In June last year, Twitter user @bocxtop effectively captured the general global mood by tweeting: “Back in 2014, Happy by Pharrell spent 10 weeks at number one. Could you imagine if he dropped that song now?? He would get 3 streams and a cease and desist letter from society.”
Now, a full year into the pandemic, a cease and desist letter would not go far enough in quashing such unadulterated joy. These days, we'd be looking at divorcing Pharrell on the grounds of cruel and abusive treatment.
Blame it on the zeitgeist, but everything non-streamer-related the entertainment industry has put out over the past year has been low-fi to the point of paralysis, and moody to the point of a teenager whose had their TikTok privileges revoked.
We didn't get a bop from Taylor Swift this year, but rather some sepia-tinged, cottagecore musings about her being like a cardigan, or at the very least a home-knitted house coat. Even the usually top tune-reliant Justin Bieber was found to be in similar navel-gazing territory, pontificating alongside Shawn Mendes on whether being catapulted on to the world's stage at 15 turned him into some kind of fame monster.
Although the Monday, March 15 Oscar nominations announcement is still a month away, by now we pretty much know what's going to make the cut. And make no mistake, no Judy or Bohemian Rhapsody is going to come bursting through a glitter curtain at the eleventh hour to save us all from this dour – though undeniably worthy – collection of films that will have you reaching for your tissues instead of popcorn.
This year, as Hollywood attempts to reflect the way we live now right back at us, there is nothing on the slate that might be considered even vague escapism. Even Borat Subsequent Moviefilm is aggressively uncomfortable.
There's Nomadland, which will likely (deservedly) win Frances McDormand her third Oscar, in which a woman loses her job and sets up home in a trailer park, along with a host of other disenfranchised "nomads" – but not the trendy, Gen Z, digital kind.
There's Pieces of a Woman, in which The Crown's Vanessa Kirby's home birth goes tragically wrong. In The Father, Anthony Hopkins descends into dementia, while Promising Young Woman has become a warning for every promising young man.
Then there's The Mauritanian, a true story focusing on the relentlessly grim realities of a man falsely imprisoned at Guantanamo Bay.
For the 2021 Academy Awards, there is no La La Land. No Black Panther. No Bohemian Rhapsody, no Toy Story 4…
There is a Parasite, except it's not actually a film, it's all of us, it's our reality and we're all just living in Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk's basement.
But it hasn't always been the case that hard times deserve hard films. During the Great Depression of the 1930s, Hollywood had this idea that people might want cheering up when the family farm got repossessed after locusts ate the season's crops. That's why we got the jazz hands-fest of 42nd Street, the ruby-slippered joy of The Wizard of Oz, and the ground-breaking King Kong.
This is because sometimes, hard times are made a little better with some pie in the sky. Or, as Mary Poppins once put it: "A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down".
But hey, at least we'll have Hamilton… Except, oh no, sorry, the Academy deemed the Tony Award winner ineligible seeing as it isn't technically a film.
Sorry folks, this year, if you want a side helping of escapism with your pandemic, you're not getting it from the Oscars. Best seek it elsewhere, perhaps from the likes of Doja Cat, Dua Lipa and Bridgerton's Duke of Hastings.
Especially him.
The years Ramadan fell in May
The years Ramadan fell in May
Indoor cricket in a nutshell
Indoor Cricket World Cup - Sept 16-20, Insportz, Dubai
16 Indoor cricket matches are 16 overs per side
8 There are eight players per team
9 There have been nine Indoor Cricket World Cups for men. Australia have won every one.
5 Five runs are deducted from the score when a wickets falls
4 Batsmen bat in pairs, facing four overs per partnership
Scoring In indoor cricket, runs are scored by way of both physical and bonus runs. Physical runs are scored by both batsmen completing a run from one crease to the other. Bonus runs are scored when the ball hits a net in different zones, but only when at least one physical run is score.
Zones
A Front net, behind the striker and wicketkeeper: 0 runs
B Side nets, between the striker and halfway down the pitch: 1 run
C Side nets between halfway and the bowlers end: 2 runs
D Back net: 4 runs on the bounce, 6 runs on the full
Profile of Udrive
Date started: March 2016
Founder: Hasib Khan
Based: Dubai
Employees: 40
Amount raised (to date): $3.25m – $750,000 seed funding in 2017 and a Seed round of $2.5m last year. Raised $1.3m from Eureeca investors in January 2021 as part of a Series A round with a $5m target.
What drives subscription retailing?
Once the domain of newspaper home deliveries, subscription model retailing has combined with e-commerce to permeate myriad products and services.
The concept has grown tremendously around the world and is forecast to thrive further, according to UnivDatos Market Insights’ report on recent and predicted trends in the sector.
The global subscription e-commerce market was valued at $13.2 billion (Dh48.5bn) in 2018. It is forecast to touch $478.2bn in 2025, and include the entertainment, fitness, food, cosmetics, baby care and fashion sectors.
The report says subscription-based services currently constitute “a small trend within e-commerce”. The US hosts almost 70 per cent of recurring plan firms, including leaders Dollar Shave Club, Hello Fresh and Netflix. Walmart and Sephora are among longer established retailers entering the space.
UnivDatos cites younger and affluent urbanites as prime subscription targets, with women currently the largest share of end-users.
That’s expected to remain unchanged until 2025, when women will represent a $246.6bn market share, owing to increasing numbers of start-ups targeting women.
Personal care and beauty occupy the largest chunk of the worldwide subscription e-commerce market, with changing lifestyles, work schedules, customisation and convenience among the chief future drivers.
Indoor cricket in a nutshell
Indoor Cricket World Cup – Sep 16-20, Insportz, Dubai
16 Indoor cricket matches are 16 overs per side
8 There are eight players per team
9 There have been nine Indoor Cricket World Cups for men. Australia have won every one.
5 Five runs are deducted from the score when a wickets falls
4 Batsmen bat in pairs, facing four overs per partnership
Scoring In indoor cricket, runs are scored by way of both physical and bonus runs. Physical runs are scored by both batsmen completing a run from one crease to the other. Bonus runs are scored when the ball hits a net in different zones, but only when at least one physical run is score.
Zones
A Front net, behind the striker and wicketkeeper: 0 runs
B Side nets, between the striker and halfway down the pitch: 1 run
C Side nets between halfway and the bowlers end: 2 runs
D Back net: 4 runs on the bounce, 6 runs on the full
Mohammed bin Zayed Majlis
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Lexus LX700h specs
Engine: 3.4-litre twin-turbo V6 plus supplementary electric motor
Power: 464hp at 5,200rpm
Torque: 790Nm from 2,000-3,600rpm
Transmission: 10-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 11.7L/100km
On sale: Now
Price: From Dh590,000
