristen Bell) daughter died in a gruesome fashion, which caused her marriage to forensic psychiatrist Douglas (Michael Ealy) to disintegrate. Three years later, Anna is alone in her huge house, drinking endless glasses of wine, popping prescription pills and staring out of the window at her neighbours, most of whom are now bored by her irrational antics.
But when Neil (Tom Riley), a handsome British widower, moves in across the street with his adorable daughter, Emma (Samsara Leela Yett), Anna slowly starts to build a relationship with the pair. She even dreams of them becoming a family. That’s until she sees a murder in Neil’s house. While those close to Anna insist that it was just a hallucination, she can’t resist starting her own investigation into the death, even though she’s increasingly unstable and doing so immediately puts her in danger.
To be fair to Bell, who sometimes fails to make her mark in comedies that are actually amusing, you can really see that she’s giving it her all as Anna. She does a good job of making you invest in her plight, you’re constantly torn over whether or not she did actually see the murder, and her enthusiastic presence means that spending each 30-minute instalment with her makes for a pleasant enough watch. The problem is that its writers, Hugh Davidson, Larry Dorf and Rachel Ramras, don’t give her the material to actually do anything worthwhile over the show’s eight-episode run.
It’s actually a puzzle why The Woman in the House is a series at all. It never comes close to justifying its four-hour-long running time. Instead it seems much more suitable as a 90-minute movie. Although it arguably doesn’t have enough jokes even for that.
'The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window'
Director:Michael Lehmann
Stars:Kristen Bell
Rating: 1/5
By proceeding as a series, each episode seemingly meanders around, either missing opportunities for gags, or telling the most obvious ones and expecting a pat on the back for doing so, before ending on a cliffhanger designed to keep audiences binging.
There are one or two moments where The Woman in the House actually looks like it’s about to become as outlandish as it should be. In particular, the revelation of how Anna’s daughter died. Ultimately, it’s just too focused on playing safe, and never comes close to being wacky or bizarre enough to warrant such a title.
All eight episodes of The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window will debut on Netflix on January 28
More from Rashmee Roshan Lall
The line up
Friday: Giggs, Sho Madjozi and Masego
Saturday: Nas, Lion Bbae, Roxanne Shante and DaniLeigh
Sole DXB runs from December 6 to 8 at Dubai Design District. Weekend pass is Dh295 while a one day pass is Dh195. Tickets are available from www.soledxb.com
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Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
The advice provided in our columns does not constitute legal advice and is provided for information only. Readers are encouraged to seek independent legal advice.
Ziina users can donate to relief efforts in Beirut
Ziina users will be able to use the app to help relief efforts in Beirut, which has been left reeling after an August blast caused an estimated $15 billion in damage and left thousands homeless. Ziina has partnered with the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees to raise money for the Lebanese capital, co-founder Faisal Toukan says. “As of October 1, the UNHCR has the first certified badge on Ziina and is automatically part of user's top friends' list during this campaign. Users can now donate any amount to the Beirut relief with two clicks. The money raised will go towards rebuilding houses for the families that were impacted by the explosion.”
What can you do?
Document everything immediately; including dates, times, locations and witnesses
Seek professional advice from a legal expert
You can report an incident to HR or an immediate supervisor
You can use the Ministry of Human Resources and Emiratisation’s dedicated hotline
In criminal cases, you can contact the police for additional support
LA LIGA FIXTURES
Saturday (UAE kick-off times)
Leganes v Getafe (12am)
Levante v Alaves (4pm)
Real Madrid v Sevilla (7pm)
Osasuna v Valladolid (9.30pm)
Sunday
Eibar v Atletico Madrid (12am)
Mallorca v Valencia (3pm)
Real Betis v Real Sociedad (5pm)
Villarreal v Espanyol (7pm)
Athletic Bilbao v Celta Vigo (9.30pm)
Monday
Barcelona v Granada (12am)
Quick%20facts
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UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Company name: Play:Date
Launched: March 2017 on UAE Mother’s Day
Founder: Shamim Kassibawi
Based: Dubai with operations in the UAE and US
Sector: Tech
Size: 20 employees
Stage of funding: Seed
Investors: Three founders (two silent co-founders) and one venture capital fund
The%20Kitchen
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%C2%A0%3C%2Fstrong%3EDaniel%20Kaluuya%2C%20Kibwe%20Tavares%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%C2%A0%3C%2Fstrong%3EKane%20Robinson%2C%20Jedaiah%20Bannerman%2C%20Hope%20Ikpoku%20Jnr%2C%20Fiona%20Marr%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%203%2F5%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The Bio
Favourite holiday destination: Either Kazakhstan or Montenegro. I’ve been involved in events in both countries and they are just stunning.
Favourite book: I am a huge of Robin Cook’s medical thrillers, which I suppose is quite apt right now. My mother introduced me to them back home in New Zealand.
Favourite film or television programme: Forrest Gump is my favourite film, that’s never been up for debate. I love watching repeats of Mash as well.
Inspiration: My late father moulded me into the man I am today. I would also say disappointment and sadness are great motivators. There are times when events have brought me to my knees but it has also made me determined not to let them get the better of me.
match info
Southampton 2 (Ings 32' & pen 89') Tottenham Hotspur 5 (Son 45', 47', 64', & 73', Kane 82')
Man of the match Son Heung-min (Tottenham)
UAE squad
Humaira Tasneem (c), Chamani Senevirathne (vc), Subha Srinivasan, NIsha Ali, Udeni Kuruppuarachchi, Chaya Mughal, Roopa Nagraj, Esha Oza, Ishani Senevirathne, Heena Hotchandani, Keveesha Kumari, Judith Cleetus, Chavi Bhatt, Namita D’Souza.
Pharaoh's curse
British aristocrat Lord Carnarvon, who funded the expedition to find the Tutankhamun tomb, died in a Cairo hotel four months after the crypt was opened.
He had been in poor health for many years after a car crash, and a mosquito bite made worse by a shaving cut led to blood poisoning and pneumonia.
Reports at the time said Lord Carnarvon suffered from “pain as the inflammation affected the nasal passages and eyes”.
Decades later, scientists contended he had died of aspergillosis after inhaling spores of the fungus aspergillus in the tomb, which can lie dormant for months. The fact several others who entered were also found dead withiin a short time led to the myth of the curse.
About Housecall
Date started: July 2020
Founders: Omar and Humaid Alzaabi
Based: Abu Dhabi
Sector: HealthTech
# of staff: 10
Funding to date: Self-funded
MORE ON IRAN'S PROXY WARS
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COMPANY%20PROFILE
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UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Richard Jewell
Director: Clint Eastwood
Stars: Paul Walter Hauser, Sam Rockwell, Brandon Stanley
Two-and-a-half out of five stars
Squid Game season two
Director: Hwang Dong-hyuk
Stars: Lee Jung-jae, Wi Ha-joon and Lee Byung-hun
Rating: 4.5/5
AUSTRALIA SQUAD
Tim Paine (captain), Sean Abbott, Pat Cummins, Cameron Green, Marcus Harris, Josh Hazlewood, Travis Head, Moises Henriques, Marnus Labuschagne, Nathan Lyon, Michael Neser, James Pattinson, Will Pucovski, Steve Smith, Mitchell Starc, Mitchell Swepson, Matthew Wade, David Warner
What is safeguarding?
“Safeguarding, not just in sport, but in all walks of life, is making sure that policies are put in place that make sure your child is safe; when they attend a football club, a tennis club, that there are welfare officers at clubs who are qualified to a standard to make sure your child is safe in that environment,” Derek Bell explains.
'The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window'
Director:Michael Lehmann
Stars:Kristen Bell
Rating: 1/5
