How Zeyne turned the pain of the Gaza war and her mother's illness into the power of her new album

Zeyne didn’t know she was making a concept album until the end of the recording. Hearing the suite of 13 songs in one sitting, a narrative began to emerge of an artist rediscovering her voice amid despair at home and in her homeland.

The Palestinian-Jordanian singer describes Awda as a reflection of the past two years, a period in which she confronted her mother’s illness, the value of her own mental health and the question of what it means to release music amid the continuing destruction in Gaza.

But after introducing herself with the powerful 2024 breakout single Asli Ana, a vibrant ode to identity built on dabke rhythm and a spoken-word prelude about heritage and self-worth, it would take another six months before she was able to complete a full song again.

That track, Bali – meaning “my mind” – grew from a challenge by album producer Nasir Al Bashir to capture the alienation and frustration felt at the time. It is not an angry song.

Over a muted beat with darbuka and sighing keyboards, Zeyne laments: “Heavy days, no one warned me. How to bear this weight, what is the key?” The song also draws on the experience caring for her mother while ill.

“It was very therapeutic and it led me to kind of accept some of those feelings that were lingering inside that I was holding on to and suppressing,” she tells The National. “For a long time, for six months, I completely blocked myself from feeling. I felt like I had to stay strong for my mum, for my family, for my community. And the easiest way in my head to do that was to just block off all sorts of emotion. The song was really the first time I felt open and responsive about my own feelings.”

It was a breakthrough, allowing her to take further internal stock. In Yamma, an elegiac and ghostly piece that almost functions like a hymn, Zeyne draws on faith for comfort.

“The first few versions were really sad and didn’t give the feeling that I wanted to portray when telling the story,” she recalls. “It felt like I was giving it from a perspective of no hope, and I think there’s beauty seeing the light when things are really dark. And in times where things are not in your control all you can do is pray and have faith.”

Zeyne describes the final version as “a self-soothing lullaby".

“It was me kind of trying to calm myself down in a time where I couldn’t believe that my reality – like there was a new reality that I had to adapt to. I just accepted that whatever scenario happens after is in God’s hands and will,” she says. “There’s nothing you can do but have faith and a little hope that things might be okay in the end.”

In Yom Wara Yom (OCD), meaning “day after day ", Zeyne confronts her own mind in what is a rare Arabic song that speaks of her life with obsessive-compulsive disorder and the daily ruminations: “I have nothing but to whisper to sleep/ To cover my mind, in calm and clarity,” she sings.

Zeyne says her experience with OCD intensified with her mother’s advancing condition. “It is not just the ‘I need to be tidy,’ it’s more mental in terms of how I think about things and how my brain processes thoughts and events, whether they’re big or small,” she says.

“I was going through a rumination cycle, which is when your brain kind of just loops in these constant thoughts and it’s just like the same thought that you can’t get out of. It feels like you’re stuck in it.”

Hence, she says, the circular and claustrophobic nature of the song is by design. “It starts with the first half of the song actually starting with the loop of the same words even repeating – yom wara yom, yom wara yom – because it does happen,” she says.

“Then when it gets to the thought that really triggers you, the whole mood kind of shifts. There’s a beat switch in the song that kind of takes a more aggressive tone. I literally confront my brain by saying that I need to be myself. The interesting thing is, people thought the lyrics had me talking to a guy, but it was really to myself.”

As to how OCD shapes her craft, Zeyne says she is deeply attentive to every detail of the songwriting process. “It’s always making sure that the lyrics sit right, the sound selection sits right, the composition, the meaning – all together, how do they make you feel?” she says. “I think my brain literally thinks about six different things at once when I listen to the song. I listen to the drums alone, the melody alone, I can listen to everything separately as I’m listening to one track.”

These moments of fragility allow the strident sounds of Asli Ana to take on new meaning within the soul-searching journey of the album. Placed as the second track and, for many, the reason listeners are anticipating Awda, the dabke-fuelled anthem of Palestinian and wider Arab pride hits different.

“Not necessarily softer, but definitely more introspective,” Zeyne notes. “That comes when you hear it as part of the album, which is really about looking inward, trying to find yourself and who you are.”

With the recording journey complete, Zeyne is looking forward to presenting the work with a planned regional tour, including an appearance at Dubai’s Sole DXB festival in December 13.

“Now that the album is out, you can understand my story, relate to it and enjoy it on a different level,” she says. “It will be a totally new energy, and I feel that I’m the same artist, but maybe more in touch and understanding myself better.”

Zeyne performs at Sole DXB on December 13. The festival runs from December 12 to 14 at Dubai Design District. Tickets from Dh549

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