An announcement of a royal birth is always guaranteed to send the public pulse racing in the UK and, true to form, the newspapers have been full of the Duchess of Cambridge's pregnancy after the news broke last weekend. Yet this simple story has developed in a way that none could have predicted.
The Duchess had been admitted to the exclusive King Edward VII hospital in the centre of London after suffering acute morning sickness. The hospital is no stranger to handling VIPs, but it only takes a moment of inattention for security to be breached.
Thus it was that an unsuspecting nurse who answered the telephone was persuaded that an incoming call was from Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles requesting an update on the Duchess's condition.
In fact, it was a publicity stunt by a couple of chancers, Mel Greig and Michael Christian, for a show on the Sydney-based radio station 2Day FM. The unsuspecting nurse, Jacintha Saldanha, forwarded the call to a colleague on the ward, who gave a frank summation of the patient's health to the gleeful radio presenters.
No matter that the impersonations was remarkably tactless - the prank rendered the unoffending nurse something of a laughing stock in the international media.
But never mind. No harm done. Or so it seemed. The Duchess was safely discharged a day later, we all had a good giggle, and life moved on. The only person affected was Ms Saldanha, whose unblemished four-year record at the hospital was now tarnished, albeit through no fault of her own.
Then the news turned tragic - Ms Saldanha was found dead on Friday morning. It's too early to speculate on the cause of her death, but suffice it to say that her last week must have been difficult. Hospital spokespeople confirmed that Ms Saldanha had been going through a bad time in the days since the hoax. She leaves a partner and two children.
I've always found baffling the nature of practical jokes and pranks - and indeed, those who purvey them. It seems that those who indulge in such pranks are themselves trying to replicate a sense of humour they don't actually possess, much like the cafe bore who substitutes an endless stream of jokes to cover his lack of wit.
Radio shock-jocks are particularly susceptible in this regard (with several high-profile examples in the UK in recent years), while even in the theatre I know a number of actors who are notorious for playing pranks during performances. It's a dreary indulgence that forces their colleagues to pretend to find it funny to avoid causing offence. What could be less amusing?
My parents ran a little store in Britain while I was growing up, and on one occasion they were persuaded by a particularly glib salesman to install a small stand devoted to such diversions: sachets of itching powder, fake sugar cubes dotted with plastic flies, plastic dog mess that you could place in the middle of the carpet. Very classy stuff.
One incident changed my attitude forever. One of the products was a set of stickers with cheeky sayings on them, one example being "notice my beautiful body". One night I decided it might be a laugh if I stuck the label on my mum's back while she was serving customers in the shop.
It did indeed raise several smiles. But my mum was by then in her mid-50s, a large woman who despite her amiable personality was struggling desperately to maintain her looks and figure against insuperable odds.
My delight at the smirks from customers brought me a momentary feeling of superiority, but the image that is burnt in my memory is the look on my mum's face when she discovered the prank.
Having read it in silence, she rolled it up, tossed it in the bin and returned to her duties. I may only have been a teenager, but I recall with searing clarity the momentary look of dismay, humiliation and betrayal etched on her features. It passed in an instant. But it cured me of practical jokes for all time.
The great Mark Twain once wrote: "When grown-ups indulge in practical jokes, the fact gauges them. They've lived narrow, ignorant lives, full of leftover standards that would have been long since discarded with their boyhood if they'd led a fuller life."
His words, sadly, will have a special resonance this week.
Michael Simkins is an actor and writer based in London
On Twitter: @michael_simkins
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More from Rashmee Roshan Lall
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Milestones on the road to union
1970
October 26: Bahrain withdraws from a proposal to create a federation of nine with the seven Trucial States and Qatar.
December: Ahmed Al Suwaidi visits New York to discuss potential UN membership.
1971
March 1: Alex Douglas Hume, Conservative foreign secretary confirms that Britain will leave the Gulf and “strongly supports” the creation of a Union of Arab Emirates.
July 12: Historic meeting at which Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid make a binding agreement to create what will become the UAE.
July 18: It is announced that the UAE will be formed from six emirates, with a proposed constitution signed. RAK is not yet part of the agreement.
August 6: The fifth anniversary of Sheikh Zayed becoming Ruler of Abu Dhabi, with official celebrations deferred until later in the year.
August 15: Bahrain becomes independent.
September 3: Qatar becomes independent.
November 23-25: Meeting with Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid and senior British officials to fix December 2 as date of creation of the UAE.
November 29: At 5.30pm Iranian forces seize the Greater and Lesser Tunbs by force.
November 30: Despite a power sharing agreement, Tehran takes full control of Abu Musa.
November 31: UK officials visit all six participating Emirates to formally end the Trucial States treaties
December 2: 11am, Dubai. New Supreme Council formally elects Sheikh Zayed as President. Treaty of Friendship signed with the UK. 11.30am. Flag raising ceremony at Union House and Al Manhal Palace in Abu Dhabi witnessed by Sheikh Khalifa, then Crown Prince of Abu Dhabi.
December 6: Arab League formally admits the UAE. The first British Ambassador presents his credentials to Sheikh Zayed.
December 9: UAE joins the United Nations.
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The specs
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WHAT FANS WILL LOVE ABOUT RUSSIA
FANS WILL LOVE
Uber is ridiculously cheap and, as Diego Saez discovered, mush safer. A 45-minute taxi from Pulova airport to Saint Petersburg’s Nevsky Prospect can cost as little as 500 roubles (Dh30).
FANS WILL LOATHE
Uber policy in Russia is that they can start the fare as soon as they arrive at the pick-up point — and oftentimes they start it even before arriving, or worse never arrive yet charge you anyway.
FANS WILL LOVE
It’s amazing how active Russians are on social media and your accounts will surge should you post while in the country. Throw in a few Cyrillic hashtags and watch your account numbers rocket.
FANS WILL LOATHE
With cold soups, bland dumplings and dried fish, Russian cuisine is not to everybody’s tastebuds. Fortunately, there are plenty Georgian restaurants to choose from, which are both excellent and economical.
FANS WILL LOVE
The World Cup will take place during St Petersburg's White Nights Festival, which means perpetual daylight in a city that genuinely never sleeps. (Think toddlers walking the streets with their grandmothers at 4am.)
FANS WILL LOATHE
The walk from Krestovsky Ostrov metro station to Saint Petersburg Arena on a rainy day makes you wonder why some of the $1.7 billion was not spent on a weather-protected walkway.
Some of Darwish's last words
"They see their tomorrows slipping out of their reach. And though it seems to them that everything outside this reality is heaven, yet they do not want to go to that heaven. They stay, because they are afflicted with hope." - Mahmoud Darwish, to attendees of the Palestine Festival of Literature, 2008
His life in brief: Born in a village near Galilee, he lived in exile for most of his life and started writing poetry after high school. He was arrested several times by Israel for what were deemed to be inciteful poems. Most of his work focused on the love and yearning for his homeland, and he was regarded the Palestinian poet of resistance. Over the course of his life, he published more than 30 poetry collections and books of prose, with his work translated into more than 20 languages. Many of his poems were set to music by Arab composers, most significantly Marcel Khalife. Darwish died on August 9, 2008 after undergoing heart surgery in the United States. He was later buried in Ramallah where a shrine was erected in his honour.
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