When Jaspreet Kaur describes using her mother’s Jolen Creme Bleach on her sideburns when she was 11 because a boy at school said that she looked like a gorilla, repressed memories from many readers' early teenage years of that teal-coloured tub of cream will come to mind. Jolen Bleach is a staple in the bathroom cabinets of many young South Asian women, something Kaur addresses in her book Brown Girl Like Me: The Essential Guidebook and Manifesto for South Asian Girls and Women.
After recalling a string of makeshift hair removal fiascos, Kaur explains that brown girl body hair follicles are thicker than lighter-skinned hair by genetic design. “They won’t go down without a fight,” she writes, before pointing out contradictions in the public portrayal and acceptance of body hair: when white women flaunt armpit hair it’s seen as feminist and revolutionary – but on brown women, it’s “grotesque".
There are so many differences and there isn’t only one story or one voice, but I wanted to show how many similarities we all have because we all exist in brown bodies
Jaspreet Kaur,
author
Body hair is only one subject explored in this wide-ranging manifesto, which contains the voices of psychologists, artists, comedians, educators, well-being practitioners and more. Chapters tackle topics such as education, menstruation and shame, cultural appropriation, dating and relationships, parenthood, social media and mental health, and each begins with a poem penned by Kaur.
Kaur began writing in March 2020, but says the book was seven years in the making. “I had the concept for quite a while, and the ideas for the chapters formed over the years,” says Kaur, who has a background in gender studies and taught history, sociology and politics in London secondary schools.
Brown Girl Like Me, published by Pan Macmillan’s award-winning non-fiction imprint, Bluebird, releases on February 17.
Lifting the lid on mental health
The book opens by exploring mental health – a chapter Kaur believes is the most urgent and pressing, as she questions why we in brown communities equate strength with silence, and urges that we take action to destigmatise mental health issues. She looks at how depression is often seen as a “white” or “western” problem, and how western therapists, with their white lenses, often misunderstand South Asian cultures and families, urging patients to adopt more “independent” lifestyles. But “the outright dismissal of our traditions is not the solution”, writes Kaur, who lists faith, family and culture as “other variables” that brown girls often have to consider.
Kaur cites black and Indian feminist writers such as bell hooks and Arundhati Roy as inspirations, as their writing styles interweave their personal experiences with research and activism. For while Brown Girl Like Me is packed with facts and stats, it isn’t purely academic – it’s laced with anecdotes from Kaur’s own life. “I wanted to be honest and open because I knew that including and interweaving my experiences alongside the academic research and the interviews with other women, was what would open up people a little bit,” Kaur tells The National.
Inclusive of all brown women
At the same time, Kaur acknowledges that brown girls are an incredibly diverse faction. “I recognise that the brown woman’s experience isn’t just one single experience,” says Kaur. “There are so many differences and there isn’t only one story or one voice, but I wanted to show how many similarities we all have because we all exist in brown bodies.” She also ensured that her research sample contained demographics from different regions – from India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, for instance, as well as a variety of ages.
“The youngest interviewee from the book is around the age of 16, all the way up to women in their eighties and nineties,” says Kaur. “I wanted that intergenerational lens. I want this to be reflective of as many Asian women as possible while also recognising there are lots of different layers and differences within there too.”
Kaur interviews the brown female founders of numerous social and activist initiatives to show the increasing spirit of sisterhood, both online and offline, developing among women from this demographic. “I think that’s really special, and that hasn’t been seen in any other time in human history, Asian women coming together like this,” she explains. “I really wanted to document that in this book, so it doesn’t get forgotten.”
Kaur is candid throughout, deeming domestic expectations as “patriarchal nonsense” and emphasising the importance of self-love prior to seeking love from others. “Marriage is not the only happily ever after,” she writes, while also advising spouses to share parenting duties equally, and adding that she was the one who proposed to her husband, instead of the other way around.
Rejecting binary models
A portrait from Kaur’s own wedding, where she is dressed up in an ornate bridal outfit, with decadent jewellery and sunglasses, is the cover image of her book. “So often when we see Asian women being portrayed by the western mainstream media they are seen as meek, submissive and docile with that kind of that victimhood mentality, but I wanted to show how I see Asian women as incredible, strong, regal and fierce characters, and this image really encompassed that to me,” she explains.
By rejecting the traditional “shy bride” look while still appreciating elements of her culture, Kaur reaches a comfortable compromise, and she hopes her readers can achieve this too, rather than feel they have to choose between two extremes. She calls the “between two cultures” narrative an “outdated binary model", at times offensive and downright unrealistic.
“When you look at the western media, it’s always one or another. You’re either oppressed by your culture or religion or you completely abandon it. You’re veiled or unveiled, traditional or modern, and I wanted to show that for most Asian women, it’s everything along that spectrum, everything in between – all the messiness, the good, the bad and the ugly of managing these different things we have to navigate as [South] Asian women,” she says. “The way that we can undo and move away from this outdated binary model is through storytelling, through listening to these voices and perspectives.”
Kaur vocalises a concern that many brown women have about owning their culture while fitting into an increasingly globalised world: “As we become the next wave of brown mothers raising our children, is it possible to raise brown feminists [both girls and boys] without entirely rejecting our own culture and fitting into what western feminist standards dictate? Well, of course,” she writes.
“Our parents and grandparents’ jobs were to make sure we survived. It’s now our job to make sure we thrive.”
Results:
6.30pm: Handicap (Turf) | US$175,000 2,410m | Winner: Bin Battuta, Christophe Soumillon (jockey), Saeed bin Suroor (trainer)
7.05pm: UAE 1000 Guineas Trial Conditions (Dirt) | $100,000 | 1,400m | Winner: Al Hayette, Fabrice Veron, Ismail Mohammed
7.40pm: Handicap (T) | $145,000 | 1,000m | Winner: Faatinah, Jim Crowley, David Hayes
8.15pm: Dubawi Stakes Group 3 (D) | $200,000 | 1,200m | Winner: Raven’s Corner, Richard Mullen, Satish Seemar
8.50pm: Singspiel Stakes Group 3 (T) | $200,000 | 1,800m | Winner: Dream Castle, Christophe Soumillon, Saeed bin Suroor
9.25pm: Handicap (T) | $175,000 | 1,400m | Winner: Another Batt, Connor Beasley, George Scott
The specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4-cyl turbo
Power: 201hp at 5,200rpm
Torque: 320Nm at 1,750-4,000rpm
Transmission: 6-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 8.7L/100km
Price: Dh133,900
On sale: now
'Nope'
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Chatham House Rule
A mark of Chatham House’s influence 100 years on since its founding, was Moscow’s formal declaration last month that it was an “undesirable
organisation”.
The depth of knowledge and academics that it drew on
following the Ukraine invasion had broadcast Mr Putin’s chicanery.
The institute is more used to accommodating world leaders,
with Nelson Mandela, Margaret Thatcher among those helping it provide
authoritative commentary on world events.
Chatham House was formally founded as the Royal Institute of
International Affairs following the peace conferences of World War One. Its
founder, Lionel Curtis, wanted a more scientific examination of international affairs
with a transparent exchange of information and ideas.
That arena of debate and analysis was enhanced by the “Chatham
House Rule” states that the contents of any meeting can be discussed outside Chatham
House but no mention can be made identifying individuals who commented.
This has enabled some candid exchanges on difficult subjects
allowing a greater degree of free speech from high-ranking figures.
These meetings are highly valued, so much so that
ambassadors reported them in secret diplomatic cables that – when they were
revealed in the Wikileaks reporting – were thus found to have broken the rule. However,
most speeches are held on the record.
Its research and debate has offered fresh ideas to
policymakers enabling them to more coherently address troubling issues from climate
change to health and food security.
TRAP
Starring: Josh Hartnett, Saleka Shyamalan, Ariel Donaghue
Director: M Night Shyamalan
Rating: 3/5
Mohammed bin Zayed Majlis
UAE central contracts
Full time contracts
Rohan Mustafa, Ahmed Raza, Mohammed Usman, Chirag Suri, Mohammed Boota, Sultan Ahmed, Zahoor Khan, Junaid Siddique, Waheed Ahmed, Zawar Farid
Part time contracts
Aryan Lakra, Ansh Tandon, Karthik Meiyappan, Rahul Bhatia, Alishan Sharafu, CP Rizwaan, Basil Hameed, Matiullah, Fahad Nawaz, Sanchit Sharma
Benefits of first-time home buyers' scheme
- Priority access to new homes from participating developers
- Discounts on sales price of off-plan units
- Flexible payment plans from developers
- Mortgages with better interest rates, faster approval times and reduced fees
- DLD registration fee can be paid through banks or credit cards at zero interest rates
How to help
Send “thenational” to the following numbers or call the hotline on: 0502955999
2289 – Dh10
2252 – Dh 50
6025 – Dh20
6027 – Dh 100
6026 – Dh 200
Ziina users can donate to relief efforts in Beirut
Ziina users will be able to use the app to help relief efforts in Beirut, which has been left reeling after an August blast caused an estimated $15 billion in damage and left thousands homeless. Ziina has partnered with the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees to raise money for the Lebanese capital, co-founder Faisal Toukan says. “As of October 1, the UNHCR has the first certified badge on Ziina and is automatically part of user's top friends' list during this campaign. Users can now donate any amount to the Beirut relief with two clicks. The money raised will go towards rebuilding houses for the families that were impacted by the explosion.”
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More from Rashmee Roshan Lall
Specs
Engine: 51.5kW electric motor
Range: 400km
Power: 134bhp
Torque: 175Nm
Price: From Dh98,800
Available: Now
Volvo ES90 Specs
Engine: Electric single motor (96kW), twin motor (106kW) and twin motor performance (106kW)
Power: 333hp, 449hp, 680hp
Torque: 480Nm, 670Nm, 870Nm
On sale: Later in 2025 or early 2026, depending on region
Price: Exact regional pricing TBA
Ferrari 12Cilindri specs
Engine: naturally aspirated 6.5-liter V12
Power: 819hp
Torque: 678Nm at 7,250rpm
Price: From Dh1,700,000
Available: Now
The years Ramadan fell in May
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Global state-owned investor ranking by size
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China
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UAE
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Japan
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Norway
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Canada
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The specs: 2018 BMW X2 and X3
Price, as tested: Dh255,150 (X2); Dh383,250 (X3)
Engine: 2.0-litre turbocharged inline four-cylinder (X2); 3.0-litre twin-turbo inline six-cylinder (X3)
Power 192hp @ 5,000rpm (X2); 355hp @ 5,500rpm (X3)
Torque: 280Nm @ 1,350rpm (X2); 500Nm @ 1,520rpm (X3)
Transmission: Seven-speed automatic (X2); Eight-speed automatic (X3)
Fuel consumption, combined: 5.7L / 100km (X2); 8.3L / 100km (X3)
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
Mohammed bin Zayed Majlis
NINE WINLESS GAMES
Arsenal 2-2 Crystal Palace (Oct 27, PL)
Liverpool 5-5 Arsenal (Oct 30, EFL)
Arsenal 1-1 Wolves (Nov 02, PL)
Vitoria Guimaraes 1-1 Arsenal (Nov 6, Europa)
Leicester 2-0 Arsenal (Nov 9, PL)
Arsenal 2-2 Southampton (Nov 23, PL)
Arsenal 1-2 Eintracht Frankfurt (Nov 28, Europa)
Norwich 2-2 Arsenal (Dec 01, PL)
Arsenal 1-2 Brighton (Dec 05, PL)
Where to donate in the UAE
The Emirates Charity Portal
You can donate to several registered charities through a “donation catalogue”. The use of the donation is quite specific, such as buying a fan for a poor family in Niger for Dh130.
The General Authority of Islamic Affairs & Endowments
The site has an e-donation service accepting debit card, credit card or e-Dirham, an electronic payment tool developed by the Ministry of Finance and First Abu Dhabi Bank.
Al Noor Special Needs Centre
You can donate online or order Smiles n’ Stuff products handcrafted by Al Noor students. The centre publishes a wish list of extras needed, starting at Dh500.
Beit Al Khair Society
Beit Al Khair Society has the motto “From – and to – the UAE,” with donations going towards the neediest in the country. Its website has a list of physical donation sites, but people can also contribute money by SMS, bank transfer and through the hotline 800-22554.
Dar Al Ber Society
Dar Al Ber Society, which has charity projects in 39 countries, accept cash payments, money transfers or SMS donations. Its donation hotline is 800-79.
Dubai Cares
Dubai Cares provides several options for individuals and companies to donate, including online, through banks, at retail outlets, via phone and by purchasing Dubai Cares branded merchandise. It is currently running a campaign called Bookings 2030, which allows people to help change the future of six underprivileged children and young people.
Emirates Airline Foundation
Those who travel on Emirates have undoubtedly seen the little donation envelopes in the seat pockets. But the foundation also accepts donations online and in the form of Skywards Miles. Donated miles are used to sponsor travel for doctors, surgeons, engineers and other professionals volunteering on humanitarian missions around the world.
Emirates Red Crescent
On the Emirates Red Crescent website you can choose between 35 different purposes for your donation, such as providing food for fasters, supporting debtors and contributing to a refugee women fund. It also has a list of bank accounts for each donation type.
Gulf for Good
Gulf for Good raises funds for partner charity projects through challenges, like climbing Kilimanjaro and cycling through Thailand. This year’s projects are in partnership with Street Child Nepal, Larchfield Kids, the Foundation for African Empowerment and SOS Children's Villages. Since 2001, the organisation has raised more than $3.5 million (Dh12.8m) in support of over 50 children’s charities.
Noor Dubai Foundation
Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum launched the Noor Dubai Foundation a decade ago with the aim of eliminating all forms of preventable blindness globally. You can donate Dh50 to support mobile eye camps by texting the word “Noor” to 4565 (Etisalat) or 4849 (du).
